I was out walking Ceiba last night when I noticed a DC United van was pulled up in front of the building next door. And various soccer-player types were out and about, unloading furniture from this van and carrying it inside. In their soccer-player arms. Flexing their soccer-player legs.
Flat-screen TVs, stereo equipment and expensive modular furniture: the calling cards of a teenaged professional athlete blowing his signing bonus.
Even though I could not tell you the name of a single player on the DC United roster, I still stopped and stared and gaped like a damned fool. And those nice young men all smiled and waved at me, which is right when I realized that Ceiba was taking a huge dump.
And struggggggling with this dump. Straining. Wandering all over the place, dropping turds left and right.
Which I then had to squat down and pick up, one by one, lest the soccer players label me as the neighbor who lets her purse dog shit all over their new lawn, but really, that might be preferable to being the neighbor who huffed and puffed and finally managed to bend down to the poop's level only to have her ill-fitting hand-me-down maternity pants slide down off her ass.
Which is soooo not what actually happened. Oh no.
And that's the only story I have to tell today. Because there is nothing interesting going on, unless you count my new bathroom vanity and sink, and even I realize that posting photos of my new bathroom vanity and sink is really pushing it in terms of entry content.
So instead, some self-portraits taken in my bathroom.
Not Pictured: my new bathroom vanity and sink, which is so pretty, even if it did lead to an unfortunate nesting incident last night involving me mopping and scrubbing the bathroom floor at 11:30 pm. (SCRUB, Christina! SCRUB!)
Amalah: Stretching the limits of maternity wear beyond all good reason and dignity since August 2005.
Ceiba the Inconvenient Pooper and her little brother-to-be who, in fact, weighs at least two pounds more than she does already.
Run for your lives! It will destroy us all!