Well, Fuck.
Mystery Solved

All Hail the Cooch Cam

THIS IS THE EVERYTHING IS OKAY ALARM. IT WILL CONTINUE TO SOUND AS LONG AS EVERYTHING REMAINS OKAY.

Back from the doctor's, back from the ultrasound, back with a picture of a darn cute little baby in hand.

Since our last ultrasound, the Tadpole has turned into a person. A person with wee fingers and toes and little limbs that kick and wiggle and a big gigantic head that looks like an alien when it looks right at you.

The Tadpole also sucks its thumb, is five centimeters head-to-butt and looks nothing at all like a tadpole anymore.

The fluids are clear, the placenta intact and my cervix is closed. Basically, we have no fucking clue where the bleeding came from. It could have been a fluke, a threatened miscarriage that pussed out, or a really nasty bladder infection.

Regardless, I'm on strict bedrest through the weekend, which means girl movies and ice cream (I lost another pound over the last two weeks, so ice cream is all but coming with a prescription at this point).

But still, EVERYTHING IS OKAY. I'm still having a baby, and man, it's the cutest baby in the entire world. With the thumbs and the toes and the wiggling.

So I'm forgiving it for scaring the everloving crap out of me, but hear this, Tadpole: the thumb and toe thing ain't gonna fly at age 15 if you stay out past curfew without calling your mother.

Comments

lakeline

Thrilled! Gah! Can't speak English due to happiness!

Dr. Johnny Fever

Word up, little tadpole.

dee

yay
yay
yay
i think the tadpole should be grounded for causing such stress:)

Miss W

Glad all is well. Was worried about you!!!

Stevo

YEAH! I knew everything was gonna be okay. Blessed be the tadpole.

Sabine

Whhhhheeeeeww.

maricar

Hooray for the coochcam and the tadpole! I've been praying all morning! Rest up and eat tons of ice cream hon.

alfredsmom

Whew.Thanks for the update. Did you want to share the picture of tadpole with all of us? :) Glad everything is ok, it will be good to have a weekend where you get to be waited on hand and foot!

Amber

well, thank god for that - we can stand down the vigil now :-)

Kristie

I'm very happy to see that everything is OK and also very thankful that Notify List is working and I got notified before next Wednesday!

bond girl

La phew!! Very, very happy to see this before heading home.

Chris

Bravo for the little thumbsucker!

Anyabeth

Obviously, the tadpole is a genius! Congratulations!

Promise him a car and pony if he is good and stays safely in there for as long as he needs to. And stops worrying his parents.

kathy

hooray! seven more months of cooch cam shots until we see the real deal!

hey? baby storch? DON'T DO THAT AGAIN.

Heather

Woohoo!

smartjuice

Seriously Thumbsucker, let's keep that craziness to a minimum. Glad to hear the good news.

nina

Well, if ever there was a time to de-lurk, I think now is it. That is fabulous news, and I am still cracking up over the expression "cooch cam"! Glad it all worked out and that now you can go back to your regularly scheduled puking.

Nikki

I had that feeling.......that's why I posted that on your other entry. Well, fantastic hon! I'm truly happy for you and I know this should relieve your worries some. Have a great wkend and enjoy your rest time. Hugs sweetie, Nikki

Nola

Yay! Can breathe again.

Also "cooch cam"? Is brilliant, and only you could come up with a totally un-sexual context for it!

PinkStiletto

I don't comment often, but this post deserves some celebration.

Praise be to whatever God you believe in -- good news, indeed!

lindsay

yay! glad to hear all is well. stay in bed! tadpole needs the rest I guess.

type a

never. do. that. again.

Chris

AWW! See, I just knew that everything was okay! I'm so happy for you guys! Grow Tadpole, Grow!

Big hugs to you, Amy!

...And from the Internet comes a collective "Aww!" And hugs. You can never have too many of them.

Lisa

Yay, I thought so, but yay it's nice to have it confirmed isn't it?

keepergirl

So glad to hear that everything is okay.

RSM

Man, why are you having a cute baby and I get stuck with this alien? That's so unfair! But, I'm all kinds of happy that everything is okay. WTF is with your girlie parts anyway? Tell them to STOP FREAKING YOU THE FUCK OUT ALREADY! Or else.

tani

oh for the love of chicken mcnuggets! if you and zoot don't stop with the making me cry already i'm going to own stock in kleenex! so happy to hear the good news! here's my rx: for the weekend:
1. flannel jammies
2. 2 pints of ice cream
3. lots and lots of chick flicks
4. all those sinfully, "i'm-ashamed-i-want-to-read-this-book" books you've been putting off reading
5. laptop (you MUST shop for mini shoes for the tadpole, right?)
6. sleep.

that should about do it! oh yeah, and send jason out every two hours or so for more mcnuggets! (you know, you should seriously start calling this kid "mc nugget"!)

ktbug

With tears of joy for all 3 of you - I prescribe: ice cream + any other damn thing you want to eat (except all the stuff that's off limits to you while preggers) and the following flicks: Parenthood, She's Having a Baby, and anything else that will make you laugh your ass off!! FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC NEWS!

Manda

dude. i'm so glad everything's okay. i kinda forced my friend to read your blog, and now she's hooked, and we were talking about it at work today.. "did you read the entry?" "OH MY GOD, YES I HOPE EVERYTHING iS OKAY!!" lol.

anyway.. glad to hear everything's fine and dandy.

cristin

whew. pass the tissues.

Shana

I'm SO glad the little tadpole is doing well and not only but looking a bit less amphibian. Thumb-sucking! Could that be any cuter?

Rebekah

Oh, I am SO unbelievably happy for you that everything is a-ok with you and the baby. What a terrible scare that must have been for you and your DH. ENJOY your rest ... eat yummy food, watch great movies and take it easy!

BIG sigh of relief ...

Mary

Hooray! This is the best news I've heard all week.

Sarcomical

PHEW.

i got all tense and nervous inside for you guys. this must be the hardest part, just knowing it's all going to be okay. i'm SO glad it looks perfectly fine and cute and awww...

am happy for you girl.

Dr. Johnny Fever

Do they make a Cooch Cam for home use? That sounds like fun for the whole family.

Dr. Johnny Fever

Do they make a Cooch Cam for home use? That sounds like fun for the whole family.

callistawolf

I for one think there should be a cooch cam for home use, or some reasonable facsimile thereof. It'd make us nervous mom's feel *so* much better. SO GLAD to hear everything looks fine and dandy. Rest, rest, rest!

Kitty

Yay! I'm glad everything is okay. And hey, what a great way to spend the weekend? I wish I could lounge around watching movies and eating ice cream but I have several paintings to finish. Oh well, maybe next weekend!

bmh

Phew!

honestyrain

oh tadpole, how could you scare your mommy so? no more scaring mommy. that was your one and only scare mommy opportunity. that's it buster. from here on out it's best behavior.

so glad everything is okay and can i join you for girl movies and ice cream in bed? i realize you don't know me, it's just that that sounds great ;)

Fraulein N

Aw, the thumbsucking is so SWEET! And "Cooch Cam"? Bwah!

Sheryl

Okay, now the comments are working. I'm glad things are looking better. Enjoy your weekend of rest.

Lisa B

So happy to hear things are ok. I was worried about you and little Tad! (Which probably sounds really silly to you being that I don't really know you. But moms worry not only about their little people but others' as well.)


Sarcastic Journalist

Yeah!! Good baby. Or bad baby. I'm not sure which one. It's gonna go by so fast...I can't wait to hear more about it.

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