Lard Dog Responds
September 12, 2007
I are not fat.
I are victim of sensashunalistic tabloid society and unrealistic body image ideels.
Also bad camera angles. Feel v. exployted.
Gained two pounds mebbe. Small one says I can has waffles. Look at face and say I cannot has waffles.
Go on. I dare.
Snausage is teh new hourglass anyways. Read it n Vogue.
Would open VMAs next year and look wicked hott but are boycottin with my boy Kanye.
Love, but u cannot has be under my umbrella becuz u called me fat,
Ceiba!
It's probably not helping Ceiba's self-esteem that you look so teeny-tiny.
(Funny, funny post.)
First? Oh Mah Gawd. Poor Ceiba. She's like the Britney of Amalah-Land.
Oh Ceiba, I am sorry. I actually think have a lovely shape and yes, you can has waffles.
ummm, loving this post. hilare.
and you? look oh so teensy. tellll me your secret!!!
xo, bb
The fabulousness of the wall color in bath + Noah head in mirror are very distracting. Dog? What dog?
Hee hee - the ads in the sidebar were ALL about high protein/low carb diets, weight loss programs, and not surprisingly, cookie and waffle recipes :)
Ding! Ceiba has a complex because her "mommy" is so skinny and hot. You go on with your bad self, Amy!
Poor Ceiba is developing quite the complex. At least she hasn't shaved her head yet!
Amy! Those jeans are fan-frakin'-tastic. Nice.
I'm glad Ceiba responded. Some folks were being pretty harsh! Ha.
Hello, Camel Toe, Ceiba. The Committee for Standards of Decency will suffer massive heart attacks after seeing photo 4.
Ceiba,
Step away from the waffles! I did not call you fat...you're just big boned!
Don't worry, I sure the cat will do something soon and the tabloids will pick it up and then the spotlight will be off of you.
Ceiba, you don't look as pudgy when you're standing up as opposed to those tabloid fat roll pictures from yesterday!!! Does that make you feel any better?
Your flatter than flat abs give me much needed hope as I sit here 35 wks preg with the belly taking up half of my lap! Thanks for that pick me up:)
Ceiba should definitely sue the paparazzi. :)
ceiba's got a beautiful face and would be so gorgeous if thinner (isn't that the backhanded comment a lot of overweight people get?)
and Amalah is hot!
You crack me up. Oh, you too, Amalah.
Ceiba can has waffles.
And goldfish crackers.
And whatever she wants, so long as it doesn't make her ill.
"Snausage is teh new hourglass anyway..." made me ROFL :)
Rihanna would be proud. I would be to if I could stop laughing. Freakin' hilarious.
Own it, Ceiba. Here's to being big (well, by min pin standards, maybe), brown, and beautiful!
Auck, the poor wee girl. She has such a pretty...face.
Poor Ceiba. Damn tabloids. :)
Aww, Cieba, I takes it back.
You is not porker.
You is adorable.
Feeling a certain fatty alliance with Ceiba... am also blaming bad camera angles.
Feeling a certain fatty alliance with Ceiba... am also blaming bad camera angles.
Ceiba-
I never called you fat. So I hope this means that I can stand under your umbrella...because when the sun shines we shine together
You tell the Ceiba!
When people tell me my girls are fat, I tell them she is just healthy. Also, if Noah says you can have waffles then of course you can have waffles. Noah rules :-)
that is the funniest thing i've seen in weeks.
thank you.
I am laughing so hard I am crying. And I'm also sending the two posts to my fellow snarky gossips. Thanks. :)
Ceiba is a girl after my own heart: chubby rolls, waffle addiction, and bad grammar! Rock on. ;-)
Too funny.
Oh my god, I can't read you at work when Ceiba is the guest blogger. I laugh too loud and my coworkers think I'm strange.
Tell Ceiba that two things land you on the cover of tabloids: a few fat shots in a bikini OR photo documentation of your wasting body before hospitalization for anorexia. I think she should congratulate herself for not giving in to the demands and expectations of Hollywood. Love your big, bad self, Ceiba and screw the masses.
My wee schnauzer also put a few pounds on this summer, but on her 10lb body her few pounds are chunnnky monkey. I blame all of the time she has spent at my brother's and the pizza and beer he feeds her. I love her girlish figure even as we take more trips to the park.
Lard-dog looks a-dor-able! What kind of camera is that by the by?
Oh yes, I forgot that I was to come to Ceiba's defense today. NOT FAT. She's still a tiny little cute thing. And snuggly, very snuggly. In fact I think there's a rule in the Amalah-Foodie Household that forces them to be criminally adorable and good looking and NOT FAT.
The end.
where's teh fat?
Zoftig is the new Anorexic.
Ok, so he's NOT fat. But lip synching still leaves something to be desired.
wow! wow you are soooo skinny and seriously you look so cute in those jeans and belt. me and my fat pregnant ass are gonna go pout over some ice cream now!
all i can say is heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heh heeeeeee...
Awwww! It's so hard to say no to a face like that! My doggies say you look just fine!
Too funny! You know that it's your fault (and people like you), that I speak to my dog in broken English. My WH HATES it. He asked me one day why I talk to our dog like that, and I just looked at him and said "do you really mean to try and convince me that he speaks perfect English? You don't speak fluent dog, do you?" Tee hee. It makes him crazy!
BTW, my cats will be so glad to hear that snausage is the new hourglass. At 23, 20 and 18 pounds, they are "robust" and proud. They is can have waffles too. ;-)
Pssst... is it true that Ceiba gained all her weight in rehab and the waffle business is just a cover story? Because that's what they're saying in Purse Dog Weekly, the AKC Star, AND the National Dogquirer.
Oh Ceiba, you can have all the waffles you want. Don't listen to the tabloids -- you are gorgeous!
Am not fat. Am perfect size. For ottoman.
Further proof that metabolisms eventually slow...
holy crap! Look how skinny YOU are!
If you keep that up, the digital cam will end up in the toilet too.
Bad Paparazzi, Bad!
(Good thing Ceiba doesn't ride in limos....athough pic#4 comes close to imitating Brit-brit's flashing incident....)
Ceiba, honey. You look great. But, listen - you needs to fire yer publicist, she ran you in yesterday, girlfriend. And that photog you used for yesterdays shoot? Never again. I'm just sayin'.