Plot Twist
Gearing Up For Writersblockapalooza 2006

Freefalling, part two

I've been unemployed once before. It was 2001 and I was working at a small software start-up in Virginia -- one of those tiny dot.com outfits that spent a lot of time and effort telling people that it wasn't a dot-com, it had a PRODUCT, and even though the PRODUCT would pretty much eat your computer alive from the inside out and no one had ever bought a single copy of the PRODUCT, we had loads of funding and free soda and snacks in the kitchen.

We'd had layoffs once before, and I survived miraculously by virtue of having the smallest salary in the company. I got bounced around as a technical writer, marketing manager, events coordinator, office-supply-closet stocker and office-coffee-pot scrubber. I also paid the company's bills, but the checks always bounced and I got very good at blaming our bank and promising to "look into things," which meant testily emailing various VPs about the need to STOP SPENDING SO MUCH DAMN MONEY ALREADY.

I stayed because I had no where else to go. One time I submitted a couple articles to magazines and got rejected and hid in the office bathroom to cry.

After 9/11, there were more layoffs. My friend ran a scan of the company email server and found a bunch of emails from the executives as they bargained and jockeyed for their team members and compiled the List of the Damned.

My friend was on the list; I wasn't. I took him out for lunch and we never went back -- we stayed at a bar instead doing shot after shot of straight vodka and waited for the terrorists to blow us all up.

Hours later I realized I'd left my coat at the office and stumbled back in sometime around 5:30 with a mouthful of Altoids and my high heels in my hand. The company president was waiting for me, and within 10 minutes I was packing up my desk and wondering if he knew that I was drunk off my ass.

My severance package was one month's worth of pay. I was out of work for three months. We'd bought our condo that summer -- with a mortgage that we figured we'd "grow into" with mad raises and stock options and I don't know, a magic money tree we'd grow in the window box. We'd spent all of our savings on the downpayment and refinishing the goddamn floors.

I sent out hundreds of resumes and stayed in bed all day and reused the coffee grounds. When I accidentally missed the dentist appointment I desperately needed before my health insurance ran out, they informed me I owed a $50 fee and I broke down in hysterical tears because I simply didn't have $50. I filed for unemployment and got called a white bitch by some random guy in the waiting area.

In complete panic, I took a hefty pay cut and accepted a marketing job with little government contractor. They never told me that I'd be working by myself in a little satellite office or that the "contracts" they listed on their client list were mostly from the 1980s or that my entire budget for brochures and events and advertising for the year was $9,000.

And so I spent a few horrible weeks printing out my boss's email and trying to explain to her that you don't "open" Windows, it's just WHAT YOUR COMPUTER RUNS ON DUMBASS, and being tasked with tracking what happened to this one restaurant that the company president ate at once, he forgets the name, but it was Thai food, or maybe Vietnamese, anyway, it's gone now but please find out when and why it closed and when I suggested that *just maybe* this wasn't the best use of my time I was reprimanded for "clinging to my title" and "not being a team player."

Then my former boss at a financial publishing company called -- the company I left a year before to go make my Internet stock option fortune -- and offered me a job. I packed up my desk that day and left a Post-It on my boss's computer monitor telling her that I would not be returning, thanks ever so fucking much.

I have been here ever since.

And now I am leaving.

And while Rockstar Mommy's Jerry-Maguire-like exit scenario (WHO'S COMING WITH ME? Y'ALL SUCK AND I AM TAKING THE FISH.) certainly sounds way awesome, quitting your job is rarely that dramatic. Or fun. It kind of sucks. And my office doesn't have any fish.

It was more like this: "Hello, I have bad news and would like to awkwardly hand you a resignation letter while making relationship-like platitudes of It's Not You, It's Me, We're Just Different People Now and I Don't Think We Mesh Very Well" and then I got all choked up because my boss -- my completely fantastic crate-racing jello-shooting boss -- said all he cared about was that I was happy.

And I am happy.

I can't tell you a lot of particulars about what I'll be doing -- yet -- but I will soon. I hope y'all will like it, and I hope you will read it. There will probably be some contracting for my current company along with some stuff that makes me tremble with excitement every time I think about it because I WILL BE A WRITER, A REAL-LIVE WRITER WHO GETS MONEY FOR WRITING THAT SHE WRITES HER DAMN SELF.

A lot of people think having a baby pretty much puts your life on hold. That babies and families are what keep women bashing against the glass ceiling. That your dreams take a backseat to your child's dreams.

I will tell you this: Bullshit.

The opportunities I've been given (nay, handed on a fucking silver platter with a pretty caligraphied notecard that says "For Amy") would never have come to be if not for Noah. I wouldn't have had the voice or the experience or the simple GUTS to go after them. Noah inspires me in so many ways -- to be a better writer, a better person and to do whatever it takes to give him the very best life possible.

Back when I was still on maternity leave, Jason and I agonized over our budget because MAN, did I love this motherhood business. MAN, did I want to stay home. We came up with a number. The amount of money beyond Jason's salary that we.just.plain.needed.every.month.not.negotiable.amen.

My experience back in 2001 taught us that living off our savings -- the savings we've meticulously built up over the years because NEVER FUCKING AGAIN will we live that close to the edge of the financial cliff -- was not something we were willing to do, even temporarily. And so we were left with this number. It alternatively seemed (to me) deliciously attainable and yet...totally impossible.

So I came back from maternity leave a different person, to a slightly different job than the one I'd left in September. I'm so glad I did. I owed it to myself to try. I owed it to Jason to not force him into a breadwinner role that he wasn't comfortable with. I owed it to Noah to make sure his parents weren't stressed out over money and his mother wasn't having anxiety attacks and reusing the coffee grounds again.

But oh my God, I hated it.

I will now and forever have the deepest admiration for mothers who work outside the home. I don't know how you do it. Because I sucked at it. I was always rushed and overloaded and running late and tired -- oh my God, so tired -- and if there was anything I hated more than the morning rush it was the drive home at night. I missed Noah so badly and he was RIGHT THERE in his infant carseat but I couldn't see him or play with him and traffic meant another 45 minutes of our time together was sucked away from us.

By Friday I was so tired and worn out that I seriously had no business getting behind the wheel with Noah in the car. So Fridays were the days that I missed my exit or locked my keys in the car or spilled coffee on myself or made a million other stupid mistakes. I was so tired of the colds and viruses and using my sick leave to care for Noah then dragging my diseased ass in because I just couldn't miss any more work.

I had to make a change. And I've made it and it's terrifying and exciting and I AM SO FUCKING GRATEFUL. Because I know. Just a couple months ago I stared at our budget for the millionth time, trying to scale back more and more and it just wasn't going to happen. I didn't have a choice. I think it's bullshit to kid ourselves that all women in this country really, truly have a choice.

Oh, but you choose to live in an area where real estate costs seventy million dollars a square foot. You choose to have two cars. You choose to have a date night with your husband. You choose these things because you are not a good parent.

Arrrrgh. The whole thing makes me want to poke pointy things in people's eyes.

Anyway. Stuff came together for me. Details coming soon. Maybe it was luck, fate, karma, God's chosen plan -- I have no idea. But honestly? It worked out because of you guys. Because you come here and read and comment and frantically refresh and give a rat's ass about my family and what I have to say. Or maybe you just want baby pictures. Or maybe you hate me and keep reading in hopes that I'll get hit by a truck. I don't know. But thanks for upping my stats anyway and helping me prove that there's an audience for run-on sentences about poop. And for giving me the confidence that hey, maybe I don't completely suck.

When I think about how you -- all of you -- have touched my life and changed it for the better; about where I would be without this blog, this outlet; and about how Noah and I have an army of friends and allies (I refuse to call any of you strangers) out there -- Jesus God, it renders me absolutely speechless.

(HA! Yet look at how I am still talking.)

So. I am serving out two more weeks. May 3rd is my last day. Then I get the nifty WAHM acronym and the chance to do everything I've ever wanted, plus the one thing I never realized would mean so much to me.

Swing

I couldn't have done it without you. Thank you.

Comments

Catherine

You're obviously a helluva fine writer girl, you can make run-on sentences about poop wildly entertaining, and you should be doing it for yourself with or without the munchkin, but of course Noah was the adorable catalyst to push you to ditch working for someone else. (How's that for a run on sentence?) This Olde Mom is thrilled for you!

Joy

OMG you are my HERO, Amy! You rock. Good for you dear and WELL DONE. Yay!

Nic

(sniff) Damn woman made me cry- AGAIN. We love you too Noah- er, I mean Amy! No, it's not just the most adorable boy child ever, we loved you back when the most important things were the guy, the purse and the pooch. You sound so relieved, so happy, do I smell a book deal? Shall I go to Amazon and put my preorder in now?

Rebecca B.

Amy, I am so happy for you and your new venture. I wish you all the best, and am so glad you'll get to be home with your wonderful Noah. I look forward to hearing all about your future accomplishments.

Occidental Girl

Good for you!

My last day is May 31st. My daughter is five, and I've wanted to do this since she was born. All it took was a divorce, single-parenthood, and remarriage to a good man to make it happen. Ha!

I'm really happy for you. I agree with what you said. I feel the same way.

the kim half of glamorouse

Dude - you rock in so many ways. This new road you are on? We're all still there, cheering, offering drinks, providing the pitstops and taking in the view.

Love you heaps.

xxxK

kimblahg

no amy, thank you for the wonderful diversion that is amalah.com

lissa

Congratulations! I'm happy for you! And not that it means much but I think you are a great mother.

Kari

Kickass news.

You really are a terrific writer -- how fantastic does it must feel to know you are going to be doing what you love - staying home with Noah and writing.

I think you can safely assume your audience will follow you anywhere.

kerri anne

This is so stinking exciting! And you deserve every moment of the happiness and fantastic! opportunities that are coming your way. Every moment.

It's been so awesome! to have been a reader from waybackwhen, and to see your audience grow, and to see Noah grow, and to see you continously write well and put yourself out there. You really are rad, Amy. Smooches to you. : )

Kristin

Good Luck with everything that is to come and
make the best of it!!You are an inspiration!!

Terri

Super ... I'm toasting you with diet coke while I am quietly thrilled that someone is doing what they actually want to do for a living rather than doing what they must to keep house and home afloat. Cheers!

Laura

So great! I love reading this blog and I'm so glad that you'll be able to keep writing - you are so good at it. It's crazy how things just work out sometimes.

I am a WAHM and I love it, but it can be hard too. Not so much now that my kids are older, but when they were little some days I felt like I had the best of both worlds - and some days it felt like the worst of both worlds. But, really, the greatest thing about working for yourself is just getting to make your own choices and having the flexibility to do what is best for your family.

It sounds like you are definitely finding your way to that.

Elizabeth

THIS IS THE BEST HAPPILY-EVER-AFTER STORY EVER.

EVER.

First Scott McClellan resigns, now you are free to live the life of your dreams!?

Holy hell, it's enough to make me believe in Glinda the Good Witch.

Margarita Mama

Congratulations, you are an excellent writer.

And Noah will enjoy his new commute-free life as well. It's better for him to get all his colds and ear infections when he's older and he can blow his own nose and tell you what hurts.

You guys are going to have a fantastic time together.

Alicia

Aw, you big mush! I'm all teary eyed for someone I feel like I know so well without ever having met.

Best of luck in all you're doing, can't wait to read whatever it is you're writing!

Lissy

I just found your website and I am hooked! Good luck on your newest role as a WAHM. You are so lucky! This piece was your best yet, in my opinion. Actually brought me to tears!

Amy

Amy,

I love you - in a non-lezzie way of course (NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT) but it's love nonetheless.

Keep rocking on with your fabulousness.

Amy

Amy,

I love you - in a non-lezzie way of course (NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT) but it's love nonetheless.

Keep rocking on with your fabulousness.

madge

Yippee!

Sounds like big things are afoot in the AmalahFoodieNoahlah household. Best of luck to you three.

blackbeltmama

Awesome! So happy for you!

Now, if I could just make you plug my blog in your blog every day, then I could quit my WAH job and be a WAHM-writer which would be way cooler!

Noah is going to be thrilled! You do realize with all these comments, you're becoming Dooce.

mom101

This is the best thing I've read from you yet. I've only been reading you a few months, but still...this is a very very good side of Amy. Best of luck and I hope the new gig involves more of the same.

slyeyes

Noah looks totally thrilled by your decision!

Suzy Q

Wow. Just wow.

All my best wishes for your future success. If this blog is any indication of your writing talent, then you're pretty much set. Really. You are very good with the words. And not many people are.

Noah as the catalyst for all this? Is a good thing.

You are a very good writer and a good mommy, too.

Go forth, and be prosperous, financially and spiritually!

cristin

Wow. I get incapacitated for a few days, and you life went through INCREDIBLE fantastic changes. This post is probably my very most favorite. I am so happy for you and Noah, and Jason, and your mom, and I cannot WAIT to see what comes next.

JAB

Delurking to say that you are totally inspiring!

Heather

I'd love to read all the comments, but there are so.many.of.them. This was a great entry, Amy. I love being part of your little world inside the computer. Thanks, as always, for sharing.

sarah

thank YOU!!!! You're an incredible inspiration; both as a mom and a writer!!

redd

i am so proud of you. you will not regret staying at home. i stay at home with my little guy, and i just can't imagine it any other way

Elsa

I can totally realte to the sick leave thing-i have three of the little life suckers and have already used up my yearly leave and its only f-ng APRIL! Seriously-i just stumbled onto your blog and its fantastic-much luck in all your endeavors!!!!!

JP

Congrats Amy... I know you'll amaze us all with the fruits of the next chapter of your career. (Now day care illness free!)

Brighton

Your welcome, you so deserve this!

Em

Congrats Amy (and Noah)! Best of luck with all your plans and thank YOU for writing!

April

Delurking to say congratulations! I can't wait to read what you have in store next. You are an amazing writer, and from what I can tell someone I'd really like in "real" life too! Noah is so lucky to have you for a mom!

Merrilee

I'm so glad you are doing something that makes you and Noah happy!

Jessica

I'm glad you have found a way to live the dream.
Enjoy it for all of us who haven't found the way yet. (And I don't mean that in a snarky way, just in an envious way!)

Julianna

Yay! Congrats! because you have come far and worked really hard. it's crazy to think we are the same age! But i'm faaaar behind you :) I am still aching for the kid and to be with my husband and oh would i love to work from home.

You so deserve it all though! because you have really worked for this and worked hard and stayed the course, you know?

Maybe if immigration ever feels like letting my husband in, then i can start working towards my goal too!

Best of luck! and love! And I am glad your mother does not have cancer.

Heidi

Congratulations on taking the plunge! Your family won't regret it for a minute. I did the same thing you did - went back to work, cursed most minutes of it, then quit. Best thing I ever did. I haven't transitioned to WAHM yet, so will look to you for guidance on that one.
Thanks for writing so honestly. I look forward to more.
Signed, no longer lurking.

Haley-O

Congratulations, Amalah. I'm still on my mat leave, but time's running out! I promised myself come hell or high water that I wouldn't go back to work--that for my daughter's sake, and my own sanity, I'd stay at home with her. Like you, I've been so inspired by my lil' Joey. I'm painting, writing, doing all the things I never thought I'd do--let alone do for a living! Anyway, I totally relate to what you (so eloquently and engagingly!) wrote above. Good luck. I'm excited to hear about what you're going to be doing!

lastewie

Right....so I posted once drunk and crying about a month ago cause I was getting let go at work. Then I posted and apologized for drunken possting. You emailed me and I felt a) psyched and b) touched.

Well, I ended up quitting and MY GOD the relief. The sweet, sweet, sweet relief. I hope that's what you're feeling now, cause it is a damned fine place to be. Muah.

spammit/ anne nahm

I'm fairly balanced between happiness and jealousness for you. Jealhapinations - that's me throwing congratulations in there as well :^).

kalisah

When I saw the little red exclamation point next to "Amalah" on my RSS feed, I thought it meant there was some sort of feed error. I had no idea it was going to be a commentary on the post I was about to read.

To which I would only add:
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

cate

wishing you all the best now and always! congrats and much love!

cate

wishing you all the best now and always! congrats and much love!

Frema

:)

Incredimom

YAY!!!
So happy for you - keep us posted!

Rivka

De-lurking to say that you are my FAY-VOR-IT blogger and I will read anything you write, just list the place. You are an awesome writer, seriously amazing.

And I'm so happy that you have made the choice that works best for you and your family. Just DON'T STOP BLOGGING! Please!

Marissa

I am a working mum and I don't know how I do it either (I guess it's because she is 20 months old now and they don't get sick often at that age). I started back at a work when my daughter was 3 months old and I missed her first steps, I missed her first word (which was mumma) and I missed her first solids. I regret it like crazy.

You are much braver than me and although I can still afford to buy myself a pair of Manolo Blahnik Shoes every month , I will never get back those days I've missed with her. Good on ya mate!!!

Marissa in Australia

Erica

The volcanoes of the world TREMBLE IN FEAR of the new ballsier Amy. Congrats and thanks for making us feel good about being a part of your life.

moxiemomma

congratulations!

i'm a WAHM writer person and although there are some crazy times in this two kid, one dog household it's good to be the one making decisions about...well, about everything!

enjoy!

Jessica

Welcome to the WAHM world. Congrats, and I'm so happy for you. You're an inspiration to many...Does this mean we get an even bigger daily dose of amalah?

de

Hell Yea! I just want to hug you, dude. You sound SO fucking happy!
Congrats!

jen

so this is my 2nd comment on this post because it really is that well-written and well-said. only thought i wanted to add is how nice it is to see how real you still are despite the massive growths in your readership. i am an old reader from the pre-washingtonian days (i actually found you through Jason's blog - am a total foodie and still read his blog even though i no longer live in DC) and it's been fun watching you go through so much and grow so popular - yet you still share your life with us along with your trademark wit, style, and honesty. the killer sense of humor and creative use of the well-placed explectives are pretty nice too!

anyway - am starting to ramble, so just - cool. congratulations. keep on rocking out and doing what you do. we'll all be cheering for you and supporting you along the way.

Momness

Best wishes, and thank you.

csla

This is only the second time I've read your blog (found it via iowadrift) and I have to tell you, I am HOOKED! Not only are you a kick-ass writer, you have accomplished the seemingly unattainable: established a writing career that pays your bills and allows you to quit a brain-numbing outside job to be with your kid .

You rock, you rock, you rock. And I will be back to hear more.

Dawn

Whenever I read your blog I'm constantly in AWE of how well you write and how freakin' funny you are!!!! How could you not already have something published out there? The fact that you have such a huge audience just goes to show that we love to hear about poop AAAAND vomit. LOL Thank you for giving us folks something good to read. Here's another reader wishing you THE BEST.

Melanie

Dear Amy,

Here's the deal. You can write about the demise of the betamax or the argument of resin vs. amalgam or whatever. But next to each riveting entry, there should be a picture of that gorgeous little munchkin.

I'm very happy for you. :)

Kelly

Amy,

You could write about virtually anything, and I would read EVERY last word of it.

You are gonna rock this new freelancing venture. Can't wait to hear more.

And p.s. We now require more pics of Noah. I can't read more than a few sentences without my baby fix. Thanks in advance! :)

Ivie

I don't have time to read the other eleventy zillion comments before mine, but like many others I'm sure, I finished this entry with tears in my eyes. I am so happy for you and your family. I can't wait to hear about what comes next for you guys! Thanks for letting us all be a part of your life - ups and downs - and remember...YOU ROCK! :)

Cailin

What is this strange choked-up feeling I'm getting? Oh my. This is exciting.


GOOOOOO AMY!

erika

I'm so happy for you! And very jealous. I can't wait to hear the details.

AnonAmy

I am seething with jealousy but also happy for you. It sucks for me because you were one of the only working moms I read. Seems like everyone else who has the damn time to write about life with kids on the internet stays home. Guess I shouldn't be surprised. So sucks for me...but yeah for you! Looking forward to whatever comes next.

mirabel

Well, I am about the frillion and tenth commenter, but I also had to say how much I loved this post. It reminded me that sometimes things don't happen the way we think they will or need to, but some other way that is even better than we could have imagined.

I am so excited for you and I can't wait to read what happens next.

And also see Noah pictures. Duh.

carrie

ok, so i'm de-lurking to say what everyone else has said- you go girl!
i've been reading your site for a while now, and though i am not, nor will ever be a mother, i am quite a devoted reader and love the updates about your life and your noah. i find it to be a funny thing about myself to be so into a "mommy blog" but i check your site every day and i even confess to being a page refresher. so, thank you for all the entries.
anyway, you've got so much support from us internet folk and i think what you've done is great and what you do here on out will be great and so much good luck to you!

paige

de-lurking. glad to know that my mad page refreshing served some purpose.

and that last paragraph and picture? made me cry.

good for you!

SprengBlingBling

OK the part about you having Noah in the car and not being able to see him or play with him was the damn saddest thing I have EVER read. I am so glad you are able to stay home.

I am going to guess that the new! exciting! secret! is that you are really pregnant with Tom and Katie's next "baby" and they are paying you oodles of money to stay quiet and birth them a child. Hence the need to stay home and out of sight.

ElleMae

Congratulations Amy - delurking to say I LOVE your blog (your's was the first blog I ever read even!) and I am one of all these people who check and refresh everyday...you are a fantastic writer and obviously a wonderful mother and an inspiration to so many people! All the best for those exciting plans...

CompliKated

And of course, the best part about you staying at home is that all us friends and allies will get all the updates we can handle, right? Right?

But seriously congrats and best wishes to you and the whole fam!

Saron

This post inspired me in ways you cannot imagine. Can't wait to see what happens next.

for Joke!

Hi Amy,

Longtime reader here... congratulations on another exciting new page turned in life!

The choices that women face... it's something I have been obsessing about since I've gotten engaged. I am getting married in one month! And last night we talked about babies, if and when we will have them. And I love my job! I don't know how it will all fit - I want absolutely everything out of life... is it too much to ask?

I admire you very much, and I'll keep reading to see how everything turns out. I think as women we all DO have choices in life... the lucky women are the ones who think the choice is CLEAR :)

BTW, an intriguing book I read on this very subject I read this year... "Flux: women on sex, life, kids, career, relationships..." by Peggy Orrenstein. I liked it because it was so nonjudgmental...

Sorry for the long comment! It's cuz I dig you so much :)

Tracy B

De-lurking so I can jump in to say - good for you, sweetie! So excited for you and can't wait to see what happens next! Best of luck, darlin'!

Emma

I never cried before whilst reading Amalah.
I've laughed and I've empathised and sympathised and all of that....
I've "awwww-ed" over Noah photos and sent links to my friends.

But today I cried.

You fucking rock.

Bit of an inspiration Amy, eh?

As a sophisticated yet trashy, married yet flirty, totally professionally content yet unable to get pregnant woman EXACTLY your age, today really, really, NO really, struck me as a beautiful thing.

So, like, thanks ...

louise

delurking again (can you delurk AGAIN??) to say congratulations and good luck! Looking forward to reading whatever you write!

D

Congrats!! I'm looking forward to the next project, and hey, at least now you'll have plenty of time for blogging, right? Good luck in whatever you chose to do, you'll be great no matter what.

Dillygirl

I can't wait to hear what you'll be doing (or writing?). Isn't it so exciting to realize that everything you reallyreallyreally wanted but never thought could happen IS actually possible? I am so happy for you!

Kelly

SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO FREAKIN HAPPY AND EXCITED FOR YOU GIRL!

Hollow Squirrel

Thrilled for YOU and Noah and Jason and us... because obviously, something fabulous and funny is coming for us, too! Yay! You are a terrific, engaging writer, and I'm happy you are going to be doing more of it while staying at home with our little friend, Noah. Can't wait to hear more.

Keisha

Congrats on taking such a huge step outside the box I hope you enjoy every bit of what lies ahead for you and your family.

junkie

Tears in my eyes as well......though it might have something to do w/ being hungover and how I'm always more sensitive then...I don't know. What I do know...is that living a dream come true? Couldn't be happening to a better or more deserving person. So happy for all of you.

Coleen

Congratulations, Amy. You deserve every kudos, every opportunity, and every happiness.

I look forward to seeing where you go from here!

Sarah

Amazing. I'm wishing you all the best and hoping for your dreams to come true!

Krista

Yay for you! I'm so glad everything is working out just the way you want it to.

Heather

I read your site daily and it is a nice reprieve. I am a single mom to a 5 year old boy and work away from home. I was lucky enough to be able to spend his first 8 months at home and I am so thankful, but I just do not have that choice any longer. Now that he is in school it is easier to leave him, knowing that he will be out learning, having fun with kids his age, but it is still hard. Getting up in the morning early enough to get both of you ready (thank goodness he is a boy), getting him to daycare/on the bus, working all day, driving home to get dinner ready, getting everything ready for the next day, and when he falls asleep I feel like I haven't even seen him. It is hard, but ya know, I wouldn't trade it for anything. Being a mom is the best thing I have ever done. I think it is so wonderful that you will have the opportunity to work from home and enjoy Noah everyday. Because you need to, it goes so so quickly. It seems to me that my Jacob was just a baby yesterday. Congrats to you!! Make us all proud -you are an awesome writer, you keep me coming back everyday!!

Kim

Congrats and thanks for being so candidly honest with your readers about wanting to be at home with your baby and also the reasons why you continues to work. I think other women need to see that.

Susie

First time comment...YAY for you and YAY for your family! Way to get your groove on!

Laura

<3

Dorothy

Awesome summary of the pain of the working mama. I'm one of them, hoping to someday be one of you, and seeing other women I respect achieve that goal gives me the ambition I need to keep trying to make it for myself. Jealousy can be useful when it drives you to really work for your goals. I'm proud of you, Amy! Thanks for letting us all know it can happen!

Megan

Wow, I missed a lot this week! Congrats to you! I know you'll be fabulous at whatever you do!

Chiara

Tears. Happy ones. GO YOU! Looking forward to the next post.

Muffy

Congrats on the change of status. I can't wait to see what you'll be doing next.

Yay for you and Yay for Noah! I hope you'll enjoy your new role.

Amalah

Oh my God, you guys. With the support and nice words.

I'm falling horrifically behind on my email and am right now kind of working like, THREE jobs with the office job and the new gigs and aaaaaarrrrggghhhh.

For anyone who has sent me an email or a comment: I wish I could respond to every.single.one. and am going to do my best to do just that. If you don't hear from me, please know that I have read it and smiled and you -- yes YOU, RIGHT THERE, HI -- have totally made my week.

michelle

tears. in my eyes.

because you're one of my favorite things.

starrynite

Feel kinda redundant commenting after the like, three thousand previous comments, but I'm gonna do it anyway, because YAY, you rock.

Am so pleased for you. And so looking forward to whatever writing endeavours await you!! I've visited other blogs but I have to say, yours is the only one I check regularly and get all excited over when you've updated. I love your style and know that the non-web world will love it too.

I know how wonderful it will be for you to spend more time with Noah. It must be such a wrench to have to leave him and go to work, and YAY, we will get even more photos (I hope! :))

Congrats Amy, you're an inspiration to many (as the many, many, many (oh so many) comments show!

Robbi

I completely admire you for being able to do what you really want. I have a three year old daughter, so I know exactly what you mean about the hectic mornings and such. And believe me, the mornings only get harder as your kid gets older! So kudos to you, and good luck with everything!

Her Ladyship

Amalah, you deserver this chance. You are a wonderful writer and bring much happiness into people's lives. Congrats!

Melissa F.

Way to go, Amy! I remember when I was still in school, the first thing out of my mouth to my Mom when she got home from work was Hi, what's for dinner because I'm hungry Mom, can't you hurry up?! She has often reminded me of this and now that I'm a grown up with a job, husband, and 2 kitties, I don't know how she did it! She taught 25-30 3rd graders for 8 hours and then came home to me. I have always said that I would go back to work when I have kids, but knowing what I know now, having friends to have babies and their struggle to leave their little one every morning, and listening to you, really makes me wonder what I'll end up doing. Thanks for always being honest with us and letting us into your world. It's nice to know that others go through crap and are willing to help and support each other! Your blog was the first I ever read...okay, your husbands was the first, but yours was the first here's-my-life blog and I'm totally addicted! Keep up the fabulous work and know that we're here for you!!

jasmine

So happy for you.

I was just thinking about how after I get married, I'll never get a first kiss again and how I'll miss that nervous, excited feeling in my stomach. Then I read your post and got butterflies for you and your exciting new *secret* life. So I guess I can commit, and then live vicariously through the achievements of others. You don't need it, but good luck!

Please Please...whatever your new project is, don't let it be DC local. Your loyal readership in Montana needs you!!

Amy

I'm a working mom and I can tell you in 3 simple words how I do it: "in-home nanny." I don't know how those of you who use day care do it -- the drop off/pick up, the organizing diaper bags, doing laundry and meals -- its overwhelming.

Anyway, congrats again on the decision. Your reasoning sounds perfect.

sheilah

*refresh*

Nope. Not run over by a truck yet.

Bitch.

desiree

sheilah---LOL

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