Of Bug Guts and Birthdays
April 21, 2004
I woke up this morning with a huge (yooge!) bee on my pillow. It made scary buzzing noises and I had to use a legal sized folder to coax it back outside. I don't kill bugs that big...not for any bug-loving-all-God's-creatures kind of crap...but because I can't kill anything that makes an audible crunching/squishing sound and leaves substantial bug guts behind. Eesh.
Today has actually been all about the bug guts, interestingly enough. My poor car was covered in them after our long drive to and from Vermont so I took it to a car wash over lunch. So a $6 car wash and some intense squeegee action later, my windshield is about 73% bug gut free. Splat, suckahs.
And I might as well BE bug guts, because I forgot my friend Andie's birthday on Thursday. Like, completely. La la la I'm all obsessed with my foot and then it's off to Vermont and then what? My best friend's birthday? The friend who is getting married in September and whose MAID of HONOR just so happens to be ME? Her birthday? She's soooo going to make me wear something salmon-colored with big puffy sleeves. Happy belated birthday, Andie. Love, Squishy Bug Guts.
(I just ate part of the paper bag that my sandwich is wrapped in. Serves my ass right.)
So today is pretty much back to normal then. Early morning bee-related drama, work, errands, Amy's special brand of idiocy and then the usual lunch-related eating paper/tainted yogurt/moldy mayonaise drama. Perhaps later this afternoon I shall fall down and injure something or get trapped in an elevator or lock myself out of my car. Or all three! It's gonna be a great day!
Plus, I do believe I took some pictures during our Vermont trip, although they're all from the very first day. Before the trip took a turn for the horrific. Actually, I think the camera was put away permanently before we even got out of Jersey. But Jersey is very scenic so maybe I took some interesting ones. Of like, industrial yards or something. So stay tuned for um...that.
On second thought, I'll do my best to fall down and injure myself in some comical fashion instead.