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April 2008
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June 2008

I Know Everybody Hates Those "Now Go Click Here" Posts...

...but seriously, go click here and marvel at my baby's impeccable sense of timing. (OB appointment this morning. Check. Baby sounds good, genetic blood tests passed with flying colors, round ligament pain blamed soundly on our excursion to see a certain simpering in-need-of-a-punchin' train, advised to lie down a lot more than am currently doing, which means you can peel my ass off the couch sometime in January, weight gain non-existent, belly possibly filled with helium, Big Ultrasound in four weeks, the end.) Read more →


And His Favorite Thing in the World is a Treble Clef I Made Him Out of a Twist Tie

The other night we had the TV on and a promo spot for Law & Order: SVU came on -- the one with Robin Williams playing some sort of unhinged psycho,which is only vaguely more terrifying to me than Patch Adams -- and at one point he bellows, "You don't know what I've suffered!" Noah rounded the corner at this precise moment, and without missing a beat, pointed a chubby finger at us and shouted, "YOU DON KNOW WHA I SUFFER!" Needless to say, we aren't really dealing with much of a "speech delay" anymore. He still goes to his... Read more →


They're Two, They're Four, They're $64.50

We arrived at the Thomas & Friends Presents: Day Out With Thomas: Great Discovery Tour 2008, Brought to You By LEGO/DUPLO, the Choice for Exxxtreme Plastic Interlocking Block Building, just as the life-sized Thomas engine pulled into the station. Noah managed to catch about a half-second glimpse and promptly lost his mind. "THOMAS!" he screamed. "THOMAS! THOMAS!" I thought for a second he was about to plum pass out from the excitement. Even the will-call ticketing folk, whom I imagine are sick to death of Thomas and Percy and Sir Topham Fucking Hatt after the 17th consecutive weekend of dealing... Read more →


Neverending High Drama & Nonstop Blog Excitement

Dear Ceiba, STOP EATING CHOCOLATE THINGS YOU FIND IN THE GARBAGE. Love, Amy *** Dear Self, STOP THROWING PERFECTLY GOOD CHOCOLATE THINGS IN THE GARBAGE. Love, Amy *** Dear Amy, DON'T YOU TRY TO BLAME THIS ON ME, THAT WAS NOAH'S CHOCOLATE BUNNY AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN GIVE HIM ONE BITE. Love, Self *** Dear Self, I HOPE THE DOG IS SITTING ON YOUR LAP WHEN THE DIARRHEA HITS. Love, Amy *** Dear Jason, STOP LEAVING BAGS OF GARBAGE BY THE BACK DOOR. WHAT, YOU THOUGHT I WOULD TAKE IT OUTSIDE? DO YOU NOT REALIZE THAT IT IS VERY FAR... Read more →