This is the Third Time I Have Attempted This Entry, And No, It is Not a Charm
Wednesday Advice Smackdown

Good Times, Bad Times, You Know I've Had My Share

Yesterday was our seventh wedding anniversary. To celebrate, I assembled a toy box from IKEA while Jason was stuck at work until 9 p.m. because his job sucks and that's totally just me saying that, People From Jason's Job, and you can't get mad at him because his very pregnant wife was home alone cursing profusely at pieces of particle board on her wedding anniversary and decided to say that you suck on the Internet the next day.

We actually celebrated Big Crazy Style over the weekend and went to our favorite restaurant where they prepared a bazillion courses of amazing food for us and served me sparkling water in a champagne flute. And I thought the woman at the next table was STILL giving me a dirty look about it until I realized she was mad because she was very, very drunk and decided, upon seeing me in all my basketball-belly glory, that SHE WANTS A CHILD and proceeded to pick a fight with the man she was dining with AT QUITE A LOUD VOLUME.


Did I mention that both she and her dining companion were at least 60 years old?

So that was very fun, in a trainwrecky kind of way, especially when, as they were leaving, the guy let her walk out first and yelled FUUUUUCK YOOOOOUUUUU!! when the door swung shut after her.

(I swear to God, we're going to read about them in the paper some day after she defies all medical logic and gives birth to octuplets or something.)

What was also fun? Was when Jason gave me my anniversary gift, which is so incredibly awesome and ridiculous I'm not even going to tell you about it. Because no, I don't deserve it, and no, he really shouldn't have, what with the baby and the college fund and the whatever, and yes, he is fully aware of what a pain in the ass I am and yet he still enjoys spoiling me to no end.

Anyway. It both begins and ends with the letter "D" and no, it is not a bra.


My mom got her pathology results back from her second surgery. The cancer originates from the ducts, not the breast tissue. There are no clear margins, and it could very well be scattered throughout the entire breast. This severely lowers the chances of success with radiation and drugs, so her doctors have advised her to have a masectomy instead.

I'm trying to stay positive and busy and take out all my many frustrations on IKEA furniture, but it's hard.

We're all very, very sad over here. Bummed, even. And really ready for some good fucking news for once.

Babalah boy? We're all counting on you. Please be adorable and squishy.

mom and ceiba



I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I totally understand as I'm going through the same with my dad. His colon cancer from 5 years ago has returned in his lung. Lot's of luck and good vibes being set your way from over here.

I'm sure she's a tough cookie. And I truely believe love and laughter are great healers.

And on a side note... would this mystery gift have the word "iamon" in the middle?


I am very sorry to hear about your mother's prognosis. My mother's sister has brain cancer, so I know how cancer can affect a family. I will keep her in my prayers.


Oh, Amy, I'm so sorry to hear that. My aunt had a masectomy last year - we all seem to know someone, sadly, who has gone through this. The good news is that she's doing fine. I really think your mother will be OK too. I will say a prayer for her tonight.

And congrats on the anni present. I still only have one diamond, and it's on my left hand. :-)


I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I am keeping y'all in my thoughts and prayers.


I'm so sorry about your mom. I'm sending love and prayers though...


Vibes of the good variety coming your way.

And where might we find the present with no name? Ring? Pendant?


Prayers and good thoughts for all of you. Once you have that precious boy in your arms you will have a whole new appreciation for the power of love between mother and child. It can move mountains. Hug your mom good and tight when you see her next.


I'm so sorry about your mom. I'll send lots of positive vibes her way (and yours).


I'm extremely bummed to read about your mother's prognosis. She will definately be in my thoughts and prayers.


So sorry to hear about your mom. Sending good vibes out your way.

Also glad Jason got you a diamond. I read the 'begins and ends with a D part' and immediately thought "Dud". Even I know that's not a good anniversary gift.

Give your mom a hug and never forget to tell her you love her.


I'm sorry to hear your mom's news, Amy.


Good thoughts and prayers over here for your mom. Take good care of yourself, too.


I am sitting here radiating only positive thoughts about your mom. Can you feel 'em??


De-lurking yet again to give my "virtual" support and hugs right now. Still thinking good thoughts for you and your family.

And the baby will totally be squishy and adorable and totally awesome.

Just so you know.


So sorry for your bad news. I've been exactly where you are. I'll keep your mom in my thoughts.

Real Girl

*So* sorry about your mom. Without a doubt Babalah will raise her spirits enormously. And he'll love her fiercely and eventually call her something ridiculously cute like Meemah, and every time his birthday rolls around, there'll be something to celebrate rather than remembering that this was a Not Good Time.


Your mom can kick that cancer's butt, without or without her boobs. Hang in there grandmalah!


i'm really sorry you have to go through this with your mom. i know what it's like to hear news like that about someone you love, and you guys need to remember that - in the midst of all the blah blah medical talk that makes you feel like crap - there are SO many positive stories about people who get through this. more than what most people think.

also, there is always a feeling that word gives you, that is so defeating. just remember, it's JUST a word, and your mom is stronger than that.

p.s. have fun with your sparkly things, you spoiled beyatch. ;)


gah! sorry about your mom is right,but also.....I CANNOT STAND THE SUSPENSE,what in the world did you get for your anniversary!! am dying to see it! pictures please!!



My sympathies and best wishes for your mom's health. Cancer blows donkey balls.

I want to know why you alternate between the singular and the plural in referring to what Jason gave you. Something where there's more than one but it really is a set? Like earrings or a tennis bracelet?


i'm so sorry about your momma. hugs and kisses to her and prayers for a speedy recovery.


belated Happy Anniversary! and booooo! for bad news. Sadly, I am convinced there is a hell because, for some reason, we all take small turns living in it.

All the best to your Momalah; I hope that in the days ahead you see hope, shining at you like the d*****d you are...

PS-> that new toybox will make an excellent hiding place when you need to hide yourself away.

Ms Meh

Any woman that can give birth to you has got to be tough as nails! Half the blogosphere is praying for her and sending you all good thoughts, including squishy, bouncing, giggling little baby thoughts. And Happy (belated) Anniversary!

ps...know a good/GREAT Indian place in DC for this weekend? I need dinner suggestions for Saturday night (And if I see a cute cute cute pregnant blonde out with some serious anniversary bling, I'll know its probably you!)


Congrats on your anniversary and the lovely new best friend!

Sending lots of hope, love and prayers to you and your mom. Like someone else said, your little boy will thrill her and undoubtedly raise her spirits. I'm sure she's a feisty gal like you and she will definitely fight this.


I am so sorry to hear about your mom. I'm sure it must be a difficult time for all of you. Know that we're all thinking about you, and make sure you all take just as much joy as you can out of everything Babalah. All of you, including your mom, deserve it.


Happy Anniversary! I'm glad you were spoiled because this is the last anniversary with "just you two!"

Keeping your mother and family in my prayers. I hope the surgery goes well and am praying good news comes your way soon!

Jen W

Haven't left a comment before, so hear goes. So sorry to hear about your mom's news. Keep the positive thinking going and know that there are many people who are there for you.

And congrats on the present!

Jen W

Oh my god I totally had a retarded typo. Meant "here goes."


Oh man, I'm so sorry to hear the news about your Mom. Please know your entire family is in my thoughts and prayers.


So sorry to hear about the bad news. You can already tell from the ultrasounds that Squishy will be adorable and will bring lots of happiness to your whole family. I'm wishing and praying for all the best for you, Squishy, your mom, and the rest of your family.


For the immediate blow that kind of bad news causes, I'm very sorry to hear it, Amy.

Poster above is's just a word, and a nasty one at that...but it's defeatable and your mom is just the type to conquer it with grace and dignity.

Congrats on your Anniversary and your bling!


Sending hugs and prayers your way, Amy, even though I will likely never ever receive a gift that both begins and ends with D unless we're counting the gift of being dumped.


I am so sorry for what your family is going through right now. I have never been in your position before, so I can only imagine how worried and sad you are. I am sending prayers of happiness and recovery your way.

And I got your thank you card over the weekend. You're such a sweetie!

Also, happy anniversary!


I am so sorry about your mother. Know that many good thoughts are being sent your way. Happy anniversary, and I hope little Babalah fulfills all of your squishiest hopes and dreams!


I'm praying for you guys over here.


I'm so sorry to hear about your mother. As you no doubt know, the whole blogosphere loves you to little bitty Amalah and Babalah bits so we are all thinking of your family and praying for you. Because you? Are a kick-ass kind of girl.


Tricia Bailey

Ok, I have been a lurker for quite a long time now. But just want to say that your Babalah and your Mamalah (at least that's what I've always called mine) are in my thoughts.


You all are in my prayers.

Humor Girl

lol! As empty as her second bottle of wine.

You're hilarious!

And hooray for the D*****D!!! :)


Oh my god. The fun never stops does it? My thoughts are with you and your mom and family. I am sure the doctors will come up with a great plan and it will work and Babalah will play many, many years with Grandma.


so sorry to hear about your mom's test results. i am keeping ya'll in my thoughts and prayers. it is amazing the things they can do these days in medicine though and i agree with all that said your mamalah is tough enough to beat this.

happy anniversary and we all can't wait to see pictures of both the bling and the babalah!


my heart is with you and your mother.


My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family. Congrats on 7 years of what sounds like full tummies and wedded bliss! It only gets better!


Lots of prayers and positive thoughts being sent to you and your family from Boston too. At least you in all your basketball belly glory will be a reminder of all the good things in life for which we need mamalah to live MANY MANY decades more.


MD Race for the Cure is October 1, so you will be home cuddling Mr. Squishy, but I will make an extra donation beyond my registration fee in honor of Mamalah. I actually can't walk it this year, since I won't be home from my business trip until that night, but the "Sleep in for the Cure" money is just as important to the cause. In fact, we could start a Sleep In Team of Mamalah supporters...


As if you didn't have enough hormone-induced crying to begin with! Geez! I'm so sorry about your mom's news, but I'm not going to call it bad or sad just yet. Many women conquer this kind of news every day! I'll be praying for your mom during this trying time.

Amy, wow, you are so blessed! A husband who gives you sparkly things, a healthy baby on the way, and so much more. Congrats :)


We just witnessed a masectomy in our family. It was tragic to think about, but when the events played out, we realized that it was nothing we couldn't handle - your family will get the peaceful feeling aswell. Someday she'll be able to use her experience to help others. It's not much comfort now, but it won't always be this scary and sad. Baby boy will brighten everyone's day
and what the hell did you get that starts and ends with a D?
A dood? a dud? a dad? a... a.... I can NOT think of any words that begin and end with a D. HELP!

cheryl b.

One more internet stranger sending love and good wishes for your mom.
Is it bad that my first though was "Did he get her a dildo? No wait, that doesn't end with a D. Oh, a diamond. I get it now".


I'm wishing you all nothing but the BEST and sending positive thoughts your way.


My mom had a masectomy 3 years ago - and had the reconstructive surgery. If your mom wants to email her with questions - she would be more than happy to talk to her. A good book to read is called "The victoria secrect catalouge keeps coming" - It help explains things in an easy to understand way.

Let me know if you have any questions.. it's rough, but SO beatable when caught and treated!!


I wish your mum and your family as many positive thoughts as I can.

And although I shouldn't be distracted from those thoughts - ohh look at the sparkly thing - can I see it. Mmmm thing that starts and ends with d.


I'm going to say to you what I just wished someone would say to me after each cancer diagnosis of both of my parents:

I am so so very sorry. This sucks, cancer sucks. I am here.

No platitudes.

But I am here if you need a shoulder. Well, here in the sense being 8 hrs. away but know what you're going through nonetheless! Hey, I'm home to D.C. to visit frequently so that's gotta count!


Thinking about you and your family is in my prayers. Sending hugs, and cake. Also, you and Jason are TOTALLY squishy, so I don't see how the boy could miss that gene.


It's so hard to keep a balance of good news and bad news, especially when you're pregnant. Please know that my thoughts are with you and your family. *hugs*


Maybe if you lent your mom your diamond for a while so she has a something undeniably perfect to look at while only thinking happy thoughts of what a wonderful daughter and son-in-law she has, it will give her moment's peace from The Cancer. (Robbed from Terms of Endearment, which you are totally NOT ALLOWED to watch until your mom is all better.)

My thoughts are you with you and your family during this time...

Lisa V

Yay on the diamonds!

Amy, your mom has to be pretty damn amazing to have raised you. That amazing will get her through this. My thoughts are with all of you.


Happy Anniversary. We wanna see the bling.

I'm so sad that your mom's diagnosis isn't what you hoped. I'll keep you all in my thoughts.


I'm so sorry about the bad news. I'm wishing you the best and keeping your mother in my thoughts... Good luck!

Laura B

Amy, I am so so sorry about your Mom. I will keep her in my thoughts and hope that she makes a full recovery. ((((Amy and Babalah))))


i have been a lurker for a very long time, and just wanted to let you know that you and your family are in my prayers.

keep your chin up!


Amy, so sorry about your mom's news. Will keep her (and you, Jason, Ceiba and Babalah) in my prayers. Hang in there...


Amalah, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.
Cancer sucks. Flat out.

My Nana had a masectomy when I was a wee thing, and she has been in remission since then, and has had reconstructive surgery and you wouldn't know it otherwise!

Congrats on your Anniversary! :)



So sorry to hear about your mother. One of my very best friends was diagnosed with breast cancer two years ago at the age of 26. It's been a terrible time for all of us, and I know exactly what you are going through. I will continue to support the cause to find a cure for breast cancer and add your mother to my list of people to pray for. I think your little boy is going to be a big help on her road to recovery. Take care and lots of good thoughts and prayers are with you.


Amy, I'm so sorry to hear about your Mum's diagnosis. Let her know she has good wishes winging their way to her from all over the world.


Sending you and your family love and those positive, healing vibes.

Trying to send 'be an excellent baby/child/adult vibes' but that's slightly more complicated :)

Sarah King

Amy, it will get brighter for you all, and not just when the baby is born, but for years later the sun will continue to shine. I hope your mother stays as well as possible during her treatment and that she gets well very soon.

Shame on whoever posted that sly comment trying to advertise for free. Amy, delete it quick. You can even invite them to sign up to project sell-out if they want to take advantage of your site.


That is sad news, have my sympathy from overseas.
And the good news is that you are doing so well with Jason - the 7th is said to be (one of the) toughest years in marriage, did you know that?

a proud Hungarian

Dear Amy and Sarah King,
I have checked that advertisement.
I think that is a randomly generated ad that finds its way to various blogs, posts, etc. The reason I'm making my second comment is that page appears to have some connection with my country. What a pity.

Fraulein N

So sorry about your mom.


That ad was just some random comment spam folks, no big deal. I'd have deleted it earlier but my stupid cable modem exploded or something and I have no Internet access at home. GAAAAHHHHH.

(Hilarious how the comment spam always manages to land on my more serious posts, however, if by "hilarious", you mean "really fucking irritating.")


Wow, so much drama. Maybe you should give your mom the diamond? Maybe give it to the crazy 60-something woman? Seriously, e-hugs to the present and future members of your family, for so very many reasons.


Thinking of you and your mom!

And, in a totally unrelated comment, thank you thank you thank you for suggesting the Clean & Clear Oil Absorbing Sheets. I'm visiting DC for the week and they've been a life saver!


Sending good thoughts to your mom to stay strong and get through this.

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