The Toddlerese Phrasebook
March 24, 2008
"Mama in der? Mmma an na na a CHOUND? In der? IN DER?"
(Mama, do you hear the sound that is coming from that general direction over there?)
"A cow! Jump cow oh uh na amoon!"
(The cow jumped over the moon.)
"A TRAIN! A TRAIN! CHOO CHOO!"
(A TRAIN! A TRAIN! OMFG!)
"Aw, a boo hurt! Na ma a ban aid? Boots?"
(I have injured myself and require a licensed-character Band-Aid.)
"RAWR! RAWR! Onster anna book anna yoo turn da page! Oh no!
(There's a monster at the end of this book and you turned the page! Oh no!)
"No poop."
(I don't care what you smell, woman.)
"Oh no! A messth! Whew! Dapeart? Okay."
(I would like to reverse my earlier position re: poop.)
"I know. In der. A dridge. Ohhh, down. An tuntel. Up up up an der."
(A complicated description of the engineering of drawbridges. I am told I wouldn't understand.)
"Oh maaaannnnn!"
(Success! Swiper the Fox has been foiled yet again!)
"A nack? Okay nack. Nack oh der."
(May I have a snack? Actually, I'm just going to go ahead and answer in the affirmative that yes, I may have a snack. And I'm going to go eat my snack over there. Smell ya later.)
"A chide an mah polpet! A polpet, Mama! Choon an polpet!"
(Uh.)
"DADA! DADA! WHEAH ARRRRRE YOOOO?"
(Dada, Mama is currently denying me the object of my heart's desire, please come home from work to rectify the situation.)
Adorable!
He's adorable.
Is he hiding a puppet in the second to the last one?
my neice has recently started saying "agock"... a word that we have no idea WTF it means.
I feel your pain regarding his (uh.) statement.
Monster at the End of This Book is FANTASTIC! One of our worn out faves. I am glad Noah appreciates the fabulocity of Grover.
Former Kindergarten teacher checking in.
1) Agreed: Grover and his Monster at the End of the Books are best ever. (Yes! A Sequel! With Elmo!)
2) Made up words are awesome. I had to translate 5 year-old "creative spelling." Loved it!
3) Friend's daughter used to point to the ceiling and announce "Hotpits!" during dinner when she was 2. A lot.
"A Monster At the End of this Book" is one of the best books ever.
Maybe he's saying that he has something hiding in his pocket and he wants you to choose which pocket it is in.
This could be a fun game.
Gawd, that was funny.
"Boots?"
Ha!
Love it! I am currently writing my own manual to understanding my toddler since my husband seems clueless at some of the stuff she comes out with. I'm still trying to figure out why she calls her sippy cup "Noah".
I love There's a Monster at the End of this Book! My grandma had the book when I was a kid and I bought one for The Boy before he was even born!!
My daughter just got the Grover book in her Easter basket. She's 19 months old and refers to it as "Page! Turn! Page!" when she wants me to read it. Noah is adorable!
my guess is pocket (like hide in the pocket) or puppet (the puppet is hiding).
I get to hear the songs "G i' for Ga-vahn dat gooda nada me" or "Tin-kerbell, tin-kerbel, eeeee aaawwwww da way! oh davine i' ees da nigh....eeee...HEY!"
Had to comment to say we are also big fans of the Grover book over here. I remember it from when I was a kid and had to buy it for mine.
That was great. My little guy just points and grunts a lot. He just turned one today.
I feel I must tell you that I may have busted a staple or two in my c-section incision due to laughing at this post. Of course, the pain is worth it for the much-needed giggle. :)
Tee hee. So cute. I am totally at a loss on that last one, though.
I'm thinking it's something about his "pulpit". And chiding. Brace yourself, could be a preacher in your midst.
FAB-ulous! And SO adorable. It is fun to imagine his cute little voice when he says these things...and I like that he still hasn't lost adding "a" onto nouns, such as "amoon".
And I must say, your son is very quotable! Last night I found myself saying "Oh NO! Oh no no no no NO!"
Hey, by the way, newnoahvideomaybeplease???
Hilarious and adorable.
I love Toddlerese! I miss the days where I am no longer translator.
And that Grover book? The best EVAH. We have the one my mom used to read to me when I was a kid, and we're reading it to death to all of my kids now.
The Monster at The End of the Book book is the BEST BOOK EVER! I believe I wore out my own copy 20+ years ago!
What is it about Dora that makes her and her cohorts so infinitely quotable? I no longer speak to my son so much as I speak to him channeling Dora.
My guess on "polpet" is "pocket." Did you check his pocket? Or he wanted something to put in his pocket? Or clothing with big pockets? Perhaps Dada can figure it out, it may be a guy thing.
That child is so incredibly adorable.
oohhhhhhhh maaaaaaaaaaaaann
I love when you hear that in public and the strange looks from people and nods from other moms. Like it is some kind of secrect Swiper code!!!
man, that is cute. I need to start asking myself if I can have a snack and then answering in the affirmative.
btw, I sent you a drunken email this past wknd but I'm not sure if it actually went through (reference earlier point re: drunken-ness). I had another celebrity encounter @ the hotel san jose (Sean Penn) and was reminded of our Alan Cummings encounter last year. good times.
Wow, I had forgotten the Monster at the End of the Book! My kids loved it and so did my grandsons, and I had the BEST time reading it in big gruff voices and squeaky voices. I shoulda gotten an Oscar for my reading of that book.
I love Monster At the End of This Book. LOVE.
what a cutie!
It only matters that we understand them!
Choon & Polpet is SO an über-fabulous and high-end fashion house waiting to happen. :)
my favorite part is:
I would like to reverse my previous position re: poop.
almost fell off my chair laughing. he is too damn cute.
i don't think there's a single kid out there who doesn't know the swiper "oh, man!"
We have the Grover book, too. And I must say that I do a very reputable imitation of Grover while reading. Unfortunately it sends me into coughing fits and I'm usually unable to talk for the rest of the day.
Maybe this is why my husband always asks me to read it.
So adorable!
When I was toddler my aunt was babysitting and I kept saying "wishy washy." She couldn't figure it out, even sat me down on the washing machine. My mom arrived home from work, heard me say wishy washy, saw the frazzled look on her sister’s face, and laughed. Then told her that I was saying Wizard of Oz. My favorite movie at the time!
When my older boys were about 2,my dad watched them and laughed hysterically because if he couldn't understand one of them, the other one would show up and chatter at him to try and interpret. He looked helplessly at me later and said "I don't speak toddler."
When my older boys were about 2,my dad watched them and laughed hysterically because if he couldn't understand one of them, the other one would show up and chatter at him to try and interpret. He looked helplessly at me later and said "I don't speak toddler."
whoops. sorry about the double comment there!
I was a linguistics major in college and all I can say is "Sheesh."
Amy, you have a gift for transcription.
Aww...adorable. I remember when my cousin's little boy called forks f*cks - he was a regular laugh riot in a restaurant! Also, he used to call the moon "moat", so they started overcorrecting and it turned into "moona" because they emphasized the n on the end. I love little people speak:)
Dood - you make me laugh. Thank you. And isn't Monster at the End of This Book one of the best ever?!?!
I love toddler nonsense. Mine pronounces his Cs like Ts. I love making him ask for cards. "Wanna pay tards!" *snort*
Does the next to last one really have something to do with another child chewing on something?
"pitty layee laf"
(the pretty lady is hilariously funny)
Oh cuteness abounds! What I hear ALLLLLLL day is "Mommy? What ya doin?" And then it expands to every character, blade of grass and molecule in the immediate environment:
"Mommy? What's Mickey doin?"
"Mommy? What's that fish doin?"
"Mommy? What's that bubble doin?"
"Mommy? What's that intergallactic time-space flux capcitor doin?"*
You get the gist.
*Please ignore spelling...
I love that book... and the sequel? Don't let that little interloper Elmo fool you, he's got nothing on Grover.
I love that he "reverses" his decision on poop!!
Mine does not...ever...even now that he is potty trained - okay, semi potty trained - and it drives me insane. Just the way he looks at me when I smell it like I am insane and says, "You crazy Momma!!"
But just wait until Noah calls daddy an AssHole (or as I always say AssHat) and see what happens. You get in trouble for laughing so hard you pee your pants!!
Man! With eloquence like that, Noah could be the president. How does he pronounce "Noo-kee-ler"?
I love toddlerese, especially because it's a language that really only a mother understands. And that makes it even more special.
I am SO jealous...I was JUST having this conversation with my Mom this morning that I think that I am deficient in deciphering my own child. He has so many similar phrases to those above and I have NO IDEA what the heck he is saying!
This post was both hilarious AND informative! More please! =)
I promise the day will come when you will understand every little sarcastic comment he throws your way. And you will BEG him to shut up.
That is so cute and funny. It must be even more so in person...chubby cheeks and all (even if the cheeks aren't as chubby as they used to be).