Only the Author of This Website Could Turn a Head Cold Into a Three-Day Baby-Snot Crisis
Dog Makhani

In a Word: Uhh.

So hi! Hey. Look at me! Typing words. Words that say things. Whoa.

Many apologies for the lack of posting. It's just that...and then the...thing...with the place...


Okay, I have no absolutely no excuse. Well, absolutely no excuse other than skull-fucking laziness. And possibly the move on Monday.* But since I already confessed to hiring the movers to pack everything, you know I'm not frantically wrapping my dishes in newspaper and huffing the Sharpies. I'm just...making a lot of phone calls? Looking at furniture catalogs? Sitting on the couch with my feet up, watching Arrested Development reruns while a line of drool rolls down my chin?

We're officially in a weird, boring sort of pre-move limbo.  I don't want to go grocery shopping because I'm sure a lot of stuff in the fridge will end up getting tossed. I don't want to go Christmas shopping because we'll just have to move everything. I don't want to put all the laundry away because WHATEVER, just shove the piles in some trash bags and be done with it. I don't want to vacuum because we'll be getting the area rugs and carpet** professionally cleaned at the new house. I don't want to clean the bathroom because it's not my fucking problem anymore.

Oh, and I don't want to update my blog because I'm not sure when our new Internet access will be set up in the new house next week and I don't want y'all to get spoiled. I'm just trying to prepare you! I slack because I care!

Bleh. This is boring. Let's look at some photos of a toddler in some stripey grampa pajamas.


(Yes, he did leave the iron on, now that he thinks good and hard about it.)


(Improving his essential-for-life bead-pushing skills.)


(He does have a crib. Sometimes we even let him sleep there.)


(Missie called this Noah's "Toddler Owen Wilson hair" in the comments last week and I have been stealing that description ever since.)


(Ever-so-helpfully replacing the lens cap.)

*MONDAY. My head just exploded typing that.
**I still hate the fucking carpet.



I was about to come and beg you for the love of god to wriiiiiiteeeee.

The move will be fine! I'm really quite impressed with your calmness.



LOVE the pjs! He's getting so big.

And Monday? I thought we had like, 20 days or something. Monday? Really?

And also, what's that ripped brick think on the wall behind Noah in the bead pic? Ripped wall paper? Funky art? Who the f**k cares? Just curious.

heather b (the other one)

the lens cap picture is very "excuse me, paparazzi, you'll not be photoing me this fine day."

Anne Glamore

What is it about boys sleeping on the floor? One of mine tried to sleep in front of the refrigerator for months.

Glad it's not just me!

Good luck on the move.


Good luck on the move. Hope it goes fast and smooth. Love Noah's PJs! He is so gosh darn cute.


I have to ask...Where did you get those pajamas? They're adorable!


Love that first pic of Noah...that's the same look I used to get on my face during Algebra. Whaaaa?

The PJs and Owen Wilson-esque hair are too cute. Women would kill for hair that color!


Hope your move goes better than my last one did... one of the movers showed up drunk and was all "Man, I was sooooo wasted last night. I got in at about 6:00AM, got a half hour of sleep. But when I saw that moving truck, I sobered right up." Yeah. Right.


I feel you on the limbo. We just moved into our house the Saturday before last, and I have to say that I haven't been that much more productive on the flip side of it: still no groceries, still no Christmas presents, still crap in boxes everywhere. But my boxes are in the correct rooms, so that's a start, right?


So, are you paying me royalties for that description, hmmmm? No? I didn't think so, but it was worth a shot.

If I didn't already have a toddler/lemur/crackaddict person running around my house, those pics of Noah would send my ovaries into overdrive. I just want to give him big ole smushy kisses.

So glad to see he got a cameo role in the Golden Girls come back movie.


Monday? Eek! I'm still so with you on the movers/hiring someone to pack for you thing. It's awesome. I haven't done grocery shopping or Christmas shopping in a couple of weeks and I don't even have moving as an excuse. I think I win in the lazy contest.

Amy H.

well thank goodness you posted something. I have been back and forth to your blog all week. geesh. Because the last time, Noah was still a little sick but getting better. and then nothing. so I was thinking he took a turn for the worse and you were busy caring for him at the hospital. seriously, the crazy places my brain goes...


I always wondered if kids played with those bead and wire contraptions.


yes, where are those pj's from b/c they are sooooo cute!!


What is it with toddlers and the bead pushing? Michael loves that toy also. I think it prepares them for fractions.

And, call Empire, get laminate. Comvince Jason that when Noah spits up, or when potty training him, you will save so much money on carpet cleaning. The laminate only needs swifer!


Since you won't have internet for a while, is is possible to send out letters to each of us. Just to let us know how things are. I know you have my address. Or maybe not since I never received a real live thank-you card!! :-) (Of which I totally forgot about until just now)

I wish you a very successful move.

Silly Hily

Monday? Wow.
Good luck getting all of your Christmas shopping done after that. At least you have a good, valid reason to put it of. Me? Not so much.


Those pjs are awesome! I bought my toddler boy some grandpa style Thomas the Tank Engine pjs for Christmas & cannot wait to see them on!!! What's with us mothers?

Good luck with the movin. Christmas in your new home will be fantastic!!


I hate carpet also. I know that packing limbo - this is when you spend your days shopping for your new house. I wish- Oh, the mortgage!

Want something to do? You are welcome to meet up with me and my friend and our toddler sons at the White Flint train tomorrow.

Have a good move!


Just bite the bullet and replace the carpet ASAP! We moved into our house last Spring and I HATED the carpet too. We lived with it for 6 months and then I could take it no more - we replaced it. I wish we had done it before we moved in though - much less hassle.


All Noah needs is a gold rope chain and a fedora and he'd be the perfect model for a Baby Pimp clothing line. Just in time for the holidays!


I love his pajamas!! So stinking cute. What is it with toddlers and laying on the floor? Mine has been doing that a lot lately.

I hear you on the carpet. If your's is shedding as much as mine is right now you'd have to vacuum it every single day to keep up. Who has the energy for that? I told you that PB carpet sucks. Its pretty but it doesn't stay pretty.

Heather B.

YES! You showed the pajamas! And they are in fact new grandpa pj's. Which makes me a little giddy. And guess who will be getting more grandpa pj's for Christmas???


Those grandpa pj's are just too freakin' cute.. and is it sad that I have a pair JUST like 'em?

Sadly, my hair isn't as wonderfully tousled as Noah's in the morning.. it's just messy.

Hoping all this moving stuff goes smashingly.


Your back! YAY! When you don't post it's like, I have to work or something. ugh.


oh man, those pajamas are awesome. And the hair! OWEN WILSON HAIR. HAAAAAA.

God, I'm easily amused today. That rocks.


It's so crazy how babies clothes can make them look so different. Last week sick Noah in his sweats and tossled hair still looked like such a baby, and now in his gran-pappy pjs and much less "sick, leave me alone" hairdo, he looks so much older.

Our 7-month old Owen vascilates between chunky monkey (when daddy dresses him in frumpy comfy pants) or stylin studly baby (when mommy dresses him of course).

Good luck on the move . . . and it's good that you're not shopping now cause you'll find way too many excuses to spend your life savings at Target on stupid crap like trash cans and little bins that you actually think you'll keep shit in once you get into the new place.


His pj's are so damn cute!!!! His hair! Wow, what a cutie patootie! Glad to hear from you, I figured that you'd moved and didn't have internet, now we just have to wait it out till you're life is back in order!

Mama Snee

Same question about the brick/ plaster thing on the wall. Not that it's your fucking problem anymore. just wondering.

And I love the PJs. Happy move.


So cute! Looks like Noah feels better...YAY! And I'm also gonna need to know where I can get some of those grandpa PJs, my nephew Braden who is a couple of weeks older than Noah would be preshus in those!


Noah! So freakin cute. Love the pj's . Good luck with the move.


I'm sorry, what? I've been distracted by Britney. And her enormous boobs. And praying that she'll start wearing panties again. And that she'll stop dating these fugly guys. What is wrong with her? And why am I obsessing?

On to other subjects.


Huh. I feel like my brain is empty. And I'm not even in limbo, like you!

Ooooh! The limbo. When I was younger, I loved doing the limbo on rollerskates.

(See? Empty.)


LUVRE Noah's Grandpa PJs.

Good luck with the move.


pfft mine sleeps in his closet, or his toy box, some days under his bed, but in the bed? NEVER

Naughty Heather

What a cutie!

My 2 1/2 year old has yet to spend a night in her room since we moved her out of her crib 18 months ago (since she was CLIMBING OUT OF IT) I feel ya!


Awwww, I love those P-jamas. Noah is bee you tea ful.
Did I hear you right? You are moving MONDAY? As in THIS Monday? Like in 5 days? Do the neighbors know? Because this is, like, the last chance for them to take pictures of you walking down the stairs naked. It's pretty much now or never.

Matt Bradford

Hey - is skull-fucking lazy an actual term? if it is, well...that's just bat-shit insane.


Oh you could come vacation! At Jes and my blogging party! With other bloggers! Where we're ummmm going to prepare my house for my husband! And have a yard sale! And get pedicures! And ummmmm generally do things that cause exclamation points! It's in March though. And i imagine the last thing you're looking forward to right now is cleaning my attic but think of the dust! And insulaiton? Crap. I am not selling this very well.


Turns out, I'm a big fan of stripey grampa pajamas. I'm sort of coveting Noah's, although they would probably fit one half of my calf. (Happy! mooving.)


Yay! A post! So I can stop refreshing your page. And seeing the same thing! And looking like an idiot!

Dude, those are the cutest PJs.

And can't you, like, forget the unpacking or something and, like, go to the library if your internet connection isn't working? I think that's a completely reasonable idea for someone who has just moved into a new house. The week before Christmas.


"skull-fucking laziness"

Thank you for this phrase. I had to stop and stare at it for a moment to wrap my head around it's awesomeness.

Katie Kat

Huffing the Sharpies... priceless.


LOVED the Owen Wilson Toddler hair, lol!!!

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