This Post Contains Entirely Too Much Discussion Of Nasal Cavity Secretions
March 06, 2006
I don't mean to be melodramatic here, people, but I have a cold and I think I am going to die.
Look! I see a bright light! I am heading towards the light! Take me home, Lord, away from this phlegmy and mouth-breathing existence and into the loving arms of...
Oh. It is not the light of heaven. It is simply the warm glow of my new 19-inch flatscreen monitor.
Lesson learned: If you want a fancy new work computer, you simply have to fuck your old one all the fuck up. Awesome.
And while I am very glad to hear that my trials inspired entire dozens of you to back up your own hard drives, or at least to comment about how you fully intend to back up your hard drives, you know, one of these days, you're just going through some things right now, I would like to bring this all back around to ME ME ME and how much it sucked when I lost my work computer and just how many people saw me in a hyper-caffeinated state of ABSOLUTE PANIC on Friday.
And also, I am so totally going to die. Death from a head cold, courtesy of our own precious bundle of infectious microbes, the baby formerly known as Noah, now affectionately and more accurately known as Baby Pukeface.
Speaking of His Royal Snotness, y'all are going to throw things at me when you get to the bottom of this entry and realize that once again, I have posted no baby pictures.
Words! What's with all the words? Does she not get that we care not about her stupid words?
See, I've been waiting for Noah's cold to go away, because while I will discuss the contents of his diaper or disclose that his nickname is, in fact and in all seriousness, Baby Pukeface, I really don't like posting pictures of him with a runny and/or booger-encrusted nose. And no matter how quick I am with the tissue (that yes, I've kept stuffed in my sleeve because I have suddenly become That Crazy Lady Who Keeps Used Tissues In Her Sleeve And Possibly Spits On Them Before Wiping Your Face Like, Fucking Gross, Dude), by the time I've focused the camera Noah's nose has once again gushed mucus anew.
So basically: If you want baby pictures, check back in the spring, or maybe once I reinstall Photoshop on my bitching new computer.
However, here is a picture of a DHL mailbin that has sat in my office lobby for well over a year now, and just this morning I noted that the sign is missing what I believe is the operative word, like, I'm an EDITOR, y'all:
This is very funny to me, as I now read the sign in an affected British accent: Oh, do throw away please! Please, do. 'Twould be ever so smashing!
Helpful Network Guy: What?
Entire Internet: What?
Amy: Cold meds, people. I'm really sorry.