The Baddest Mommy on the Block
Stuff, and Then: Surprise! MORE WHINING!

Bringin' SexyVBAC

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Red whore panties + C-section scar + stretch marks = WINNER

(No, I have no idea why I am posting this. It seemed vaguely on-topic, but now that I'm looking at it I realize it's probably just gross. But I know that once I hit the publish button I am going to take a nap. So perhaps Britney-style debasement just seems a lot simpler at this point than a lot of typing and words and zzzzzzzzzzzzzz.)

Comments

Judy

As long as you keep wearing the red whore panties, you're okay mentally!

Tara

Awesome. Good for you.

Karla

One word.
Vavavoom!

Jules

I have 2 of those 3 things, not saying which 2, though.
Jules
House of Jules

Andrea

Wow, your scar is really faint! Oh, and it eez not ze red zat makes ze panties ze whore panties. It eez ze bow. But hey, I think they're pretty. I like red.

Ashley

yeah it actually took me a minute to figure out what scar you were talking about. so there's that...

and cute undies :)

Lisa

Hey - I've been watching this website (http://theshapeofamother.com/home.php) recently and can totally appreciate all of the mothers out there that have already fallen in love with their post baby bodies and those who are struggling with it all...from stretch marks, to tummy pudge, to c-section scars. You should totally send your picture and story in - you would rock the page with those red panties and that barely-there scar!

Sarah

Hot damn!

psumommy

What scar? And LOVE the panties! I can never find cute and/or sexy undies when I'm pregnant. My butt gets too big!

cursingmama

My son (15) has been singing that darn "I'm bringing Sexy Back" song for 2 days - every time he puts his sunglasses on. Now you've given me a reason to smile when I hear him sing it & he'll never know why I'm smirking ;)

Ree

Love the panty peek. Snort.

Mia

Best. Title. Ever.

Mia

Best. Title. Ever.

Christina

Yay for red whore panties! Maybe next is animal print. RARRH!

Vicki

Is it weird that the first thing I thought, upon seeing that picture is, "Hey! I think I have the same panties?"

Just askin.

Shannon

Ha! If I tried to do that I'd need a team of assistants to hold up my stretched out stomach flab before we could find my incision scar (which is waaaaay longer than they are supposed to be, btw!). Your belly is rockin' this picture. :)

Type (little) a

I won't stand for the disparagement of your panties. I'm sure they are just sluts.

After all, panties have no pockets. They give it away for free.

Dawn B

Now if you were wearing granny panties I may have had something else to say..LOL
And your scar! I still had to stare closely as my computer screen to even see a tiny bit of it! That doctor deserves major props.

AmyM

Hey... How YOU doin'?

PS- The fact that you are actually wearing panties puts you one step ahead of Britney.

Bethiclaus

So, I was ridiculously big at the end of my pregnancy with Alliclaus, as I remember you were with Noah. How did your very wee self end up with such small and dainty stretchmarks. I look like I was mauled by a bear from the navel down. Probably genetics. Damn you, genetics!

Petunia Face

I have that same scar but it is instead encased in a very sexy pair of white Old Navy cotton panties. With period stains. Top that.

anne nahm

Why do I want to put two google eyes over that scar and make a muppet?

Also, best title ever and yay bravery and cute pic!

Dad Gone Mad

OMG! I'm wearing the exact same panties RIGHT NOW!

Danell

There's a scar there? Really?

And I don't have stretch marks, but I'd trade them in a red hot second for all the "damage" done to ALL the areas of my nether regions during child birth. And I think it's like the stretch marks: it's been two years now, so I don't think it's going to get any better. Ok, that was probably too much information but I thought it might be okay after I got to see your panties. =)

Audra

Now your poor child will forever be mentally damaged because you wore whore panties while pregnant with him/her. If you ask me that is something to brag about right there.

Sarah

wow, hardly noticeable! cute undies

Melizzard

Okay you just totally made me take off my pants and check...

... and what I suspected was true. I totally could not have taken a picture like that without how shall we say, ummm preparing for bikini season.

Interesting placement. I have a funny story about what happened on my second C when they tried to follow the line of the first scar. I'll save it for if you decide to repeat.

Tricia

That title wins for funniest blog entry title of the year.

You go.

Laura

I seriously had to look for about a minute to *see* the scar.

Suzy Q

Cute panties!

Trishy

You are too cute! And I agree - best title ever!! :)

lisa

wow does t make me a whore because i have the panties!also available in pink!!

Jean

Don't da whore panties fix everything.

HeatherK

That made me giggle. Now do I have to show you mine? ;-) Mine looked like that after just 2 weeks and I was so happy. I don't know if it was the super glue or what, but I was very glad it healed up so quickly.

SJS

Wow. What can I say. Every time I think I am about to be ready to try for a baby I see things like this... It is INTENSE and HEROIC and I have nothing but respect. And then I cuddle my poor sweet Yorkie within an inch of his life and TRY to remember to breathe!

Gretchen

I 5th that (or whatever number we're on): BEST. TITLE. EVER.

Thanks for keepin' it real. It's nice to remember stretch marks are normal, even on someone as cute as yourself.

wine please

I'm impressed. Although I feel the need to warn, in case you haven't slathered-up enough with stretch-mark prevention cream. You will probably get more. You probably knew that though. Me, not so much. Figured my skin did all the major stretching the first time around and that I should have very little additional stretching. BOY WAS I WRONG! I now have stretch marks that snuck up clear above my navel. I did, however, take the Strivectin-SD plunge and surprisingly saw results in the 5 or so weeks I've been irregularly using it.

Kelly

Oh, damn you and your invisible c-section scar. No, that's just my jealousy talking. Mine is thick and bright pink. I'd love to have that scar... wanna trade?

MIP

You can barely see your little scar, but then give it a few months and you won't be able to see any of your nether regions over your belly. Ditto on the best title ever.

Steph

You are so lucky, your scar is barely visible....way less visible than Britney's....LOL.

ali

Okay, so I just turned off "No Country for Old Men" in my Blu-Ray and I looked at the post that had been pulling up on my sucky internet connection, and I forgot that I was trying to pull up your blog (have been drinking wine. what??) and I thought, "What the hell did I just go to? That's hot. Is that a lingerie site?"

SO. Basically. Ain't nothin' wrong with that...

Leslie

O.k. so I was really excited to hear you were pregnant after all the time Jason and you were trying; and of course because I am an infertility patient with two adopted children. But now I must ask myself are you remotely happy to be pregnant?? Because you have nothing positive to say about the experience after you have been blessed twice by the gift of conception. Just wondering.....

Valerie

Be proud of that scar. A TEN POUND BABY CAME OUT OF IT.

kelly

oh leslie, don't you know what kind of guiltspin you will send her into.. be nice to the preg lady. she didn't forget what it was like. she's feelin the full experience.

Velma

It's all good - and all real!

MissAndera

I don't have a c-section scar, I have an episiotomy scar! This pic makes me wish I had a your kind of scar instead.

MissAndera

because its WAY hotter.

MissAndera

TRUST ME....

Melanie

Scar? There's a scar there?

When they spayed me they went in through my belly button - to spare me unsightly scarring, they said, although why they would try to avoid one more ripple in the undulating stretchmark tundra that was my belly I still don't know.

Whatever. I was never a bikini kinda gal anyway.

Blogging your red panties during the first few months of newly-pregnant woe? You are *fierce*.

Andy

Check, check and check - I'm there with you on all three.

The title made posting it worth it alone. Awesome.

kit

Leslie,
There is a humongous difference between feeling blessed and euphoric over the idea of having a baby, and feeling irritable and pissy and having a (sometimes dark) sense of humor re the pregnancy.
When you were in the process of adopting your children, or even after you brought them home and joined lives with them , did you NEVER have a shitty day, roll your eyes, mutter under your breath, acknowledge that you can love the heck out of your children but not love every moment with them? Aren't there ever times that you are exasperated or worn down by this parenting gig, regardless of your crazy love for them? You don't need to be a martyr. Or a Zen Buddhist monk.
It's just like falling in love: you wrap yourself fully in the new love but sometimes, once in a while, your new sweetie just BUGS. You may not even want to be in the same room with them, and don't really need your friends to point out how badly you had wanted to meet someone when you only want to tell them about a fight you've had...
Pregnancy is like that. You can be thrilled beyond belief about the baby, and so, so thankful. You can also be honest in admitting that pregnancy itself isn't all that fun. It hurts and is awkward. You may have heartburn like a fire-breathing dragon, you may have cankles, you may throw up for months on end, you may sport goiter-like hemorrhoids, you may cry every day and be ridiculously bitchy. But STILL over the moon re the baby.
Sounding bitter isn't helpful either. Or kind. Or flattering...
And, don't forget, pregnancy is but ONE means toward the goal: the baby.

kit

Oh yeah, I had to squint and stare down the screen to see the scar too! Luck-out!

Annie Oakley

Kit put it so perfectly...sorry Leslie, it's clear that you are coming from a hurt point of view because of having to work so hard to have your kids, but pregnancy is really hard work and is a long. haul. Crikey. (I only started saying crikey after I became a parent, and had to stop saying Chr*** - can't help I was raised churchy and stopped going, but still say gosh and etc. However, I went through a rebellious phase where I was foul mouthed and had to quit when I had a child.) Anyway, I'll say it again. Pregnancy is a long freakin haul and the heartburn, snoring, nausea, swelling, moodiness etc. has no (NO) bearing on whether or not you have your eyes on the prize. Now, I am contemplating doing it for a second time, and the thought of being pregnant while caring for a baby/toddler (I work from home as a writer too with an 11-month-old) is soooo much more daunting than doing it for the first time. Of course, then, I whined all I wanted because I really thought I had it bad. Full time writer + toddler = 2 jobs. Writer + toddler + pregnant = &(*&Rpuke^*&###*&*

Be of good cheer, Amy!

Dianna

Be careful...
whore panties can get you pregnant.

Leslie,
It's all about love and life...I promise.
It can just get a little (a lot)rough sometimes.

Michelle

How very brave of you! That scare really is barely noticeable. But you can still show your kid and say, "This is how you got here."

Katie Kat

Okay, you were already going to hell for BRAGGING that your c-section scar is barely visible AND flat... now you post a PICTURE???????? Woman, you are evil! :)

P.S. You call those stretch marks? YOU"RE ONE HOT MAMA!!!!!

Annie Oakley

Kit put it so perfectly...sorry Leslie, it's clear that you are coming from a hurt point of view because of having to work so hard to have your kids, but pregnancy is really hard work and is a long. haul. Crikey. (I only started saying crikey after I became a parent, and had to stop saying Chr*** - can't help I was raised churchy and stopped going, but still say gosh and etc. However, I went through a rebellious phase where I was foul mouthed and had to quit when I had a child.) Anyway, I'll say it again. Pregnancy is a long freakin haul and the heartburn, snoring, nausea, swelling, moodiness etc. has no (NO) bearing on whether or not you have your eyes on the prize. Now, I am contemplating doing it for a second time, and the thought of being pregnant while caring for a baby/toddler (I work from home as a writer too with an 11-month-old) is soooo much more daunting than doing it for the first time. Of course, then, I whined all I wanted because I really thought I had it bad. Full time writer + toddler = 2 jobs. Writer + toddler + pregnant = &(*&Rpuke^*&###*&*

Be of good cheer, Amy!

Alice

Hell, I haven't even had a child yet and my stretch marks are WAY worse than yours. Gaining a lot of weight over a short period (damn you, desk job, and also homemade bread) created a web of red stretch marks on my abdomen that go up past my navel!

angie

I'm glad that you posted this. I just had a c-section two months ago, and am disturbed by my scar. I'm glad to see that it gets better.

One of the Amy's

Love the whore panties. Love the stretch marks. They are a sign of a BATTLE. A battle that you WON!!!

Hanna

You scar is much prettier than my first one was, and certainly better than my second. you much have really fantastic skin! This was too funny, thanks!

Hanna

that should have been "must", Typing with a baby in your lap ain't easy!

Jodi

Coming out of lurkdom to say wow, your scar is so faint, and there is no roll of fat like my lovely two c-section belly...

Amelia

I think I have those panties. We should start a club of red-whore-panty-wearers.

Leslie

Kit thank you so much for your take on the pregnancy; my intention was not to offend Amy's feelings, I guess it is always best to go back and read your written word. Of course I have crabby, shitty, head spinning days with my two daughters; it is only that I am so excited to hear about Amy's second adventure after trying for so long....and she seems absolutely miserable, I was just hoping for some more photos of growing baby, stories about Noah's take on growing tummy and the sibling that is coming his way....sorry for any offensive feelings it was not my intention at all.

Sterling Sax

Um, Gross... have you NO shame?

molly

Hahaha I love that you posted this! I'm a 20-year-old with no idea what pregnancy is going to be like, so I love following along with you here and at Zero to Forty.

Dinia

You're going to hate me. I didn't get any stretch marks with my first baby (yes, go ahead, BOO HISS BLEAAHHH), and I have to say that sometimes I feel a little left out, like I missed a badge in swimming lessons! Dumb, I konw. We'll see what happens with this second one on the way. Anyway, ya look great, lady!

rascoagogo

You pretty much rule.

*crosses fingers and hopes devoutly that I will one day have such blessing from the gods of birthing surgery*

supertiff

i think i have those panties!

i always suspected that i might be a whore...


Mitch McDad

You had me at "red whore panties."

Jane

For the morning sickness my ob recommended 1/2 a B6 and 1/2 a REGULAR unisom. Evidently this wonderful combination equals bendactyn (sp) which is no longer prescribed in the U.S., but is in Canada. Evidently there is some concern about birth defects...but research has not borne that out...quite the opposite in fact.

Anyway...it did help with the nausea...and I had it uncontrollably with my second. The kind where you end up in the bed half unconscious from phenergan and it still doesn't help much. And who can really do that when you have a 40 hour a week outside job or have to watch kids at home.

Taking 1/2 a b6 daily helped too. If you do this be sure to check how much b6 is already in your prenatal vitamin...you don't want to go over a certain amount. I'm sorry...I don't remember what it is...I've tried to repress the experience.

Seriously...I had the overwhelming nausea for most of my pregnancy. I'd only wish it on the people I hate most in life. (I'm just not good enough to say I wouldn't wish it on anyone...lol).

Anyway...I do hope you feel better soon. Nausea sucks.

Wacky Mommy

Ah, abandon has stopped by! Yay :)

Reluctant Housewife

Not gross! The little bow on the panties make them more innocent, don't you think?

Hope you had a good nap.

Mother of Beans

Oh. My. Hell.

I've had two c-sections, 14 months apart.

The first go 'round, my scar was HIDEOUS. I wanted to cry everytime I saw it. With the second surgery, the doctors did WONDERS to fix it, but still, it's dark pink, raised, and quite obvious.

I can't believe you can hardly see yours! AAAGGGGHHH

I'm jealous!

DAMN MY CERVIX FOR NOT OPENING IN 46 HOURS OF LABOR!
(baby number 1....)

DAMN CHOLESTASIS!
(Baby number 2....)

GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Marianne

You know, I was going to try to get input from peeps about VBAC ... honestly, I know so little about it and my doctor hasn't said a word. Maybe she will when we're ready for baby #2? I don't know.

Good luck, Miss Amy.

Whimsi

Hope those are silk and not nylon. For crotch health! Not that your crotch health is any of my business.

I'm quite sure I shouldn't hit the "post" button now but screw it.

Ginny

I have to nominate this for the best title for 2008!

Maria

Yeah for red whore panties. I only have stretch marks.

Brad

I'd tap that. ;)

Brenda L.

First off Congratulations! Second, I am also pregnant and due right around the same time (Oct 24th). I have been looking for a pregnancy blog and was happy to come across yours. I look forward to reading your updates...it makes me feel validated with how I am feeling!

FishyGirl

Holy Hell. After 4 sections, I am INSANELY jealous of your barely-there scar. Oy. I lobbied for them to put a zipper in, and my scar looks like they did, only without the zipper part. Gack.

You've got some serious cojones, Amy.

Aimee Greeblemonkey

The panty bow makes it, lady.

And you should see my scar. GI-NORMOUS. It was emergency, she had me under at 6:40 and Declan was out at 6:41. So I forgive her.

Alice

Oh, sod off, Sterling Sax!

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