The Dress That Ate The Internet
February 02, 2006
167 comments about A DAMN DRESS. Y'all are materialistic whores, is all.
No. I suppose we are just girls.
DRUUUUUUUUUUNK GRILS. WOOOOO.
Anyway, I kept the stupid dress. Mostly because of Laura, who was all, "YOU CAN AFFORD TO STAY HOME IF YOU REALLY WANTED TO AND I HAVE LEFT THIS COMMENT 24 TIMES BEFORE, BLAH BLAH BLAH."
Maybe I could. Maybe it would involve long-term sacrifices that we have decided are not right for our family. Maybhe I am bone-tired of talking about it, and wish people would understand that even though I've made my decision I still reserve the right to second-guess it and wonder what things would be like if I made a different decision, and that I AM A HUMAN BEING AND DEEPLY FLAWED AND ALSO COMPLICATED, SOMEONE WRITE A DAMN POP SONG ABOUT ME ALREADY.
Anyway. FUck you, annoying people.
Yes. Taht is the dress. Disappointing, no? Boobs are remarkably covered, yes?
Also kind of flat. Fucking breastfeeding.
I would like to point out that the little sweater thing was on sale, for 40% off.
The dress was not on sale, but clearly, I can wear it all spring and summer, a hundred times at least, which will bring my pay-per-wear cost down to like, three dollars.
Also, I look skinny in it when I am standing up and sober. So there! Nyah!
Now I must go to bed. I have to take Noah to the pediatrician in like, five hours. Oh my GOD.
that dress is TRES Fabulous. Here is MY dress I was talking about, pls ignore my ri-damn-diculous boobs... img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/reclinalounger/Red12050001.jpg
my bad--http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v171/reclinalounger/Red12050001.jpg
Ha! Hilarious drunk post.
Way to have a good ol' time.
It is a very nice dress. I am so excited that I'm (possibly) the second to comment. Yay, staying up late!
Love the dress!!! No wonder you kept it!!! You look fabulous!
I'm so writing a pop song about you.
The title?
Drunk Grils (just wanna have fun in their expensive dresses whilst flippin' people The Fingah)
What a beautiful dress! You look pretty in it! Sadly, I can't think of anything witty to say which is a shame because yay! Single digits!
Don't know about the boobs, but your stomach is flat as a board! What the heck, man? You're hawt.
Pretty!
That dress? that dress is worth the internet drama
You look young! vibrant! drunk!
Keep the stupid dress. Laura? for the love of god and all that is holy PLEASE go somewhere else. Just go away. Shoo. You're obnoxious and no one is going to see the pretty and nice you.
Great dress!
skinny in that Dress?? You'd look skinny in black and white horizontal stripes! No fair.
glad you *appear* to have had a GOOD time!
Pretty, pretty dress. Funny, funny post.
Lovely dress! Drunk 'Grils' are funny.
And please, for the love of beautiful shoes, ignore the holier-than-thou 'I know what's best for you and your family' uppitiness of some people's kids. They don't live your life and are therefore, clueless.
I love the dress and admire your decisions. Have fun in it!
You look lovely in that dress. At this point with all the interest in it you could probably auction it off and go buy two.
I wish I could find the best job to return to, after having been home. I feel like my brain cells are slowly expiring - with all the one-year-old and three- year-old chatter. We weighed the cost - me at work would cause us to break even with the extraordinary cost of child care in Alaska, the need for a new wardrobe, car etc. Teachers are paid well, but not that well. We sacrfice a lot and have gone deeper in debt. There is no easy answer.
Glad you had fun! Good Luck today, I have a feeling you're going to need it..
Great dress! The "come hither, big boy, and TAKE me" pose is also very seductive.
You will look even nicer with a light tan....
purty dress! totally worth whatever it cost, especially for the husband ogle-ness factor and the i-just-had-a-baby-and-look-how-skinny-i-am part.
I love the dress!
Darling! Just too darling!
LOVE. the. dress. Good for you. Drink up.
So working moms aren't allowed to lament about staying home? Pshaw... I've been doing it for 22 years.
Grudgematch - Amalah and Laura. I'd really want to put my bet on Amy but what if she's hiding behind the big plant 'cause she's scared?
You are SO not alone. I'm a working mom who bitches about working constantly too. Knowing that while I hate it, working is the right thing from my frucking family. It would bug the piss out of me if people left comments like that over and over.
LOVE THE DRESS! and so worth it.
HATE the Laura and she just jealous because she probably cant afford a dress like that under any circumstances.
...and by the way...the bangs still look faaaabulouuus!
My sister has a whole group of working moms at her office who get together and bitch. Except, I think they bitch about their kids, not working.
If you were uncomplicated (read: simple. like some people who comment. someone whose name starts with an L.) would anyone read this crazy blog?
Great dress. Perfect hair. The end.
PS - You can wear said dress to Noah's wedding. Just sayin.
I would never have told you to take that dress back.
There were just 157 comments re the dress so I felt a little shy.
and I am proud of your decision to go back to work, that's not an easy thing...
it's 8:17 and I thought I'd start my day with a little ass kissing.
Love the dress, and you look fabulous, even if you are drunk! Also, I have missed the drunk posts. You made my morning!
prriiiiiiiitty! I like the dress, and I like the pose even more... My husband just took a very similar picture of me the other night. So thoughtful of him.
I love the dress!
Screw those people.
LOVE. IT. Totally worth every penny.
Can I just say I LOVE the tipsy posts. Drink up girl!
Ooooooo... pretty dress.
And I? Personally second guess everything I do. I think its human nature.
This is the first time I comment, even though I read your blog religiously, and I just want to say one thing: Damn the holier-than-thou, stick-up-the-ass people who think they can tell everyone how to live! Just 'cause you're a mom, doesn't mean you stop being a woman who needs to feel good about herself every once in a while. There's nothing to feel weird about.
And BTW, you look pretty. Oh, the envy!
You look skinny in it lying down and drunk as well!
Ah HA! So if you wear the dress a hundred times, the cost per wear will be $3, mmm? *struggles to do simple math* So now, the SMRT ones know how much the dress was. I knew if you got drunk enough you would crack...
Ahhhhh...the pediatrician visit/work day with a hangover. Always LOADS of fun.
But the evenings that cause them are usually totally and completely worth it!
You rock. :)
I don't know what y'all are talking about, she totally looked like a hooker in that dress.
I KID!
The dress was really lovely and like I said, you could wear it spring/summer as well.
And let's see what else...oh enjoy taking your giantsizedbutohmygodhe'ssofreakingcuteyoumustpickhimup baby to the doctor.
Glad you had fun last night!
Yup, it's pretty. Wear in good health as the grandmas say.
Also, please ask Noah not to poop or pee on it.
Because the kid's gotta have some limits.
The dress is pretty and good for you for standing up for your right to have pretty things. Mainly I wanted to say good luck at the doctor. I hated my son's four month appointment because at two months the shots didn't bother him at all but at four months he screamed his ass off until we got the hell out of the doctor's office and into the car. He just had his six month though and he dealt with it much better. Seeing the evil nurse jab needles into your baby is no fun and being hung over will make it even less fun I suspect. We always go to babies r' us afterward and buy him something cause of the guilt. As for the poo, just wait until your babies new favorite food is sweet potatoes and orange poo shoots out at you. You will long for the days of sweet smelling breastmilk poo.
I don't like the dress maybe because you are laying down and I can't see how it fits but I don't like the print either. Okay ya'll can throw stones but it's just an opinion, it really doesn't matter as long as Jason liked it.
It's a great dress! Hope dinner was great & good luck at the doc.
OK, so I was browsing through your archives, just for fun, and realized that one year ago today, you told the Internet you were pregnant via the Wednesday Advice Smackdown.
Congratulations on a life-changing year.
Hey, I'm sorry, but why do you care what the we think? It's YOUR money, and YOUR happiness. Sorry, but if it makes you feel pretty and happy, then I say go for it. -- the girl who has a baby on the way and still likes to buy $300 shoes she can't wear anyway
Well I was really hoping we'd get like an actual picture of you bending over sexy like so we could all ogle your boobs too... BUT NO... you had to go lie down and cop an attitude with that middle finger of yours. PSSHHH!
Oh and just so you know... they have that same dress at Wal-Mart for like $20. I can't believe you didn't shop around... HA! I jest..
I like the dress too, although I hate you just a little because your stomach is so flat. It's a good kind of hate, though, I swear.
Pretty dress, very girlie! So now I have to ask...where'd you get it?
it's an awesome dress and I would totally have bought it & kept it myself.