Today I Shall Eat Lettuce Like a Little Bunny
March 26, 2004
It's Friday. Friday Friday Friday.
Friday.
Aaaaand, it's beautiful outside, which put me in the BEST MOOD this morning. I was all set to write a post about bunnies and sunshine and the Return of the Cadbury Creme Egg.
But. Then. (You knew the happy couldn't last, right?)
I decided today would be a lovely day to break out some capris from last year. I have these linen ones that are very earth-mother-granola-I-heart-the-universe and I wanted to wear them. Well guess what?
Right, you saw where this was going before I even started. They didn't fit. At all. The side pockets did that horrific stretch thing that I cannot even describe...it's like the poor pants call in the fabric from inside the pockets as reserves to try to stretch around your hips. I got them zipped and all but then you have the squoosh factor above the waistband. And since I was determined to thoroughly destroy the happy sunshine and puppies vibe I had going on this morning, I looked in a full-length mirror after getting them on.
The one thing I can say? Is that my calves and ankles are very nice and skinny. From my knees down? I am rocking those capris. Let's all focus on Amy's pretty ankles today.
Anyway. So now I'm in boring old khakis that are also feeling tight because my fragile little ego (snort) has been shaken to its very core.
And the little zip-up hoodie I'm wearing smells like an ashtray. I just now noticed. Ew.
So it's Friday. Big freaking whoop. Somebody go buy me Cadbury Creme Eggs.
More important than anything, enjoy the day. Its a rebellion of the storage area, dryers, microwaves and fridges. Remember that! (And yeah, that comment was pretty inside...sorry everyone.)
It's not you. There is a maniacal gang of seamstresses roaming the U.S. They break into people's homes and take in their summer pants and dresses. They must be stopped!
Oli is right. They got to all my clothes too. Seriously girl - I feel your pain, which helps exactly ZERO. But I could write a book about how I am nowhere near the "Happy Zoot Size" I was last summer.
Yeah, wat Oli said, that is true. Didn't you see it on CNN this morning?? They're evil women. I hear some are disguised as giant strawberries!
Please, please write me a guest entry. I'm all out of funny ideas.
The same thing happened to me on Thursday (shoves 2 more Girl Scout thin mint cookies into mouth).
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.
Not you too! Those damn seamstresses have done quite a number on my summer AND winter wardrobe this year...