Day of Days
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Entirely Hypothetical

So let's say it's been brought to your attention (thank you, Interpid Internet People! I owe you a Coke.) that some loser on MySpace (I know! A loser! On MYSPACE of all places!) is stealing your writing and photos and manufacturing a nice little fake life for her fake self.

Let's say you report a couple copyright violations to MySpace. Let's say you didn't initially realize just HOW many entries she's copied because...well, it's a MySpace blog. Have you ever tried to navigate through those things? Do they make anybody else feel as old as I do? Or am I the only one who gets a headache from trying to read a red font on a black background floating over a photograph?  While the Black-Eyed Peas are on auto-play in the background? Just me then? Fine, moving on.

Let's say you realize she's been posting your writing pretty regularly since at least June, which is when her entries suddenly disintegrate into day after day of cut-and-pasted song lyrics and seriously, if she's stolen shit before that you almost don't care, no way are you scrolling through yet another Elliot Smith song that just perfectly captures all the complicated hurts and feelings of some teenager for whom the fake life of a fake live-in nanny living in Vegas is pretty much the coolest and most glamorous thing EVER.

Let's say you also notice stuff that's not your writing, which obviously means she's plagiarizing multiple people because...please.

So with all that said, do you:

1) Break down and create a MySpace account so you can contact "Claudia" directly and ask her to take the offending posts down. Girlplease. Not happening.

2) Report the additional copyright violations. Wait a reasonable amount of time in patient silence to see if MySpace takes care of it. This would obviously be the most adult reaction, because while it's creepy as ALL HELL, she's not hurting you or anything, and really, it's fucking MySpace.

3) Take Yvonne up on her offer to "comment and go all Latina on her ass," because Yvonne has a MySpace account, HAAAA LOSER.

4) Stomp around in a petulant fit , post a link and unleash the Wrath of teh Internets on her. (She stole a picture of my TIRE, people. MY TIRE! I feel so violated.)

5) Stomp around in a petulant fit, post an entry without the link because you don't want to be some kind of Big Bad Blogging Bully, which accomplishes...pretty much nothing except to let "Claudia" know that you know and that you know she knows and that MySpace knows and seriously, knock that fucking shit off this instant.

I'm just wondering what you would do. In case, you know, this really happened instead of being entirely hypothetical.

Confidential to "Claudia:" There are no IKEAs in Las Vegas. Or even in the entire state of Nevada, dumbshit.


The Princess

Post the link so the rest of us can see if she's stolen our shit to!


Holy crap, it's like some kind of innerwebs "Single White Female"! Did she say she had a baby, too? Named Noah? Freaking lunatic!


Let Y get all "meat club" on her ass.


In a really creepy sort of parallel thing going on, this also is happening to my best friend. some 14 year old stole her photos and is not only claiming they are hers, but also claiming my friend is a fake.

I think you should let Yvonne unleash hell on this brat.


LINK IT! Seriously. From one writer to another, that is so. not. cool.

:: off to search MySpace for Claudia character ::

Watch out, Claudia. Amalah's fervent followers are coming!


i hope you're getting screenshots. evidence, my friend.

ps: don't make fun of elliott smith. i'll cut ya.


I'll take options 2,3, and 5. But don't link her because:

a.) I have no desire to join MySpace just to gang up on some misguided teenager and get all pissy with her and fired up and righteously indignant over a MySpace blog of all things. And:

b.) I think its better not to bring more attention to people like that.

That said I would get vicarious enjoyment from Yvonne going Latina on her ass. She's already there and she can represent the Internet if she's willing...


Am I to gather that MySpace doesn't care a hoot about this situation?

I would be tempted to email Claudia a cut and paste of your copyright policy...

But, Yvonne would be more fun.


I vote for #4!


That is such a very odd thing to do. Who actually would look at your site and think, that, that tyre is the one for me. Everyone on MySpace will think that tyre is mine and I shall rule the world! Well, rule MySpace!

I think Claudia should get her own damned car parts.

(sorry for English spelling of tyre/tire)

for Joke!

Oh man we need that link pronto. I can get all AmsterDAMN on her ass!!


I think you should turn Yvonne loose on her! She stole a picture of the TIRE. That's sacrilegious!


o my good god... a tire violation, just so wrong. what a sad person with no life.

suzanna danna

In an interesting twist an ex boyfriend of mine posted a picture of me… used his ex-wife’s name… and joined a gay-bi-married chat thingy with that information… and some of my writings. Just a little “Hey, it could always be worse/more embarrassing/strangely tire-related.”

Nothing But Bonfires

Option three, definitely option three. In the hope that there might be aerobic dancing involved.


I'd post the link. I'm petty and bitchy like that. Just to let the person know, "Hey, I see you! And you suck! And all these other people? They see you and they think you suck, too!"

So mean, I know.


Dude, that's just creepy. Glad someone let you know though. I just don't understand the motive of someone copying someone elses blog entries - it makes no sense.

Good luck dealing wiht her, and hey, at least it makes good blog fodder, and she's not likely to copy this entry.


I would totally post the link. Then sit back and enjoy the show.




I've got a MySpace, too, girlie, and I could have Y's back in a catfight ...


I tried to find her on myspace and the only "Claudia" in Vegas had her profile set to private. You cannot look at it unless you are her "friend". I might have the wrong person, though.


I'm sure MySpace will get around to it eventually, although I imagine they're probably swamped with this sort of thing. I'm just impatient.

No link, though, because yeah. What Megan said. This entry is probably already giving the poor thing too much of what she wants. I don't want her to be threatened or ganged up on or anything -- I just want her know, STOP IT.

But if you know of a blogger who recently wrote a very funny entry about stumbling upon a woman giving a man a handjob in a parked car in the early morning and came up with the hilarious nickname of "Wankyjohn McPeckerpull," let me know so I can give them the heads up.


Heh. Just Googled that and found the original author. Oh Claudia!


i choose option 4 please. i want the link dammit!

also, what a sweet sweet revenge this freaking post its LOL


First: I feel incredibly uncomfortable on MySpace. The music, the fonts, the floating text, the ridiculous polls.

Second: Would it be reasonable to think she is SO reading all of this right now? I just want to see what she posts next, after she totally knows that you have FOUND HER OUT!

Third: How did you find her??


I agree with the other Megan, although it would be nice to use the brass knuckles, especially after I've polished them...


Nevermind, I just reread the first frickin' sentence. Disregard my #3.


This sounds like a perfectly good excuse to make a road trip to Vegas. I am volunteering as your Bodygaurd/spokesgirl. What nerve of her, plagerism is so lame.


original authout of the McPeckerpull? here be the link...
Claudia steal this too?


Poor girl is probably just so pitiful that she needs to invent an awesome life and stole yours.

But I think Y should go after her with a beeflog. On MySpace, if course!!


holy crap! people are so fucking weird! i hope you get all this taken care of, and somewhere in there "claudia" gets embarassed as all hell.


I vote to let Yvonne loose on her, and let us watch. Or at least publish the link so we can check if she has stolen our stuff too! GOod luch hearing back from Myspace, yikes.

Y from the internet

I'm just waiting for the word, and I will unleash My Latina on her and let her know that "We know" and "We no likey."

(p.s. is she hotlinking your pictures? which, haha, I don't even know what hotlinking means, but I heard that it's bad.)


Hmmm... this happened to me, and MySpace took their whole profile down right away. Have they not done this for you? I say you just ignore her beyond that -- why give her more attention than she's worth?

Obviously kind of a sad little creature, that Claudia.


I say link it. But only because I have unresolved anger issues and this could be cheaper than therapy for me.


Well Shit....

There goes my master fucking plan to be super cool like you...and your not alone on the myspace issues.


I would hire to get medieval on MySpace - not 'claudia'. It's MySpace's responsibility to remove the plagiarized content when notified.

A national news site plagiarized large portions of one of my Desperate Housewives quizzes. CHW got me 1. An apology. 2. The content removed 3. $100

It's myspace's responsibility to handle this kind of stuff in a timely manner.


Step 1. Post link.
Step 2. Lawyer involved. Because, seriously, you're a talented writer, it's not just a hobby anymore your writing is your career, and you should protect your biggest asset - your self.

Stupid girl needs to form an original thought of her own. Pathetic, really, that she needs a borrowed life.


I wouldn't worry too much about lil Claudia. She's only a kid, right? (I can only guess, I REFUSE to get a MySpace account). Sounds like she'll get an ear full from your fans regardless of your next step. I would like to know how you found her though....whatever politically correct/ adult like shit I just typed...I would like to see the link.


By the way, let me go on the record once more: I don't get MySpace, it makes me feel old, blah blah blah, but the powers that be at MySpace have done NOTHING wrong (yet). I only emailed them few hours ago. I totally understand that it will probably take longer than that to yank this girl's profile down, and that's okay.

I'm the asshole with nothing better to write about today. Also, it IS pretty funny, right? Other people get like, pics of their kids stolen and this chick steals a photo of a SPARE TIRE and Ikea furniture? Ha! My life rules!

If the stuff stays up for more than a day or so, then yeah. I'll get mad at MySpace. But I didn't really give them a chance before vomiting the offense all over my blog, you know?


Homegirl, post the link! I think you probably have a whole lot of myspace users on here who will totally make sure she knows it is not cool to steal from you!


I'm on MySpace, and yes, we ARE too old for it. It's useful for internet stalking, though.

If I find "claudia" I'll happily help Yvonne out and get all Cuban Crazy on her ass. That's a lot of fun and helps me reduce stress.


OK, yes, I have a MySpace account...but in my defense, I just opened it last week...the peer pressure was just too much to handle anymore! Anyways, I have been FRANTICALLY searching for "Claudia" since this posted....PLEASE post the link...if nothing else, just for a laugh!


Do you read Secret Agent Josephine? She had a hilarious response to MySpacers who were stealing her photos as her own. I'm too lazy to go get the link to her post, but it was within the last week or two, so should be easy to find.

Whatever you do, I agree with those who said you need to protect yourself, especially now that you and your writing are your own brand, so to speak.


I got all paranoid a few months ago because my site stats showed that somebody was getting to my site through a search from MySpace and then I went and actually LOOKED at MySpace and holy crap, what is going on over there? Do people not realize that using their real name on the internet can be a bad thing and that future employers will be able to find them through Google? WTF?

I agree with Alicia though, now that you are a Real Live Paid Writer, maybe it's time for a lawyer to be involved. I usually mock anyone that pulls the lawyer card right away, but maybe that would make them get their asses in gear.

This is some creepy shit, right there. Let Y go after them, and then give us the link so we can see the aftermath.


1. I agree with Alicia. You get paid to write. There must be some element of copyright infringement here.

2. I have myspace, too. I'd have your back right there with Y and Broad. (Old Chicks Posse! OCP in tha hizzy! whut!)(Not that I'm saying Y or Broad are old...we're just more generously seasoned than the usual myspace crew. But GSCP doesn't flow so well.)

3. Why, when I did a search for Wankyjohn McPeckerpull, did Google correct my spelling to Winkeljohn McPeckerpull? Is this a very popular search which requires grammatical adjustment?


Un-freaking-believable. And pitiful. What could be the possible MOTIVE of stealing somebody else's life? It doesn't GET you anywhere.

I have a MySpace account for the sole purpose of reading my best friend's blog (she's a complete MySpace addict). I just have to go look in that "train wreck" kind of way.


Like I said it should of been named... Moronspace!

Nuf Said!

Psst... I'd probably do...2 and 5....and I'd never link to the scum though... that brings them too much attention and often that's what they want in the first place.


i live in Vegas and thank for reminding me that we do not have an Ikea. It kills me. I love that store. "Claudia" Where is your Ikea? Can I see it too? Are we in it right now?


This happened to another blogger, and myspace never did ANYTHING about it. Hopefully they will, but there's almost 110,000,000 people on there. They can't watch/catch em' all. That's creepy and sucky. Sorry that happened.


Um, yeah, me too...I'm 30 and I have a myspace account. And will be frantically searching for freaky "Claudia". Anyway, I guess you could be flattered?

Dianne Murphy

PLease post the link Im searching like crazy


2, 3, & 4 plus send threatening notes about how the WHOLE internet is gonna kick her ass.


Link it...if only for the (super-selfish) reason that i want to see and be able to tell her how loserly it is...

Sparkle Pants

Dude. I have a Myspace. I'm not Latina but as a writer who has had her shit stolen before, I know I can come up with a pretty good comment for her lame ass.

But wait. How do we know you're not stealing Claudia's life???? :p

Mrs. CPA

I like Diet Dr. Pepper, you can send it FedEx. :)

It was really nice of her to password protect your posts, so only her myspace friends could read them...



hotlinking: she's linking directly to your photos so if you change the photo, it will appear changed on her pages too since she has only copied the image LOCATION and not the image itself.


Oh hell. She IS hotlinking! So not only is she stealing my writing and photos of my preshus tire, she's stealing my bandwidth! Because I am sure she gets a shitload of traffic.


Post the link! Anyone who is stupid enough to do such a thing deserves hundreds and thousands of terrible comments and emails in your support! Post it!


Regardless of whatever else you decide to do, I'm definitely in favor of siccing Y on her, just for fun. Please?

Do you have a friend that's also an attorney? One that would be willing to write some sort of 'cease & desist' letter to MySpace on really important-looking stationery?


Oh yes I would be furious and I would probably do #4 because you know there are some people reading you every day who would clearly love to unleash some anger.
I'm also recommending #4 because my life is boring and I want to see the drama unfold :o)

Seriously,the fact that the writing was coherent and good should have been the first tip off that it wasn't hers. Have you SEEN the garbage out there on My Space?


Totally replace your photos she has linked to with something just disgusting and revolting. That will teach her!



My roomie is an intellectual property and patent lawyer in D.C. She'd be glad to offer advice/counsel/asswhooping if you don't hear something soon.


uh, wow. how sad that she's doing that. pathetic and sad.

hmmm...i would not post the link, she probably won't be able to handle the internets and their abuse. but since she's stealing your stuff she'll be here and she'll see it and she'll know.

god, how did you find out?


I vote what 123Valerie said. Whip up a graphic that says "I'm a Thief" and replace the photo with that graphic.


I vote for beating her up with a beeflog.


Well, you did ask, so therefore let the assvice fly!
If MySpace does not comply and remove her profile within a reasonable amount of time - get an attorney to send a letter to them. I agree with previous posters that you must protect yourself.


Let's get all Latina on her ass... and call her parents.


To add insult to injury, she's butchering your writing with the random cutting and pasting. She's not even doing you justice!

Thank GAWD she didn't post pics of Noah.


Oops...I see Stephanie said replace the hotlinked photo - I'm an idiot.


I would post the link so we can all go leave her nasty comments!! Every single time she posts we'll say she copied the post (even if she didn't!)


those myspace pages make my eyesockets burn.


She is seriously a no-talent loser so don't waste your ire on her (bitch!).

But, seriously, would you be so pissed if she came and removed the tire (and the associated Tivo trash) from your entryway?

Come honest...


I don't really have any suggestions. I'm too busy being flummoxed that someone would do this. It is just too weird, inexplicable and creepy. Wonder what would motivate this....just what brand of pathology does she have?


I would go ape shit. Ape shit I tell you! If there is one thing I learned in college, in the English department, is that working your ass of (or spending 5 minutes, whatever) on a piece of writing to have others take claim to it is absolutely heinous!

MySpace is my guilty pleasure and everyone is allowed to have one. But don't think for one minute that I won't log on tonight and search every "Claudia" profile until I find the bitch and tell her what for!


Can Y get all Latina on my ass? Because that sounds like fun!


Unbelievable... sheesh, how pathetic.

And she stole the mcpeckerpull post from one of my most favorite daddy bloggers out there. That post totally cracked me up.

Heather B.

Y can get all latina on her ass and I'll get all crazy black girl on her ass and you'll be covered. Between the two of us, I'm sure we could fuck a bitch up. Problem solved.


Dude. I spend way too much time online. Because the post titled "Fridays"? I recognized right off the bat. It's Mr. Nice Guy,


Let's just say I've dealt with hotlinkers in the past. The best revenge? Put a different photo in that location on your page. Preferably one that features you holding a sign saying "I am not Claudia," "that's my tire bitch" or something more snarky preferably. She will take that crap down so fast once you do this :)


Okay, so while I'm certainly tempted to leave the comments with her URL (WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE WITH THE MAD MYSPACE SEARCHING SKILLZ?), I'm deleting them. I don't know. Seems overkillish.

Of course, I reserve the right to change my mind if her profile isn't yanked down in a reasonable amount of time. Then it will be On. And I will Bring It.


I have a myspace and Im 30.... I use it to keep in touch with friends from high school.

This is just the sorriest thing I have ever seen.

She turned off comments, but not emails, I let her have it for you!

Im sure thats not the only one shes gotten though. What made me sick is all the comments about how witty and smart she is.

The nerve of some people!


Want me to give her a good ol' southern ass-whoopin? Cause I will. :)
That's just craziness right there. CAH-RAZINESS.


I am so glad I refreshed like crazy - I just knew the second someone posted the URL, you'd probably take it down - but I GOT IT! Joy!

Yeah, I have no life.


im reading cladias myspace. yea. does she realise that by changing just a few words here and there, makes the post, which was previously awesom, suck? she sucks. im so mad. dammit


-longtime lurker-I have to say, WHUT A LOSER! blue's clus and the tire are sacred-I'll help get LATINA on her ass too-she even stole your drunk post too!!!!!!!

Jenny Cracker

She even stole your project baahlah!

That fucker!
She is going down


I'm just upset that she stole your cute little divider. It's not in the least obvious that it doesn't match anything else on her site.

Viva Amalah!


I can't go to MySpace from work ("content blocked: Personals and Dating"), but I'll be looking for that hobag from home tonight.

I totally think Y could (and should) take Claudia down. Easily.


I vote for some kind of aerobic dance-off between Y and Claudia.


Totally number 4....


To alter a well used internet axiom "This post is worthless without links" Girl, I wanna spam her MySpace account. The nerve-stealing your TIRE!

Yes, I'm 40 and have a myspace page. Mostly so I can keep up with the nieces while they're at college. Hmmm, never saw pictures of kegstands before that!


my kingdom for the link.


let me know when you need me to make a phone call about this.


someone else who found "claudia" could post it on their blog and that way you wouldn't have to feel guilty about the wrath she will recieve.

Dad Gone Mad

Hey, Y, I have an idea. You and I live close to each other and we're about five hours from Vegas. Let's drive out together and combine Latina with Jew. You can scream at her and I can make her feel really guilty.


My curiosity is totally killing me!

I agree with the idea of taking the pictures and changing them to something else. Or at the very least, plastering your URL all over them.


I have to agree with Tracey. I just don't get it. What makes someone do that? And it scares me to no end. Should I even be posting pictures/writing about my kids? Honestly - WHAT MAKES SOMEONE DO THAT? For the love of Peter. Did it scare you, Amy?


Oh my God Amalah! Your readers are emailing me for the URL - what a mistake commenting. I shoulda stayed a lurker.

By the way if you want a Pasty White Girl with a misleading last name to help gang up on her, I can be there.

Jenny Cracker

Gah! all of her comments have to be approved by her first.

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