Um. So I kind of lost all the emails I had in my Wednesday Advice Smackdown queue. How? I do not know. But the folder is empty. (So I guess I didn’t “kind of” lose anything. I just flat-out lost them.)
Somehow I have managed to completely screw up Gmail, the most user-friendly and idiot-proof email interface out there, and delete and entire label’s worth of emails. And then I went a step further and deleted them forever. Gmail users will understand how difficult this is, and have now lost all respect for my technical skills, and will probably send me t-shirts that say “LOSER” on them and point and mock and etc.
Anyway. There it is. All advice questions have been lost. Pfft. So if y’all wouldn’t mind maybe resending them? Or just sending some new ones? Would be very grateful and will make a point to be extra funny tomorrow and not just phone it in. I know! It’s an once-in-a-lifetime offer. So pleeeeeeeease send me some questions. To firstname.lastname@example.org. Or email@example.com. Or firstname.lastname@example.org. Or email@example.com. They all go to the same damn place, because once? I was smart and not stupid and knew how to operate the Interweb on my personal computing unit box.
And then I solemnly swear not to touch anything ever again or try to get fancy with the labels and the sub-folders.
I would also like to put out a plea for everybody everywhere to not order the Skillet Sensations at Applebee’s, simply because I cannot stand the commercials for them. The jingle is stuck in my head and is. Driving. Me. Mad. It’s the worst jingle since the one for Chili’s Baby Back Ribs, which I hold wholly responsible for both mad cow disease and the assassination of JFK.
Actually? No one should eat at Applebee’s ever, because this chain also brought us that jingle for riblets, sung to the tune of “Rawhide,” which OH MY GOD I AM NOW SINGING. HELP.
Gah! Change the subject! Quick!
Okay, so I’m interviewing someone today to be my editorial assistant. Because as I’ve mentioned a million times before, I am extremely important. And have I mentioned that I’m getting a window office? I have? Well, I probably haven’t mentioned it in a few days so window. Office. Suckahs.
I feel weird interviewing people. Especially the guy last week, who was so much smarter than me it was not even funny. According to his resume, he started pursuing his master’s the year I graduated from high school. Yeeah. Mm-kay. Go get me some coffee, bitch.
So does anyone in the DC area want to be an editorial assistant? You will benefit from my months of experience and I can teach how to write real good and also proofread which is a really important skill to posses. You can also staple things for me and let me throw pens at your head when I am cranky.
riblets riblets riblets applebee’s has riblets all that you can eat now ribleeeeeeeeeeeeets