My Adventures With This Guy
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Conversations with the Cactus

IMing with Chris, in which we further discuss the wrongness of certain foods, the stupidness of Amy and also manage to insult Iceland.

Amalah: ok, I just finished a yogurt. I just now picked up the foil cap and noticed it had been punctured, like with a knife or something. Am I going to die?

RudeCactus: I sincerely doubt it

Amalah: I'm very disturbed.

RudeCactus: if you do, you can haunt me and tell me for the rest of my life that I was wrong...but I'm pretty confident you'll be ok

Amalah: who tampers with yogurt? WHO?

RudeCactus: people who hate their food to be an oxymoron

Amalah: Maybe they were trying to prove a point about deliberately eating fruit flavored bacteria cultures

RudeCactus: see, you put it like that and I have no idea why I eat yogurt

Amalah: That's my point! Food is weird.

RudeCactus: blue cheese...why eat food that has obviously gone bad?

RudeCactus: and aged beef? how is that a good idea?

Amalah: Like right now? I'm drinking a bottle of water that is Natural Icelandic Spring Water. How do I know that Iceland water is good and pure and good? Just because its foreign doesn't mean Iceland doesn't get its water from the sewage plant.

RudeCactus: but it could be foreign sewage and therefore better

Amalah: The bottle says this, "From the virtually untouched land of the Midnight Sun and the Northern Lights comes an extraordinary water."

RudeCactus: virtually untouched? Iceland?

Amalah: Aren't vikings from Iceland? I could be drinking preserved viking piss for all I know.

RudeCactus: you know, that could be a good marketing strategy

Amalah: Which is a lovely thought that is not helping the tainted yogurt digestion

RudeCactus: ok...its probably nice fresh spring water purified only by the kisses of butterflies

Amalah: so insect shit, is what you're telling me

RudeCactus: kisses...thankfully different than shit

Amalah: I am so stupid

RudeCactus: why?

Amalah: I have this little heated coffee coaster thing on my desk? And I was wondering if I left it on this morning?

Amalah: So I just reached over and touched it. It was on.

RudeCactus: ouch! not good

Amalah: ow ow ow ow. I'm typing without three fingers now.

RudeCactus: you didn't lose them completely did you?

Amalah: yes. they singed and melted off and are still stuck to the coaster.

Amalah: the smell is lovely



Way to STEAL my conversations with Doxie idea. Jeez.

(JUST KIDDING! I Kid because I love!)


you are just having a bad day all around, arent you? Its because the "American Idols" sucked big loads of donkey crap last night, isnt it? Dont fret. At least JPL is still cute.


Heh heh Now I know, if I ever feel the need to discuss food & viking piss I'll IM you guys!

And I HATE blue cheese. UGH! UGH! UGH! UGH!


And those are the wonderful thoughts that stayed with me through my hour and a half long meeting. More productive thoughts, mind you, than I'd have had if I'd concentrated on what they were talking about.


You two are just NOT RIGHT. But that's what makes you guys so interesting, I suppose. :)

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