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This is the Third Time I Have Attempted This Entry, And No, It is Not a Charm

Everything is Okay, Part II

(Or why I don't feel like writing an Advice Smackdown today, part 3,048,273)

Hey, anyone remember when I started bleeding at 11 weeks and it turned out to be a urinary tract infection? Remember how much fun that was?

Answer: So fun! Let's do that again!

And to make it EVEN BETTER, let's add in some painful back contractions in the middle of the night! Because of dehydration! And exhaustion! From The Heat! The MOTHERFUCKING HEAT.

It's been a lovely morning.

And I'm in a FANTASTIC MOOD, what with the huge work-related project that's due today and the four frillion little details left to take care of and PEOPLE, I AM HERE AT WORK DESPITE A RAGING URINARY TRACT INFECTION (with BLOOD! BLOOOOD!) AND ALSO DEHYDRATION AND EXHAUSTION AND WILL SOMEONE PLEASE JUST PAT MY HEAD AND TELL ME WHAT A BRAVE LITTLE TROOPER I AM.

I could also use some cake.



*PatPatPat* And I'll be having birthday cake on Monday, want me to send you a piece? Well I hope you feel better by then! But I'm sure you'd still like some cake! I'm a new reader, luurve your blog :)


You are a brave little trooper, Amy! And I think I speak for everyone when I say that a) we love ya b) you kick ass and c) we all send you a collective pat on the head. Or a hug. Or cake. Whatever you're in the mood for.

Hang in there!


You are so much more brave then I am! I am so proud of you! I think you deserve a whole cake and a massage! Heck- take the rest of the week off!

Hope you are feeling better soon! No fun at all!


Awww, *pat pat*, it will be OK, I promise. Get something for the UTI (I'm sure you have, right?) Those are no fun and combine that with the last trimester of pregnancy - yikes! Drink LOTS of water to help with the dehydration and UTI. Dehydration can also cause preterm contractions - that's what happened to me last summer when I was going through the same misery. And maybe you'll be "lucky" like me and have the Babalah a few weeks early.

Ms Meh

HUG! *pat pat* Water, cranberry, cake, love. Good luck!


*patPATpat*, *sympathizeSYMPATHIZEsympathize* (I don't have a sound effect for that) - Anyway, you're a total champion for carrying a baby during this motherfucking heat. It's crazy and there should be a law against making pregnant women go to work in these outrageous temperatures!I don't have any cake, but I'll have a few bites of this delicious raspberry bavaria that I'm in the midst of shoving in my yapper for you.




Bless your heart. You want devils food or lemon pound cake? Keep drinking that water.


pat pat pat. cranaberry juice (with no sugar)and LIE DOWN at some point with your feet up.
feel better!


*pat*pat*pat* *hug*hug*hug*
i don't have any cake, but will snickerdoodles and chocolate chip cookies do?


Oh, poor you. Take it easy. My favorite drinks when I was pregnant during the summer were Lime-ades. They made the heat a little less unbearable, and I could pretend they were margaritas.


I hate drinking water & have to force myself, so I have to say thanks. I got all the encouragement that I need from reading your blog today. Hope you feel better quickly. Good luck!


Is it possible to send cake via Amazon? I'll check it out. Take care and rest!


De-Lurking to say I hope you feel better--when I have a UTI, I can't even bring myself to drink the cranberry juice that I know I should, just because I feel so damn sorry for myself. Poor Amy. Who WENT TO WORK ANYWAY.


you are a brave little trooper.
keep on truckin'.
keep on keepin' on.
keep on rockin' in the free world?

you're strong and awesome and brave and sassy and great!

hope you're feeling a lot better real soon.


*pat*pat*pat* *big bear hug*

You ARE a brave little trooper, lady. Also, we have birthday cake here at my office. Do you want german chocolate or yellow w/chocolate icing. I'll send both. Check your inbox.

Assvice Alert: Drink more water, girl! That is all.


::pat::pat:: You are *such* a brave little trooper! I really hope you're feeling better, and that you have had some delicious cake by now.


I just called my wife (31 weeks) and told her to drink some water. This is one of a million reasons why this blog - and the way you approach to it - is goddam amazing. Hang in there and know you are helping other people, and they greatly, greatly appreciate it.

Please take care.

Even though your a Nittany Lion...


poor amalah. you'll pull through and you don't have much longer to go. you can do it! and cake will help. wouldn't it be awesome if you could order cake and have it delivered? like pizza? *big internet hug*


Oh wow, poor poor Amy. It is insanely hot out today. I hope you feel better soon!

Real Girl

Ugh...awful...someone heartily deserves some Krispy Kreme.

Or can you get Junior's Cheesecake in DC?


Holy shit. Brave little trooper doesnt even cover it. Physically? You sound like are you emotionally? And how are you concentrating on work?


I'm sure I do not even need to tell you that your workplace SUCKS. If I were your boss, I would say GO HOME, and don't come back until that baby is in school. And oh, yes, I would pay you, too.


Grumble, grumble ... Amalah should NOT have to put up with a raging UTI or the HEAT. WHILE PREGNANT.

Body & Weather, get it together.

Hang in there, Amy. Major condolonces your way. I've had badass UTIs, rabid deadlines, and massive heat, but never all at once, and never while 30-zillion weeks pregnant. You have all the sympathy and empathy I can muster, and that's a lot, giiiirl.


ACK! All of those things are awful! Blood? ACK!!! My birthday was this weekend, I could send you some of my cake? Chocolate with chocolate frosting, or white with buttercream frosting. I'll fedex it. Just let me know.

I'm sorry you are having a rough day. Hugs.


You are such a brave little trooper! Now here is some cake!


Here's a slice of "Brave" cake, a slice of "Trooper" cake...
also a slice of "Freakin' the f#@k out" cake just for good measure.
My new and improved food pyramid.


Glad you're okay, you brave little trooper.


Did you see your DR?? I hope so - a UTI is what sent me into pre-term labor at 32 weeks - it seems the body knows you have an infection, and to protect the baby, it tries to kick the baby out (at least that's what the nurses said)...

That and get some rest!!!

Wacky Mommy

You are extremely brave. Also pretty. i had the same thing happen, minus UTI thank God, ended up in labor & delivery with big contractions. I had started tallying my 8 oz. glasses of water that week, cuz i wasn't drinking enough. So i knew i'd had not 8, but 10, TEN glasses that day. Still, pee was concentrated, nurse bitched at me to drink more water, and i said "TEN! i had 10 glasses today!" Her exact quote was, "Huh. Well I guess you needed twelve."

There is no sanity clause. hang in there. Maybe have your doc write you a medical leave note, for three or four days off?


Yes, I saw my doctor. Peed in not one, but TWO cups. Also had my cervix checked out, which is always so pleasant first thing in the morning.

Blood is NOT coming from anywhere important, contractions were just from the dehydration and have stopped, and the baby has his big old head on my bladder.

Diagnosis: More water. Less walking. But no get-out-of-work free card. And so I am here. Trooping onward. With no cake in sight.


Hang in there, sister!


Trooper! Brave! Amalah! Also? Pretty!

Someone give the girl some cake, already! Chocolate, even!

Hope your day gets better, Amalah...


Poor girl! You should just go home, nurse that urinary track infection with cake, and just lay on the couch with your feet up. You are a trooper. I feel for you! Big, big x's.

PS I was preggers during the summer and I thought I had it bad just laying in pools of sweat and doing nothin' but gestating. You are doing this while working. I would totally promote you to CEO or Big Boss or something. Really.


Idefinitely feel you should circulate the picture from this entry to your co-workers and tell them to step off, but still bring you lots of water and cake. As you are a brave little trooper, I really think they should give you an assistant for this specific duty.

Modern Day Hermit

Wow, I can't even imagine having to sit at an office in such a condition. As if being so far along isn't painful enough.

I'd totally bring you some cake!


Oh, poor you! I know how much UTI's suck normally, I can't imagine how much they suck when you're pregnant. Hope you feel better soon and definitely make Jason pick you up a slice of cake on the way home. If not a whole cake. Mmmm... cake.


No one deserves cake more than a woman who is this pregnant when it is this fucking hot. It is hot as BALLS. It has no right to be this hot.

But YOU? are a total champ and I wish a cake for you as big as your head.

BTW, I did not get a notify-thingie today. Just checked on the off chance. Call someone at notify-thingie and give them hell.

Lisa B

YOu really need some cake. AND ice cream. The UTI with blood sucks and being at work and feeling all hurty and squirming around trying to concentrate sucks ass. Been there a few times. I'm so happy there are drugs to help these sorts of things.

Hope you feel better soon and I hope your hubby comes home with cake. Not just any cake (as my hubby has learned) but the exact kind and flavor with the exact icing you need and asked for.


I can sympathize. I had three UTIs in a row during my pregnancy before the antibiotics finally kicked their ass. But it was of course all worth it cause I gave birth to an adorable baby a week ago today. Of course I must share pictures cause how can I not. If you click on my name it should take you to his baby site. And for those of you who remember the debate about buying a doll for my baby son, it's not really an issue anymore. Dad is so taken with him he could care less about giving him a baby doll. So I guess all it took was cute little face to convince him. He's an awesome dad by the way, I've only changed one dirty diaper all week.


Oh my goodness. It sounds awful. Just a few more weeks, though.


My first thought in reading this post is, "oh, you poor dear!" like I am your grandmother or something. And then I try to type that -- "oh, you poor dear" -- and for some reason it just comes across as sarcastic? See?

Oh, you poor dear!

But I don't mean that sarcastically, I promise.

Also, I'm a big fan of eating watermelon and canteloupe lately. Keeps me hydrated and it is oh-so-yummy.

If it makes you feel better AT ALL (and unless you are the type to revel in the pain of others, it probably won't), I came home today in 98 degree heat to find that our air conditioner at home is broken. Sigh.


Don't they have a vending machine at work with Hostess Ho-Ho's and Cupcakes? It's almost like cake, right?

This reminded me of that AOHell commercial where the woman peers around her cubicle and dead-pans: "I smell cake."

Make sure Jason babies you tonight when you get home.


Tip Toe, Tip Toe around the Amalah and whisper....... Here's your nice silky's a's a plate of's some's a trashy magazine (to get more snarkywood ideas)'s me wishing you the best to feel better soon! Oh, and here comes Jason to give you a massage! YEAH!


Oh AMY! You poor thing, I can't imagine how you are making it through the day. A horrifying UTI ON TOP OF the babalah chilling on your pancreas. You deserve the longest most relaxing vacation ever. And also? Cake.


Does Cakelove deliver? :)


Dyllenne beat me to it, but I second the suggestion of Cakelove.

Oh, and I have a bone to pick with you missy. You just HAD to go and mention the Chocolate Therapy Ben & Jerry's, didn't you?

I followed my ice cream craving hormones to 7-11 last night at 10:30, purchased a pint of said deliciousness and then sat on the couch and ate the whole. damn. thing.

Hang in there. Email me if you need the secret Arlington 7-11 location for the Chocolate Therapy. I promise I'll save you one.


Amy - you ROCK, girl. R.O.C.K in the U.S.A!! xxxx hang in there xxxx


I'm sorry you can't just give your boss the finger and go home for a nap. So, yes, you ARE a brave little trooper. *pat* Just remind yourself that when Babalah arrives, this will seem a distant past and will have been so worth it. Take care.


*hug* feel better, Amalah. We're all pulling for you, Jason and Squishy. If it weren't so damn hot I'd consider sending you cake for sure! psst! Jason! Buy cake for your lovely wife on behalf of the rest of us! Thanks!

Humor Girl

We love you, Amalah! So sorry you're feeling stressed. I'm in your same boat. I'm in a freaking airport battling major panic attacks because of this HORRID flight I just endured. THUNDERSTORMS!!!? TURBULANCE!! ROCK, ROCKY, can I say ROCKY anymore LANDING!!?


Yikes. You take care of that infection. Drink lots of whatever you're posta drink to make it better, and take some good (but safe) pain drugs. And know that soon enough this will all be over, and then you'll have sore nipples and a crying baby, but still, it's a fair trade!

Lisa V

You are such a damn brave trooper. Jeez you need a raise that would equal six months pay.

Seriously take care of yourself- though I know you will.


Here's some cake...'d you like it? =)

I don't understand what you are going through(I suspect only mothers/pregnant women can) but I wish you the best.

-Simply another random reader


of course u deserve a pat amalah! Way to go gurl.
lemme make a suggestion, go and eat that piece of delectable chocolate cake! It always makes ppl feel better


I have put some cake in the post for you. It is special magic cake made by fairies. It makes all infection and discomfort disappear and also magically does all your work for you.
It also may or may not be invisible.
I think you're the trooperiest trooper that ever trooped.
Hang in there lovely Amalah.


Delurking to offer assvice- when I was pregnant and ill, I sometimes found freezees or popcicles to be helpful in getting liquid into me. Drinking straight water is a drag.

Also, maybe try gatorade?

So sorry you are feeling crappy.

Patting head softly, and gently closing the door and returing to lurkdom.


Oh no! I hope you feel better. I like Diane's idea - make some freezer pops to get cranberry juice into your system. It makes sense, especially since you're also experiencing the 57,987,654 degree heat outside.

Sending well wishes your way! *~*~*~**~*~*~

Alicia Pascua

Hi Amalah!
Hope you're feeling better. I totally sympathize, as I suffer from chronic UTIs. There is nothing worse! Also, I work at Penn State, so greetings from PA!


So if I say "Motherfucking" in posts more often, will I get as many comments as you?



Hi, baby boy in there!
I can not send you any fancy artwork partly because I am way too far and partly because I just can not.
I am sending my good vibes of a virtual chocolate cake to your Mom, who is doing a brave job outside you. She needs some rest and lots of fun from us.

RockStar Mommy

You know, I vaguely remember a time when there were a few of us girls with our own websites that were all I DESPERATELY WANT TO BE KNOCKED UP AND WILL DO ANYTHING TO GET THERE and now we're all DEATH TO MY HUSBAND IF HE EVEN THINKS ABOUT PROCREATING WITH ME EVER AGAIN!! GRRRR!!

Summer needs to end. NOW.


UTIs are Satan's little way of elbowing us to remind us that hey, here I am! I sure do exist!

Okay, so that may be hyperbole, but they do indeed suck eggs. I hope you feel better soon, and drink cranberry juice - my doctor said it works. *shrug*


Ouch! You are living one of my nightmares.
My tactic when faced with a UTI? Avoid the sugar (I don't know if it's the case, but I just -feel- like it's feeding the bacteria). And drink lots of barley water (boil water with some barley thrown in, sometimes spiked with some lemon juice to make it more palatable and more acidic) - even though it's not that tasty, I drink it because it makes me pee more.


I think any Dr. worth his/her salt could see that you are WAY deserving of at least a day or two of some modified cake rest. I mean, It is super obvious that you are brilliant beyond compare, but in my professional opinion, nothing but cake at home on the couch (in bed if that feels better, of course) will do and the employers will have to understand. It's all for the baby. We must think of the baby. I'm sure it's well documented in all the latest medical literature.


Oh wow... I was going to post a beautimous photo of a cake, like this one

(which is chocolate with mocha buttercream and I made it all by myself!)

so I was doing a google image search for cake and I came up with this one which. Um. No. Wrong. The wrongest cake that ever existed.


Oh, sweetie, I feel for you. I had the blood thing today, too, only it turned out to be from all the beets I've been eating. Be brave. It's Friday.


Awww. You are a brave little trooper. I send hugs and cake.


As my sha little Mama used to tell me when I was under the weather, "Poor, sweet baby." My sisters and I now have a pact to call each other to hear those words since Mama is gone.


I also have a UTI with bleeding not to mention I am 37 weeks pregnant and working full time!!!!
I live in South Alabama so I'm use to the heat so I'm not going to complain about that but I do want to say I feel for you and I promise your not in it alone!!!!!!

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