Deodorant Wars III: The Party
Holding Pattern

All That Your Heart Can Take

On Friday, we got the results of my father's heart catheterization, which mostly confirmed what we already knew: there's a very bad blockage in there, a blockage has likely been there for awhile and likely caused his fall last summer and is definitely causing all of his current bouts of dizziness and breathlessness that have essentially kept him housebound for months now. Angioplasty or a stent or medication will not help. Bypass surgery is absolutely not an option because of his age and health and Quality of life, enjoy what you have, and all that.

On Saturday, my mom called 911 after the third nitroglycerin failed to halt my dad's symptoms and he was admitted to the hospital.

Today, they're meeting with the heart surgeon about the bypass surgery. My dad is resisting, and I can't blame him for that. For two years, they've told us the surgery could kill him. In two days, we've simply run out of other options.

I'm loading up babies and pets and an indefinite number of days' worth of underwear. I never really know what I actually can DO when I rush up to visit at the first sign of a crisis, but it's...well, rushing up to visit is just what I always do. So I do that. I'm doing that. Okay.



I'm sorry. I hope everything works out.
Drive careful.


We'll be thinking of you and your family and hoping and praying for the best.


Prayers for your father and all of your family.


Oh boy. You, your dad, your family - all in my prayers.


My thoughts are with you and your family. I hope the doctors come up with a good option and that everything goes smoothly.


Thinking of you and your family

Steph T

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.


Thinking of you and your family.


My in-laws live in PA as well and we've done the pack up and rush up twice, one for each parent. We do it because we can. The drive from DC is not bad, and it really provides so much support for the other parent. We're there so that they have someone to wait for test results with in the hospital. Someone to go call everyone and keep them updated. Someone to run get coffee because they can't bear to leave the hospital room. Both times, the parent who was well protests, tells us not to disrupt our routine and our kids. And each time, they (as well has my husband's siblings who couldn't drop everything and come) have been so grateful. You're doing a good thing.

just beth

I'm hoping the best for you, your family and your father. Take care...




I'm so sorry, Amy. My father has a blockage in his brain. Surgery will never be an option. He's been given the same lines, and I dread whole-heartedly getting the call you received this weekend.

P&PTs headed your way.


I'm so sorry to hear this. Good luck.


Praying for you all.


Oh I'm sorry to hear about your Dad. I will be thinking of him and your family.

Mrs. Who

My dad was in a similar situation several years ago and had a triple bypass. I dreaded going to see him the next day, envisioning tons of beeping machinery and him lying there all gray and still.

He was sitting up, looking great and eating scrambled eggs.

I hope you have the same experience.

And you are absolutely doing the right thing by being there. Either way, you will be glad you are there to support both of them. And, believe me, as a grandparent, there is nothing like seeing your grandchild to realize your life has been well worth living.

Keep us updated. Our prayers are with you and your family.


My heart is in my throat and my eyes are stinging reading this.

My father goes into surgery for lung cancer next week and I'm flying across the country to be there. This is such an odd time, being a mother and a daughter. Seeing life born and unfurling a little more each day while another may be slipping away.

I will hold you and your family in my thoughts.


I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. Will be keeping your family in my thoughts.


Aw, hon, I've been there. Prayers going up for your dad and family.

Hugs. Big ones.


From one Storch to another...You and your family are in my prayers.


Delurking to say I so know how this feels. We have been there off and on with my dad. I will send you bravery and hope, via this weird internety knowing you way. xoxo


We rush to our loved ones side because sometimes that's the best way to show our love and support. Your's doing the right thing.

I'll be praying for peace and safe travel.


I'm so sorry. I'll be praying for you and your family.


I'm so sorry that you all are going through this. Keeping your dad in my thoughts and prayers.


You're all in our thoughts.


I am so sorry. I wish all of you the strength to get through this ~ especially your dad. He gets two helpings of it.


Good luck and drive safe! Fingers-crossed for your Dad!


Oh, the weather sucks. Please drive SUPER CAREFUL. Good luck & I am sure that just your presence and that of the boys will absolutely help your dad. Good vibes coming your (and your dads) way.


I am so, so sorry. You're doing exactly what I would do, too. I wish there was something you, we, anyone without a cardiology degree could do right now. I'll be thinking of you.

Anonymous New York

You and your dad are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm sure being there for him and seeing his grandbabies is a great comfort.

Jen L.

Keeping your family in my prayers...


I'm so sorry. You're running to his side to see him, and show him that you love him. My thoughts are with you and your family.


Oh Amy! Thinking of you all.


oh my- prayers and good thoughts for your dad and your family.


Good thoughts are whinging there way up to you all.


Our thoughts are with you, hoping for the best.

sam {temptingmama}

My thoughts are with you and your family! xoxoxo


You and yours are in my thoughts. Please drive carefully darlin'.

Jessie Mae

I'll be thinking of you and your family.


So sorry. Thinking of you.


I'm sorry. Sending good thoughts your way.


My prayers for your dad and for you and your mom.


Thinking of you and hoping for the best. Take care.


Take care, drive safe. I hope everything works out.


Oh, I'm so sorry. My heart goes out to you and your family. There is nothing practical I can offer in saying that, just as there may not be anything practical you can offer by being there with your parents. But we do it because it's what we can do and it feels like it helps. I hope it does.


Delurking to say you and your family will be in my thoughts. Drive careful.


Oh, hugs, sweetie.
Just, hugs.
I would absolutely be hauling up there too. Sometimes being near is the only thing you CAN do.



I will think good thoughts for your family. I hope your dad is okay!


Wishing your family luck


I am so sorry.


As the caregiver for my dad for the last 16 years--he had a stroke in '93 and I'm his only kid--I am thinking of you, Amy, and your dad.


Know your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

And never underestimate the power of "just a visit". Your presence will be another person to turn to for support and your boys will provide a welcome distraction from all the uncertainty. And believe me, there will be times when a distraction will be welcomed, even if it's just for a few minutes.


I can relate more than I would like to. I am so sorry and hope for only good news for you and your family.


It's called sitting vigil and it is sometimes the most important thing you can do. Just be there, tell your Dad you love him and let him see your boys. We connect because we need that connection to feel alive and to understand our place in the world.

I'll be among the many who will be thinking of you and your family.


Argh, Amy, I'm so sorry. I'm glad you're going there, because yes, you're right, sometimes it's all we can do.

My thoughts are with all of you. Much love.

Her Ladyship

Thinking positive thoughts your direction.


Just wanted to send my thoughts and prayes to you and your family.



I'm thinking of you... and hoping everything works out for your dad. Drive safely!!

coffeejitters (Judy Haley)

best wishes


My thoughts are with you.

Mommy Attorney

Praying for you.

My grandfather had triple bypass at 83. He also hesitated.

He is also still alive, two years later, thanks to that terrifying surgery.

Beforehand he held my hand and said "either way, I have had a very good life." I know your father has had a very good life as well.


I'm so sorry, Amy. You and your family are in my thoughts.


best of luck. your family is in my thoughts.


Thinking and praying.


So sorry. My thoughts are with you. Please, if there is anything I can do, do not hesitate to ask.


Sorry if this comment posts twice. Typepad is being all wonky.

I'm so sorry for you. My thoughts are with you and your family.

If you need anything, please do not hesitate to ask.

Habesha Child

Ugh - how scary. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

all things BD

I'm sorry to hear the news. Prayers for you and your dad and family.


Thinking of you and praying for you all. Hugs. xo


Thinking of you and hoping everything turns out ok. Take care of yourself and your family and drive safely.


Thinking of you and your family at this very hard time.


Oh, dear. Best of luck and all thoughts are with you. I have no doubt that proximity to those grandsons will work some magic.


I think families are meant to rush to each others sides when needed. It always helps. I'll be thinking good healing thoughts towards your family.


I'll be praying for you all.


Hoping the best for your father, he'll be on my prayers!


Sending love and hugs your way. Take care.

Busy Mom

I'm so sorry. I hope they can get him feeling better, soon.


Alright, no one else said it, so I'm saying it: Shit, Shit, and Double-damn shit! This sux and kudos for the rush-do-not-stop-at-go directly to his side trip.
You and yours are in our prayers-

One hook wonder

thinking of you and your family


my thoughts are with you and your family.


What a rotten, frikking, helpless feeling. Sending you support and best wishes from Maine.

Mary Watkins

I'm so sorry Amy....keeping your family in my prayers.


Amy, I'm so sorry. Your family is in my thoughts.


i am so very sorry. my thoughts are with you. good luck.


Sending you good thoughts. I'm so sorry.


rush on, sister. good thoughts are with you.


Good luck, Amalah. I am thinking of you and your family.


Oh, Amy. So sorry to hear. Thinking of you and your family and wishing you all the best.


I'm sorry to hear your Dad is in the hospital and hope he's recovered and bitching about crappy hospital pillows in just a few days.

My thoughts are with you and your family.



I'm very sorry to hear about your Dad. Hope the best for him and your family.


You guys are in my thoughts and prayers.


Thinking of you and your family, girl. Praying your dad is OK.

Amanda B

Praying for you and your family too!


My thoughts are with you and your family.


I'm so sorry. My mum was diagnosed with cancer a few days after my son was born in July and recently passed away. No matter what happens, you'll get through it and find strength in your boys and the rest of your family. I'll be thinking of you and your dad this week and hoping for the best! You're doing great.


Thinking of you and your family with love and wishing all the best. XOXO


Travel safely!


You're absolutely doing the right thing by being there. Thinking of you and your family...


He'll be in our prayers - be safe going up there. This week will be nutty on the roads. And never underestimate the healing power of cute baby and infectiously fun toddler!!!!!


I'm so sorry. My dad had a stent put in seven years ago, and I felt so helpless. He's been completely healthy ever since, and I'll pray for the same result for your dad. You and your family deserve to get a lot more QUALITY time with him.


We will be holding the best thoughts for your family. If there's anything a 'burgher can do to help, just holler. I work in Oakland and live a couple minutes away.

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