ON THE BRINK OF GREATNESS AND ALSO VOMITING
About a Dog

Morning After

Amy-

Some of your posts can get quite dangerous, have you ever considered using a stunt double?

-Stu

Advice column? Today? Are you drunk?

Or just from Ohio?

(This may be one of those posts where I should use a stunt double, because it's all politicky and I am not a politicky person and will probably piss people off and get stuff thrown at me.)

So apparently, Jason and I made a little wager last night. If Bush won, he was allowed to go buy a Mazda Miata, which he wantswantswants and I'm all, moneymoneymoney. Also fucking Ford Focus which is not paid off and is worth a teeny weeny fraction of what we actually owe on it. But! If Bush won, he could buy it because...well, I forget why.

I also forget what I was supposed to get if Kerry won. I really need to not make wagers while drunk. I suck at them.

Anyway.

But whatever. I'm not sobbing, I'm not distraught, I'm not shaking my fist at the heavens in self-righteous rage. Frankly? Kerry never impressed me much. I never really got how he was going to fix everything. Or anything, really. And while I certainly think Bush has made an assload of mistakes, I could never get behind the whole "anybody but Bush" thing. No, not anybody. Let's get someone better. We deserve to set our sights that high.

But no, we got Kerry. The most milquetoast of the candidates, mostly because Dean scared us by actually displaying a personality and some passion and made a funny screaming noise. McCain didn't have the balls to break from his party and Edwards was too young and Al Sharpton was a sideshow and blah blah blah.

We got Kerry, another silver spoon Yalie with a connected family and the secret Skull & Bones handshake and an heiress wife who comes across as only slightly more grounded than Paris Hilton. Meh.

We got Kerry, so now we've got Bush. The end. In four years we can try again. Will Bush make some mistakes before then? Of course. But we aren't headed towards World War III or a complete economic meltdown and we've proven ourselves to be extremely capable of homophobia and intolerance and hate without help from the President, thank you very much.

We've got Bush. And we'll be okay, really. Not great, but okay.

And maybe in four years we'll get a presidential candidate who is better than Bush. Someone who is not just okay, but who is great. 

Comments

yogagirl

WORD amy.

we've trained our yorkie kipper to do his "Howard Dean" yell and he growls at us with his fuzzy squirrel toy in his mouth.

it's the little things.

Princess

I agree too. But I had a great wardrobe question that I was going to email you regarding an upcomming wedding. Oh well. Im just glad its over, all I kept thinking was better the devil you know that the one you dont.

Jazzy

Well said. I absolutely agree, I am just worried about how much farther down said prez might take this country.

Shiz

Somehow? I don't want to throw anything at you.

Cheers.

ben

I can't help but be very depressed over the whole mess.

I had a lot more written, but I think I'll just leave it at that.

RockStar Mommy

Perfectly said.

Sara

Yep. What you said.

I'm crossing fingers for Obama in the future.

type a

i did not know it was permitted to say such things. look over your shoulder. is p diddy there? is he about to capture you by throwing an oversized t-shit over your head like a butterfly net? he may take you to the basement for deprograming and kool-aid drinking.

also? mad, mad props to kerry for having the absolute class to concede instead of dragging the country through weeks of bickering and litigation. pure class. fo real.

Scarlett Cyn

AMEN Sistah. Also? ditto all the above.

I would never throw shit at you. Nuh-uh. You damn good babe.

Four more years of God knows what.Ugh.

megan

Thanks you put things into perspective. I now feel like an idiot for drawing an escape plan to Canada last night. It could be worse we may have had to actually see him loose.Could you imagine the face of a sad Bush, he scares me enough when he's happy. Guess the good news is, Bush is kicked to the curb and out for good after four more years.

Colby

Well said. . .

Stu

How did everybody else know to not send in advice questions?

Anyway, word to the whole post, and yes, I am a bit drunk.

mc

Ok, so you are all super-funny and goofy and that obviously takes a lot of brain power, but holy cow woman, you've got a future in political commentary! Not that we need anymore of that, though. Actually, forget I said anything.

Amanda

Wait! Jason wants to buy a Miata and your biggest concern is the MONEY?

*cough*totalchickcar*cough*

And I agree, this election was really came down to the difference between a Giant Douche and a Turd Sandwich. At least the sandwich has some lettuce...

GypsyMommy

Am agreeing with the Queen on this one!

Broad

Obama shold TOTALLY be the one in four.

ben

By next week I expect the "debate" to begin on allowing a third term as President...

Ow, crap, now I'm all depressed again...

jen

Keep your eye on Evan Bayh from Indiana.

lizardek

Now THAT was the kind of post I needed to read today. Thank you.

kalisah

well, I'm going to go against the tide and disagree with you on this one. I think there's PLENTY to be worried about - especially for women. Like having conservatives controlling the presidency, senate, house AND Supreme Court.

But at least you're trying to be positive. I probably needed a little of that today since all I seem to be getting is brooding or gloating.

Coleen

I cannot believe he's going to hold you to that promise. Only way to get over my incredulity - MORE WINE! WITH COWBELL!

tiffanie

i respect your level-headedness in this...a lot of the people that voted for kerry are going totally insane about their loss. it's good to see someone with their head on straight still :)

Mary

Amen, word, right on, sister, I'm down with that, etc. You said everything I would have wanted to say if I wasn't too ambivalent to bother. Can I get this one printed up on a t-shirt?

abby

It is really refreshing to hear that people who voted for kerry (me included) aren't feeling beat down, but motivated. I'm afraid of the next four years but hopeful too.
Edwards 2008!

DeAnn

I didn't think I could love you more, but this post did it.

Amen, lady. Thanks for this post. We need to heal some of the divisiveness between the Bush and Kerry camps, and I think this is a great way to push us in that direction.

Lauren Noelle

This is a good post. Well put. Although, I found Kerry's DNC speech to be quite inspiring. I felt so good during and after that. He was also my second choice. Very high up there.

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