Topics in search of cohesion
December 14, 2009
Well. The inevitable happened. My microwave totally found out about my blog.
Speaking of the Inanimate Object Uprising of 2009, I've had a vicious, three-inch-long black-and-blue mark on my left thigh on and off for years now, ever since we moved into this house. And I have absolutely no idea what piece of furniture is the culprit. I've tried to line it up with all of the obvious pointy corners, then gone through the regular motions of sitting down/standing up, and am now opening cabinet doors and drawers, and seriously, it's starting to really unnerve me that there is SOMETHING that I have managed to repeatedly walk into for THREE YEARS and yet cannot for the life of me identify what it is. Thus I cannot move it or unhinge it or take out back and shoot it because IT'S A REALLY PAINFUL BRUISE YOU GUYS.
While I was typing that paragraph, Ezra found an open box of linguine in the pantry.
The Shutterfly contest has up and been extended another whole week! This means they are either super-pleased with the response so far and see no need to stop the fun...or they are not pleased with the response and it's all my fault and I need to slip them a note in homeroom all, "R U MAD AT ME CIRCLE YES/NO." Anyway. If you've got even just a spare 15 minutes and a handful of photos, you can still create and share a photo book and be entered to win a big ol' prize package.
You know, I was not really fazed by the whole FTC blogger-disclosure thing, as I think I've always been pretty clear about what's what around here and at my other gigs (jerks thumb in direction of left sidebar). But lately I have been thinking that it's pretty damn unfair that bloggers now have to declare even the tiniest little Amazon affiliate link while cosmetic companies can have models wear insanely fake eyelashes in their mascara commercials and don't have to say anything.
Legal disclaimer: Model was neither "born with it" nor is this any actual reasonable representation of "Maybelline," unless you count Maybelline products being applied to giant synthetic fibers that have been hot-glue-gunned to a model's eyelids and then given a good Photoshopping just for good measure. Actual results will likely closely resemble your own lashes, but darker and clumpier which honestly you should be grateful for because the longer you stare at this image the more creeped out you become because seriously, HER LASHES ARE TOUCHING HER EYEBROWS. AND I THINK HER CHEEKBONES ARE MISSING. IF SHE BLINKS SHE WILL TAKE OUT THAT ENTIRE SKYLINE. AAAAEEEIIII, AND ETC.
And while I was typing THAT paragraph, Ezra got into the cardboard recycling and attempted to eat the picture off an empty box of waffles.