(Not Yet) Born This Way
26 Weeks

Dog, Thwarted

In which Ceiba is introduced to the new laminate floors in the basement...

MY GOD WOMAN.

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WHAT HAVE YOU DONE.

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WHAAAAAT HAVE YOU DONNNNNNE.

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MY VERY BEST FAVORITE CARPETED PEE SPOT! IT WAS RIGHT HERE!

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I WILL SEEK OUT RESPONSIBLE PARTY. THEN DESTROY.

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AHA! PREPARE TO BE SNIFFED AT FORCEFULLY.

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HMM. OKAY. HI. IS MAYBE NOT SUCH A BAD SORT AFTER ALL.

WILL JUST GO UPSTAIRS TO POUT.

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WAIT A SECOND. WAT'S THIS?

***

So that's been happening. Randy came and ripped up the hideously befouled carpet and put down laminate and my dog is all THERE IS NO TRACTION OR ABSORBENCY PANIC PANIC BZZZZZTTT OVERLOAD.

Oh, and everybody please say hi to Randy, as he is a long-time blog reader, at least he was before I was all, "Thanks for reading! Now please come fix everything at my house that is broken. Which is a lot of things. Also, BEWARE OF ALL THE PILES."  Then I wandered around in my pajamas and a ponytail all the time, just to completely shatter the illusion that bloggers are cool, together people who are at all worthy of respect or admiration. But then I bought his silence with a couple Chipotle burritos. I think.

The other day I told Noah that no, he couldn't have a snack because it was too close to dinner. He got...fairly angry with me over this, and announced his intention to go ask RANDY for a snack, which he prefaced by pleading with him to please rescue me from Mommy. Who is mean. You need to defeat her! 

I thought this was actually pretty cute until I realized he was requesting my vanquishment from the dude holding the circular saw. 

***

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HEH. MISSED A SPOT, BITCH

Comments

Rebecca

CEIIIIIIBAAAAAAA! I've missed you so!! <3

Elle

Ha, I've missed the Ceiba posts.

rachel

Her life is basically a Greek tragedy.

Kailee

Thank GAWD our dog is not a revenge pee-er. Although, with our first baby on the way, it will be interesting to see how/if he acts out. Mostly, he just sweetly plonks his head on my laptop if he deems I've spent too much time dicking around on the internet and need to pet him instead.

Enjoy your new floor! One less surface to vacuum! Yay!

Candace

My dog is indeed a revenge peer. I has a sad. And a lot of paper towels. And a need for new carpeting.

Are you leaving your stairs carpeted? I want to get pergo-type, but confusion of stairs just has overwhelmed me.

Candace

Peer? Pee-er? Something like that.

Julie

Awww, Hi Ceiba! We missed you. :)

Also, Hi Randy! Nice job on the floors!

HolyMama!

Is Randy finished there? because... I could find some serious stuff to fix and burritos also...

HolyMama!

Is Randy finished there? because... I could find some serious stuff to fix and burritos also...

HolyMama!

Is Randy finished there? because... I could find some serious stuff to fix and burritos also...

Heather

Oh, Ceiba is so cute - especially with your narrative. I'm the dog pee question you answered this week on Advice Smackdown - thank you! We sure do put up with a lot from those small creatures, hun? Such personalities they have!

Kathryn

Oh, revenge pee-ers. My angry little dachshund will pee on pretty much anything if she's pissed off (no pun intended). We once had company over for dinner, and because no one was paying attention to her while we ate, she hopped up on the couch and peed on my fucking couch. PEED ON MY MOTHERFUCKING COUCH, Y'ALL. IN FULL VIEW OF THE ENTIRE DINNER PARTY. WHILE GLARING RIGHT AT US DEFIANTLY. I was absolutely mortified. Such a little pain in the ass. She's lucky she's cute.

Amy in StL

My boyfriend was just saying yesterday that his dog had been a revenge pee-er. I thank all Jeebus that my dog is not. He just sulks and looks pitiful if he's not getting attention.

Oh, and more Ceiba please.

HereWeGoAJen

Our dogs don't (often) pee on our floors, but the people who lived here before obviously did. And I mean the people, not that they may have had dogs or something because I have never seen carpeting this disgusting. I am dying for new floors.

theresa

Oh wow, we spent our weekend doing the EXACT SAME THING! Only in our case, it is now the cats that are thwarted (little shits...literally) and rather than pretty laminate, we ripped back to the asbestos laden 50's tile in the basement.

Can you please tell me what brand of "pet resistant laminate" you used?

Chelsie

I've been wondering about Ceiba for a while. How about a Max post soon?

Life of a Doctor's Wife

I would do a lot of things for a Chipotle burrito.

Mmmmmm...

Katie

Wood laminate is not water or pet free friendly. Trust me. :( Vinyl would of been the way to go.

Katie

pee not free. Whoops! :)

Barefoot Liz

I'd been thinking about how nice it would be to have a dog. Thanks for bringing me back to reality!

Barefoot Liz

I'd been thinking about how nice it would be to have a dog. Thanks for bringing me back to reality!

potty training a puppy

Pet blogs are aiming for the best for their pets. They show to the people on how they do take care their pets. They are pursuing programs to avoid cruelty on animals.

erin

someone is nesting!!! i am glad you are getting projects done. YOU ARE GONNA HAVE A BABY!!!!!

kari weber

Am I the only one finding the comment from "@potty training a puppy" a bit spammish? Hmmm...

I love he puppy posts... keep em coming.

Hi Randy! Do you work in California? :o)

I love Chipotle....

Mallory

Hopefully Ceiba's not like my cat...and just finds a new spot of carpet to pee on. (and Yay! New Flooring!)

MariaV

Hello, Ceiba! We've missed you.

Nice job, Randy!

Brandi

So jealous! We have six cats and I would kill for some pergo. They don't pee, but they do puke. And shed. And I hate vacuuming. Enjoy the new floors for me!

Stephanie

Argh, chihuahuas! I can't deal with mine at all.

Kristen

At least Randy doesn't have to worry about tripping over THE TIRE.

Kristen

At least Randy doesn't have to worry about tripping over THE TIRE.

Kristen

At least Randy doesn't have to worry about tripping over THE TIRE.

Kristen

At least Randy doesn't have to worry about tripping over THE TIRE.

Kristen

Wow, sorry my computer freaked out, there. I mean, the tire isn't THAT fascinating.

Robyn

My dachshund will pee on anything soft: carpet, a pile of clothes, a single lost sock, the corner of the comforter just because it's touching the floor.

Robyn

My dachshund will pee on anything soft: carpet, a pile of clothes, a single lost sock, the corner of the comforter just because it's touching the floor.

JaeElle

Ha! "THERE IS NO TRACTION OR ABSORBENCY PANIC PANIC BZZZZZTTT OVERLOAD." I have a min pin too and that is exactly how she acts when she is on laminate flooring. She will not enter the kitchen even for chicken! What's the use of a dog that won't lick up the messes on the kitchen floor? Kidding-my little princessy dog is the best. She, too, is an inside tinkler but not a revenge pee-er.

Cyn

OMG CEIBA. We have SO missed Ceiba! Amy? Could we have moar Ceiba please? *Loves Ceiba*

Mrs. Bachelor Girl

HA! We recently thwarted Chihuahua in much the same manner. It. Was. GLORIOUS.

http://www.bachelorgirl.net/?p=3609

But, like Ceiba, she has now taken to whizzing on the staircase landing. DOH!

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