Cry Hard With a Vengeance
November 11, 2004
So. I was all prepared to come back today with Edge and Bite and Avril Lavigne-style Punkness, but then I read all your comments about Steel Magnolias and A Little Princess and the therapeutic necessity that is the Movie Cry. Now I'm all squishy.
Although my hair is once again shiny and straight like splinty hard steel. Will cut you and burn your eyes with its gorgeous shiniess. And I am literally trembling with anticipation for the release of Eminem's new CD tomorrow, because I am such a bad ass. I'm totally going to buy it on my lunch hour tomorrow.
I may also totally buy A Little Princess on DVD while I'm out.
See? Bad. Ass.
(An' ya know I totally love all of y'all more'n mah luggage.)
I have to love you, for you helped me name my office plants. Which was a very important task and you did not let me down. Now, if someone out there has a tape of last night's episode of Lost, then I will make a bold stance and declare this whole Internet thing a smashing success.
(BURN IN HELL ABC. BURN IN HELL AND DIE. Goddamn network made Lost run one hour and one minute so instead of recording Lost? My TiVo recorded a rerun of Mythbusters that started in that crucial one-minute overlap period and for some reason was a higher season pass priority than my beloved, beloved Lost. I seriously fought back more tears last night when I discovered the mistake and these were NOT the happy sappy movie tears but the real, bitter and painful kind that can only be soothed by alcohol.)
(I've already made about five people recap it for me so you don't need to tell me what happened. But still. Want tape to see the bamboo in the fingernails thing myself because I HATE scruffy-mean guy.) (TM Type A.)
What the hell was I talking about?
Plants! Right. So without further ado, let me present...
(Ok, just a little more further ado: I have conquered the evil office blinds. They open and close and lower and rise to my wishes now. All I have to do is climb on top of the heating/air conditioning box and jiggle this little white plastic thing once I get the blinds lowered to the level I want. It's quite an acrobatic feat and I'm glad my window faces a parking garage and not another office building, because footage of a girl in a short skirt and knee-high high-heel boots balancing on a narrow heating unit and yanking on venetian blinds could totally become the next Star Wars Kid video of the Internet.)
Anyway! Plants! Complete with naming credit links, which I have determined to be the prize of the contest, because the Amalah.com legal department determined that since I never promised a specific prize, I owe you bastards absolutely nothing. Thanks for playing!