167 comments about A DAMN DRESS. Y'all are materialistic whores, is all.
No. I suppose we are just girls.
DRUUUUUUUUUUNK GRILS. WOOOOO.
Anyway, I kept the stupid dress. Mostly because of Laura, who was all, "YOU CAN AFFORD TO STAY HOME IF YOU REALLY WANTED TO AND I HAVE LEFT THIS COMMENT 24 TIMES BEFORE, BLAH BLAH BLAH."
Maybe I could. Maybe it would involve long-term sacrifices that we have decided are not right for our family. Maybhe I am bone-tired of talking about it, and wish people would understand that even though I've made my decision I still reserve the right to second-guess it and wonder what things would be like if I made a different decision, and that I AM A HUMAN BEING AND DEEPLY FLAWED AND ALSO COMPLICATED, SOMEONE WRITE A DAMN POP SONG ABOUT ME ALREADY.
Anyway. FUck you, annoying people.
Yes. Taht is the dress. Disappointing, no? Boobs are remarkably covered, yes?
Also kind of flat. Fucking breastfeeding.
I would like to point out that the little sweater thing was on sale, for 40% off.
The dress was not on sale, but clearly, I can wear it all spring and summer, a hundred times at least, which will bring my pay-per-wear cost down to like, three dollars.
Also, I look skinny in it when I am standing up and sober. So there! Nyah!
Now I must go to bed. I have to take Noah to the pediatrician in like, five hours. Oh my GOD.