Roll Credits
September 07, 2006
Well, there you go. I am totally sure Claudia will never ever plagiarize again. In fact, I bet we've eradicated the problem of Internet plagiarism altogether.
Except that I am also pretty sure poor, put-upon Claudia and her Kicky Flat Mary-Janes have probably already created another MySpace account and this one is like, at least 37% gothier and contains 45% more Morrissey lyrics and you know what? She's GLAD this happened. WHATEVER. She's way too hardcore to like, care and shit, especially since her freelance writing is like, going SO WELL and she's totally making $1,000,000 a year now because she is AWESOME and she RULZ! PISS OFF H8TERS!
The end.
Thanks to Mrs. CPA for finding Claudia's page in the first place, and then taking valuable time out of her cRuiZing 4 MySPAcE hOTTieS schedule to tell me about it.
Thanks to Mr. Nice Guy and MetroDad for also writing stuff worth stealing. Claudia's blogroll kicks ass!
Thanks to everybody who chimed in with advice and pointers and offers of legal help and dummy MySpace accounts. Oh, and the righteous fury. The delicious, buttery fury.
But mostly, thank you for keeping the comments section at a football-in-the-groin, clown-car fender-bender level, instead of letting it escalate to the five-car pile-up it easily could have become. Thank you for not being all, "I'll see your plagiarism, Claudia, and raise you a DEATH THREAT, MWA HA HA." I really hesitated to say anything about...well, any of it, because good Christ, you know how these things can get.
(But of course you know I HAD to say something, because I am totally Fake Internet Drama's bitch, and also I pretty much had NOTHING ELSE TO WRITE ABOUT, EXCEPT PERHAPS THAT I AM INORDINATELY FOND OF MY NEW TOASTER.)
Basically, thank you for not being totally monkeyshit crazy. If I had a MySpace page I'd like, totally friend you.
Now I must figure out how to make sure I never, ever use the word "friend" as a verb again, and to cleanse the images of dozens of seizure-inducing MySpace pages (white text on a zebra-print background, people! ZEBRA PRINT!) from my brain.
I'll probably need bleach, don't you think?
good going!
I'm not sure bleach will do. More likely a frontal lobotomy, to get rid of the flashing images and midi files that will not go away.
Thrilled to have been introduced to Mr. Nice Guy though!
So... the toaster? Is it like the MySpace antidote? Just white and plain and only serves one function?
I was just out on a friendly technorati search with your name in it and lo and behold, there was your post, and two down was her post, WITH THE EXACT SAME WORDS. I think that was the first myspace page I have ever encountered, and it was enough to make me dig out the blunt knife I reserve for my mother's visits and gouge my eyes out.
Anyway, you are very welcome. I'm glad I could help spawn 40 kazillion comments.
Glad there seems to be some resolution. Being copied can suck, but I just have to say thanks for keeping me entertained for the entire day yesterday - all the comments were really fun.
Weren't they fun? Even I kept commenting so much I felt like I was trolling my own site.
The end. Yay. I kept getting mail to my personal e-mail from a site like MySpace and turns out a 13 yr. old girl in Detroit had my e-mail linked to her acct. I was much more nefarious than you. She can't get into her acct. now. MySpace is the devil.
Brain Bleach!!!!
I have that toaster. It is awesome. It makes up for all the sucky toasters I've ever had in my life. Love the bagel feature too.
I was just about to write to you and tell you that goth-chick "Claudia" has left the building. Not before, naturally, calling me a FAT BITCH with NO LIFE in response to my "stop plagiarizing" comment. Hmmm...way to use your words, Claudia.
In any case - your 300+ comment made me realize that if you really wanted to Internet-Stalk or terrorize someone, having Amalah on your side is the way to go! Not that I'd ever thought about that...
woman. this shit happened to me before. some gamer.. SOME GAMER CHICK took all my pics and my name and was me. PLAYING VIDEO GAMES. ONLINE. as ME.
anyone who has a clue knows that bitch wasn't me. and apparently, someone did. and they told me. and i had the lying whore killed. not really.
It was kind of an awesome "Interactive Amalah" post--I feel like we've maybe gotten to the next level. The one where you get to save the princess. Yay!
All I can say is she had good taste in bloggers, despite her lack of ethics.
Very nice toaster, by the way. I got a new toaster for Christmas, a new dishwasher with the tax return, a vacuum for Mother's Day and a super heavy-duty KitchenAid for my birthday. Now a new refrigerator is all I ask. That and maybe a good mop.
I LOVED the comments yesterday, but only because people kept saying my name.
Now, about that toaster. Was it really necessary to bring it up, with it's FORTY DOLLAR price tag? I could never be fwenz with someone who spends THAT much money on a toaster and then BRAGS ABOUT IT on The Internet.
I'm going to start a website to talk about you and your toaster!1111111!!!!!!!
Sidebar note -- Only a horrible monster would hire a plaigarizing Goth nanny, who also listens to Hanson, to care for their preshus baby.
Perfectly delicious boy child,Posh toaster, posts copied by little girls. Tire inside the house.( I'm english and I so want to write Tyre because that's how it spelled, would hate for all your american readers to think I was completely dim though, tire it is)300 comments?? You just like showing off really don't you? Some people have it all. Can I be you please?
I'm so glad that site is down because I really was starting to dislike that dingo and her stupid-ugly graphics. But I was enjoying feeling the love and Amalah protectiveness amongst us. Everybody now, "You just call/out my name/and you know/wherever I aaaaaaaaaaaam..."
That's my toaster! Why must you plagiarize my toaster?
I'm glad the situation has been resolved though, if for no other reason than google is going to brand me an idiot for repeated checking the spelling of plagiarism (it just doesn't look right!)
Yeah All hail the Amalah followers!
40 dollars for a toaster? I hope that it makes good toast.
Yeah All hail the Amalah followers!
40 dollars for a toaster? I hope that it makes good toast.
you love your toaster, i love my new hard drive... whatevs.
Since I turned 30 last year, I've welcomed others who've turned 30 with the consolation that "when you're 30, you don't have to have a MySpace page!" It never fails to bring cheer to the aging process.
You don't really have readers, per se.... more like thousands of vigilantes out for justice.
Behold..... don't piss off the violent hordes of Amalah's blog. LOL.
So, would you say Claudia's MySpace account is . . . TOAST??
OMG Jenny! Hee. Taht was the worst (read: funniest) pun ever!
So glad the saga ended well - I believe this was the first time that I actually read all 300 comments on a page. Some of you are very funny!
Thanks for being so worthy of the plagiarizing, Amalah!
:)
Yes. Bleach. Clorox's Spring-scented version...or something equally capable of taking you to an olfactory happy place whilst cleansing your memory of the stain that is anything reminding you of Claudia.
I'm glad she was shut down so quickly. I also found it amusing that so many were willing to out themselves as myspacers to come to your assistance!
And do I have a myspace....oh lordy yes, I do.
Nobody tells you that even plagiarizing Goth nannies like listening to Hanson.
(Thanks for the mix CD, Frema! Lila Nobody Because I Don't Have Any Real Friends! OMG!)
And for the first time EVAH Amalah made me pee my damn pants. At work.
That person's blogroll was too good to have come from an 18 year old. I bet mizz thang was not 18 much less maybe not even female. Could someone fedex some pants to my damn desk now? Thank you. *the shame*
Yay! And there was much rejoycing! Trumpets sound. Confetti blasts abound. And so on.
I'm oddly ecstatic that this little mess got cleaned up so quickly. Amalah lovers unite!
I borrowed the phrase "totally Fake Internet Drama's bitch" for my myspace headline but only temporarily because it was perfect for the stupid bullshit drama thing I got myself into somehow. (Fucking Myspace!) I'll give it back when I'm finished, I promise. For the record, I've borrowed "Oh helllll no. Except yes!" from you because that shit is just funny. I'll totally credit you and link to your site if you like. Just wanna be straight-up with you.
Also, an interesting dynamic occurs when you're sitting on the couch on a Sunday morning reading about Amalah's tire and your boyfriend asks why you're laughing and you have to come up with an answer that doesn't sound like you're reading the blogs of NASCAR wives, because you know, saying, "Oh this girl has a tire in her foyer..." will earn you the look of concern for your sanity. You try explaining it! Oh wait, you're actually living it. Nevermind.
Damn. Now what are we going to do? I'm bored.
You know, there are many times I read someone's blog and think "Man, that's exactly what I was thinking." But you know what? I don't cut and paste it and change the name or shoe description and call it my own. That's wrong. Wrong like we learned in sixth grade English class wrong.
You handled it like a champ, Amy! Not likely many of us would have been as classy!!!
Glad the drama is all over. Though, boy, it was fun while it lasted. I think I got repetitive strain injury from all the refreshing I did yesterday. What? I'm a student and don't start back to uni for another month. Do I look like I have better things to do than repeatedly refresh, refresh, refresh? Lol.
Amalah, you rock. You kick major butt. We love you! And we will fight crazed MySpace teenage goth plagiarists for you anytime, honey!
Myspace continues to baffle me. I found out the girl in my office has a myspace page, and I told her I didn't like them because they were all so "busy." And she said, "Oh, they don't have to be busy and flashy - here, look at mine, it's nice!" And she proceeded to show me this hideous blog with graphics in the background that caused you to not be able to read the text, etc. What is wrong with these kids today?
Yesterday's comments were highly amusing, and I am glad the overwhelming powers of the Amalah readers helped to shut Claudia down.
(The new "nobody tells you" is freaking hilarious!)
You have my toaster and the bagel feature is nice. Enjoyed the whackedy-drama and it had a fast paced interactive quality. I think we all enjoyed joining in (perhaps too much) You should think up another game for us to play.
This whole ordeal kept me entertained all day long yesterday and increased my web traffic by 900% how sad is that? Seriously I love your page and now, I too shall steal it
Huzzah! But the real question that I have that hasn't been answered yet is...
Who went to Arby's today? Let me see your hands.
Seconding erin rae - I also found Mr. Nice Guy due to all this MySpaceOddity! So, cool in the end, sucky up till then.
I have to think that Claudia is something like Hope. It's just funnier that way.
Also, your toaster has nothing on my coffee maker. :P I'd link that, but JI'm not that kind of blogger ;)
Mmm...delicious, buttery fury...*drool*
I think it's incredibly rude of you to just post a link to your new toaster. You should really post a picture of it so that someone can post it to their own blog.
I'm glad it was taken care of quickly. Behold the power of the internet!
I learned a couple things yesterday.
1) There are at least 37 reasons not to have a mySpace account and Claudia is only one of them.
2) Amalah's peeps, they scare me, with their Samuel L Jackson great vengeance and furious (delicious, buttery) anger.
oh, and um, when I click the link to that toaster it's $50, not $40. HAH! Even teh interwebnet knows when it crosses the Connecticut border to jack prices.
I am glad your ordeal is over. And, it's refreshing to know that MySpace took it seriously and handled it so fast. Nice toaster BTW. Looking forward to many bagel and bread stories as only you can tell them!
For the first time, I (lurker) actually read all the comments you received on "Claudia", one word. Wackjob!
Lucky for her (or maybe Y) you didn't sic Y on her ass!
All hail the mighty power of Amahlites. Amalahtarians?
I know I have a MySpace account but I could not for the life of me remember what the logon was. This is how I know I am too old for MySpace.
More Fake Internet Drama, please. And a side of toast.
Mmmmm, toast . . . .
Like totally.
I knew MySpace would do something once they figured out the loyal Amalah readers were ready to defend their leader's honor in any way, shape, or form.
And Mrs. CPA totally rocks my world.
But wait, what in the hell am I going to do for drama until Grey's Anatomy starts back? Seriously.
I know two people (you being one of the two) who have their very own serious-will-kick-haters-in-the-gonads type followings. It's amazing the power a few hundred (or thousand) people have. And even more amazing that your particular brand of followers come up with 24 hours worth of entertaining comments to keep me boredom free for a day.
I have spilled the TrUe H0llyw00d St0ry of the MySpace thief, to the tune of the Brady Bunch song, no less.
Oh thanks everyone. I shoo'd Claudia out of an Ivillage board I frequent (land of Trolls and other evil innerwebnet oddities) and now she's gonna come back. She was so quiet for a while.
And Suebob? I think we're called Amalahmadingdongs.
Oh, and for $40, that toaster better do windows.
At least you didn't get one of those Yuppie-Bait toasters that both toasts your bread AND poachese your eggs!!
*Yuppie-Bait...noun...any totally useless device that's bigger than a breadbox, costs more than $25 and seperates Yuppies from their retirement account.*