Saturday morning. Am in shower. Suddenly hear Noah wailing just outside the door. Jason enters, looking white as a sheet, holding our screaming red-faced pissed-off child.
"He fell down the stairs. I was RIGHT THERE and he just...fell all the way down the stairs."
POSSIBLE REACTIONS, GUESS WHICH ONE REALLY HAPPENED:
1) Jump out of shower, assess physical state of child, apply mama-type comfort and kisses.
2) Trust husband's judgment that child is okay, apply wifely-type comfort that these things happen and I understand, you know how I understand.
3) Pump fists in air, shout "YOU FAIL! HA HA," attempt Gob's chicken dance from Arrested Development, almost slip and break hip in shower, shout "IT WAS WORTH IT" at slammed bathroom door after regaining footing.