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October 2006
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December 2006

I should not be allowed out of the house without adult supervision.

EVER. Also maybe a helmet. I wish I could tell you that this: ...was further evidence that I am simply some poor hapless guppy caught up in the powerful circular flush of the universe, but the boring truth is I simply make very bad decisions regarding shopping carts. There was a brief moment, right as the bag ripped and sent my groceries spilling out across the sidewalk, right as I caught the eyes of the woman who saw what happened and then BOLTED into the nearest Pier One, right as I dove for the back of Noah's shirt to prevent him from dashing out into traffic, when I honestly thought that if I just waited there a few minutes, SOMEONE would pop out with a hidden camera and some release forms, and I was deeply comforted by the thought of not signing those release forms and suing the shit out... Read more →