An Open Letter to the Oxygen Network
December 29, 2003
Oxygen! Again with the Roseanne episodes labeled as Absolutely Fabulous! Oy with the poodles already!
What the eff is your problem?
See, here's how the happy world of TiVo is supposed to work. I tell TiVo to record all eps of AbFab. You tell TiVo when AbFab is on. But no, you tell TiVo that AbFab is on when really, it's Roseanne. This is where the entire system breaks down, Oxygen, and as far as I can tell, the blame is solely in your court.
What do you need me to do, Oxygen? Help me help you. I want to watch your network. Yes, I'm going to fast-forward the commercials but I will watch your network! Should I use reverse psychology and record Roseanne episodes? Should I write a letter to The Oprah telling her what fuckwits you are? Do you have an 800 number I can call to tell you to knock it off? Do you need a program fact checker to make sure you're sending the right information to the TiVo-program-guide-bot?
Seriously, do it again and I will destroy you. I mean it, I'll...I'll...I'll post more tantrums about you! Don't mess with the Almighty Amalah and her little blog! AbFab? Good. Yes. Show it. Really.
Just count your lucky stars that TiVo also recorded the Happy Days episode where Tom Hanks plays a karate expert seeking revenge on Fonzie, because I'd be really, really mad otherwise.