Packing Diary IV: Live on Ice

Semi-real-time blogging! Right here, all day long! Get ready to refresh like you have never refreshed before! Or to get really bored, lose interest and wander off somewhere else entirely!

8:28 am: Wake up, gloriously late. Or maybe not so damn glorious, as Noah is in the evil clutches of a major sleep meltdown and pretty much howled his head off all night.

8:29: Heh. Heh. Leaving him with the in-laws. Heeeeeeeeeh.

8:32 But Noah's excitement at being retrieved from his crib? The bouncing? The smiles? The great!big!hugs? Oh man. OH MAN.

8:45 Coffee. Bottle. Everybody's happy.

8:47 Sounds of dog, puking.

8:58 Retrieve yesterday's coffee cup from random shelf on wall. Ew.

9:10 Dude. I smell.

9:13 BLUUUUUE'S CLUUUUUES! I am so damn excited.

9:14 Should really start making a packing list, or something.

9:15 OMG it's the 100th episode spectacular! Steve and Joe! Reunited! I may very well faint.

9:45 Ok, ok. Must think about packing. Must think about how to pack with a semi-toddler-type person wandering around.

9:46 More coffee is definitely required.

9:47 Hey look! The Wednesday Advice Smackdown! Still kind of crazy, that.

9:53 Ok, ok, OK! Will start with carry-on bag.

9:54 Contents are something like: laptop, two laptop batteries, charger, phone, charger, iPod, charger, wallet, charger, lip gloss, charger, compact, charger, charger, charger

10:50 Since my last update, I have: drank two more cups of coffee, eaten Noah's Cheerios, been the proud recipient of a YoBaby yogurt raspberry, emailed several people to freak out about various BlogHer freak outs, emailed this sexy mama using way, waaaay too many exclamation points and various aeeeeeeeeeiiiii! sounds, watched Noah disintegrate into some kind of exhaustified, yogurt-hating tantrum, been bitten.

10:53 Things I have not done: packed, thought about packing, showered.

11:30 please take a nap please take a nap oh my god please take a nap

12:07 You don't have to tell me I have a problem. I already know I have a problem.

12:08 I also already know that I STILL look like crap.

12:15 Nap? What? No nap! Naps suck!

12:16 *weeps*

1:21 I have just put a hysterical, punch-drunk tired baby down for a nap, despite the fact that he is not napping, or down, but is standing in his crib, furiously protesting. Now I am upstairs, ignoring the protest, and sorting through my tank tops. Please don't judge me.

1:24 *wall-rattling THUMP*

1:25 silence

1:26 Um. Shit?

1:28 Noah is sound asleep in his crib. Thumping sound was actually just Sing Along Blue, who was hurled mightily from the crib with his last ounce of tantrumstrength.

1:37 Ok, on to the MAJOR ISSUES, PEOPLE: black pointy stilettos or black strappy espadrilles? Also, is it silly to bring pink Prada sandals despite not really having any clothes that match pink Prada sandals, but what if I get out there and realize that lo, what this outfit really needs is a pair of pink Prada sandals? I mean, WHAT THEN, INTERNET??

1:53 Made real progress there for a few minutes -- carefully laid out an entire pair of jeans and one whole shirt, lined up seven pairs of shoes to stare contemplatively at -- then turned around and saw that the cat decided to make a bed on the jeans and shirt and then the dog threw up in the suitcase.

2:01 I just sewed up a ripped seam in a skirt. With a needle and thread and everything. And I did a really bad job and the thread is the wrong color. I am so freaking proud of myself.

2:14 What, you call that a NAP? THAT WAS NOT A NAP. NO NO NO NO.

2:17 Sigh.

2:18 Yesterday I had a babysitter. And so his nap was naturally three hours long and cost me $30.\

2:57 Am officially auctioning off the damn pets on eBay. Ceiba (for those of you who asked, and I'm guessing your next question will be WHY AM I READING COMMENTS INSTEAD OF PACKING) keeps eating Max's food and then promptly yakking it up. I take it away and then Max looks at me, all mournful and starving-like, so I put his bowl back down. He sniffs it and huffs away in disgust, and then Ceiba dashes in, chows down and the cycle of non-digestion goes on. Sigh. Also discovered Max ate the strap off one of my most favorite sundresses. WHOREPETS, the lot of them.

3:00 Pretty much the Worst Idea in the History of the Packing World: "Gee, I am really bored with the music on my iPod. Maybe I should just pop on over to iTunes really quick and download a couple new songs."

3:23 OH MY GOD I NOW OWN MORE CRAPPY ONE-HIT WONDERS THAN COULD BE CONSIDERED IRONIC.

4:09 laptop battery dying packed the charger already am dumbass shit

4:51 Also a Really Good Use of My Preshus Time: Uploaded about seventy dozen new pictures to Flickr.

6:26 GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

6:27 All is lost. I hate all my clothes. I am tired of doing laundry. I finally got the suitcase to zip and then realized the massive bag o' cosmetics is still down in the bathroom.

6:28 And excuse me, did someone say something about having to go to the AIRPORT tomorrow? And get on a PLANE? And FLY? On a PLANE?

6:29 Motherfucking snakes. Motherfucking planes!

7:13 OH FORGET MOTHERFUCKING SNAKES. I HAVE JUST LEARNED THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING BOOT ON MY MOTHERFUCKING CAR.