I'm really, really sorry about the Indian food. I ate seventy metric tons of curry while I was pregnant, so I figured it would be okay now.
But we'll just consider last night's projectile spit-up-a-thon a lesson learned and never speak of it again.
P.S. Just so we're clear, I did not actually feed the baby Indian food. I ate it, nursed him, chaos and horror ensued. I am clarifying this point because of the disturbing number of readers who misinterpreted my orange juice comment as me actually feeding my two-week-old baby orange juice, which PEOPLE, COME ON.
P.P.S. My mom is coming to stay with us this week, though, so you can all rest assured that she will stop me from doing anything breathtakingly stupid, like giving the baby beer or drugs or pudding.