Montessori Mayhem
Extreme Ezra-ing

Baby Ike, Three Months

Baby Ike officially turned three months old six whole days ago, but I truly believe that if I don't mention something, it doesn't exist. It's just one of my many mystical powers of bullshittery, actually. 

But now that another week has gone by, it's preferable to round his age down to "three months" instead of being all specific. Because 14 weeks old? Are you kidding me? Shut up. Just...shut your fat whore mouth already about my baby. Who is brand new. I haven't even taken the tags off yet. 

Okay. So. I wrote those two paragraphs at 9:15. It is now 11:22. That should, in and of itself, tell you what life with Baby Ike is like these days. 

Baby-ike-9611-1

Basically:

1) Toes, face, and bald head are distracting as all hell

2) NOM NOM NOM BOOBAGE

3) So many stripe-y convict outfits, so many hork-related outfit changes

Baby-ike-9611-2

The "happy spitting" continues, yes. I keep saying dumb things like "OH I THINK IT'S GETTING BETTER" and then someone asks why I appear to have dumped an entire container of yogurt down the back of my shirt and I remember oh, yeah, I meant to change that. I must have gotten distracted.

Baby-ike-9611-4

BY WHAT I WILL NEVER KNOW.

I've packed two entire wardrobes away already. All the teensy tiny newborn clothes and the slightly bigger 0-3 month clothes. I remember looking at the outfits he wears now when he was born and thinking: No. Never. These things are gigantic.

He has found both his hands and his sense of humor. He thinks the word "barfing" is hilarious. Probably because it comes up so often (ZING!) in our conversations. He likes to mimic certain sounds and tries to sing along when you sing to him, and lest you think I am bragging about my brilliant singing baby let me assure you that he can't carry a tune at all

Baby-ike-9611-3

He has rolled over exactly twice: Once when he seemed kind of pissed off at me over something and kicked his legs against my thigh enough to propel himself over. And once in the middle of the night when I went to pick him up and spent three minutes in the dark wondering why the back of his head felt so weird and bumpy before I realized I was carrying him down the hall by his face

I have gotten sooooo good at this baby thing, you guys. It just takes practice.

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But oh, really, he's a dream baby. I keep getting dream babies. I keep waiting for the one who doesn't sleep or screams all the time and I keep getting these little balls of happy, contented deliciousness instead. It's like the universe keeps testing us, like go on, come on, have one more. And then BAM. Antichrist. 

Baby-ike-9611-8

SOON.

Definitely didn't happen this time, though. We got another good one. Another very, very good one. 

***

THINGS BABY IKE ENDORSES, THREE-MONTHS-OLD EDITION:

Boobs

Freddie the Firefly

Miracle Blankets, though God help me, Imma 'bout to duct tape the edges down if this kid doesn't stop busting his arms out and then wailing, like LOOK WHAT I JUST DID, WHY COME YOU LET ME DO WHAT I JUST DID?

DEX Products white noise machine (purchased when Noah was still in utero, has since gone unloved and unused by two whole other children, but is now suddenly essential)

The trusty old Ergo Baby Carrier (with prettified sucking/drool pads, AKA HORK TARGETS)

Anna Carrie Baby Mei Tai

Adiri Natural Nurser, AKA the bottle what looks like a boob

Prince Lionheart washPOD baby bath tub, AKA teh bukkit

Noah's ancient plastic travel swing that I forgot we even owned, kind of an older version of this one, which you may note is significantly cheaper than the Mamaroo that Ike is decidedly "MEH, WHATEVER" about because it doesn't light up and make noise and isn't covered in mysterious hand-me-down stains.

Indian cotton prefold diapers (hated them at first, now I love them, like isn't THAT SO HELPFUL)

Rebel Baby Co. fitted diapers (currently on hiatus, but you can contact Leanne (leanne[AT]rebelbabyco.com) for custom orders/inquiries)

Fleece and wool diaper covers/soakers, AKA WOOOOOLLLLIEEEEEE PAAAAAANTSSSS

Thirsties Duo Wrap and PUL covers from Fluffy's Diapers

Bac-Out Stain & Odor Eliminator (not so much for stains, but amazing for diaper pail stink, and this one may be more exciting to me than him. I dunno. I should ask him.)

THINGS BABY IKE DISAPPROVES OF:

How long it took me and my boobs to write this post

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Aaaaany time now, princess. Hurry it along. 

Comments

Caroline

If that baby were anywhere near me, I would have to chew on him constantly. I do understand your dilemma. Ike is AWESOME. All your boys are awesome. As somebody whose kids are Old and Grown and Flown, I really appreciate vicarious motherhood, Amy. Thanks for allowing the rest of us to watch you raise your fabulous children!

Angie @ Musings of a Violet Monkey

Your three dream babies give me hope! I haven't taken the plunge on #1 yet. But hopefully soon.

He is so cute, it's criminal. (geddit? ha).

~

Sarah

I love you're posts- they always make me laugh :)

Also, we loved the miracle blanket. As our guys got bigger we put iron-on velcro on it (although sew-on might work better) and that worked to keep him in!

Jamie

Ri-dunk-ulous!

Jamie

Ri-dunk-ulous!

Jamie

Ri-dunk-ulous!

Jamie

Three times. Apparently.

Genieve

I know you're roughly eight short years away, but I can now say that both ov our girls are in the Advanced class that goes double speed in math as of today :-)

Elizabeth_K

We love thirsties and cotton prefolds -- we've used them exclusively (and still are) on our 3 1/2 year old (just at night now) and our 1 3/4 year old, and will use them on baby in utero too. I'm a bit jealous of your perfect snuggly babies, but your awesome posts more than make up for your incredible luck! He's beautiful.

Dawn B

OH my he is so adorable!!! Such a happy happy boy. ; )

Dawn B

OH my he is so adorable!!! Such a happy happy boy. ; )

Laura

He is delicious. My daughter just turned two months on Sunday and loves the boob, but somehow has not figured out how to eat enough to sleep longer than 2-3 hours. Any suggestions on a schedule that's worked for you? Must get sleep.

Jessica

Were there words in this post? I couldn't stop looking at the pictures.

hodgepodge

Awww, so cute.

Awww, little man, I can't wait until baby # 3 arrives, AWWWW LOOKIT HIM.

Awww.

Wait wait wait... carried him down the hall by his face?

Aaaannnd infamous spit-all-over-the-screen moment. But it was a happy spit, so I guess that's OK.

JennBo

Re: miracle blanket hi-jinks. I recommend the Doubke Swaddle. I was hesitant to use this because it looks so much like a straight jacket, but it has been successful for my will-be-3-months-in-2-days (gah!) daughter. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EOnsKlluHIg&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Della

You made me snort Dew with the face carrying. That kind of move is reserved for us professionals, huh?

His smiles are melty. Thank you for sharing him. :) (ps HI ZAH!)

Zoë

I'm seconding the double swaddle. We started when the baby was 3 months old. Saved our life, so much so that she was swaddled until 7 months when we finally broke out the sleep sack. And Ike is very nommable so you are excused for not getting anything done when you are too busy gazing at his adorableness.

ps I had 3 dream babies too and they failed in their mission to get me to have a 4th one. So far.

Amber

The carrying-Ike-by-the-face thing made me snicker out loud here in the office. So thanks for that! (Seriously, thank you. That was awesome.) Baby Ike is the cutest thing since babies were invented!

Lindsey

I have had my last two babies with in months of you having yours. We're now currently TTC #3 and it's taking longer than the other two did and posts like this ARE NOT HELPING MY SANITY! Ahem. Pardon me while my head explodes from the cuteness.

ashley

Cuteness! And a great list of goodies for the pregnant-types to research. I like the double swaddle, looks a little cumbersome, but workable. Be sure your Miracle Blanket is snug enough that he can't wiggle, and tuck in the end snuggly. Think: the taughtness of a sprained ankle. The elastic is forgiving in the MB. Mine stayed swaddled till they were 9 months old, and still go to bed with No Problems

Nann

We had our antichrist first, so the universe owed us. She loves to sleep at night but not so much during the day. So we get nothing done but are well rested :-)

MJ

I usually manage not to laugh out loud in the office when I read something funny. But your wondering why the back of his head felt so weird and bumpy did me in--sounds like something I would do. He doesn't look any the worse for it.

Sarah @ w30

It seriously cracks me up that he gets so mad at you for *daring* to allow him to bust his hands out of the blanket. Adorable!

souphead

OMG Crying laughing as my 8 week old sleeps on my left arm which I can no longer feel.
She's kinda awesome. Screamy, but awesome.
:)

souphead

OMG Crying laughing as my 8 week old sleeps on my left arm which I can no longer feel.
She's kinda awesome. Screamy, but awesome.
:)

souphead

OMG Crying laughing as my 8 week old sleeps on my left arm which I can no longer feel.
She's kinda awesome. Screamy, but awesome.
:)

Molly

Hey, what brand of soaker do you use? I've been wanting to try them but no idea where to start...

You make beautiful, beautiful children--every time!

Chris

my baby turned 13 today. this made me smile.

Becca

I love this blog! I've been reading your archives while feeding my son to sleep at night. Your boys are gorgeous. My first is 16 weeks (sounds better than 4 months...)old and I too recently suffered the 'Wah, where'd my teeny tiny baby go?' thing as I put away his first and second size stuff. The wee buggers get big so fast!

Katie

Geez woman, you're hilarious! I seriously almost choked on a chip after busting out laughing when you described carrying Ike down the hall upside down.

Haley

Carrying him by his face? haha I laughed so hard my husband paused the movie we were watching, because it could wait until I was "ready." hahaha I'd pick Ike any day over alien super powers.

Ella

That baby is adorbz.

And you are the funniest, sweetest, most likable mommy blogger out there.

I kinda wanna be you when I grow up. :)

tracey

Amy, you never fail to make me laugh. And Ike is DANgerous. His enormous eyes and amazing ability to communicate at such a young age makes me question being done having babies. Thankfully, my husband is immune to such kryptonite.

mbt

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Sonja

ERGO DROOL COVERS?! Whoever made that is a crazy super genius and I must order seven thousand of them right now.

maria

that last line and last pic!! classic! my lo is now 5 months real soon.. I feel ya!!

Anthony from CharismaticKid

Yes, as a male nanny taking care of twin newborns, walking around with spit up on your shirt in public is a normal thing.

That's when I began working for kids a bit OLDER.

I learned my lesson. Literally. I needed that baby experience to call myself a true quasi-parent.

Tinne from T and T

I have nothing to say but : 'awwwwwwww cuuuuute babeeeee'

Kim

omg!!!! CUTENESS OVERLOAD! He looks like Ezra in the 3rd pic from the top. Totally.
Do you have any thoughts about the Adiri bottle? We've tried em all - but my 4.5 month old is all 'meh! prefer boob!'.... I looked at the amazon review for the Adiri you link to, and WHOA, lots of very specific and confusing instructions... scared me. Should they scare me??

Gillian

Dairy sensitivity!

Amalah

@Kim - Hmm. There are INSTRUCTIONS for the Adiri bottle? HA. I had no idea. I probably threw them out. You fill the bottle upside-down. I do the warming separately, in the milk storage bags, then pour it in. It comes with a cap that keeps milk from pouring out the nipple...but we lost ours, so I just keep a finger over the hole. Screw the bottom back on, and done.

It was the only bottle Ezra and Ike would take for awhile, though once they got the hang of it they both chilled and accepted other bottles -- it's like our trainer bottle. Still is Ike's favorite, though, I'd say.

Kim

THANK YOU! I'll buy it. Cuz I totally think you're a pro!!! :)

Kim

One other ? to bug you with..... she is 4.5 months. Would you say to buy the stage 2 bottle/nipple? She's used to my fire hydrant strong letdown... ;) But then there's the camp of people who say 'use a slower flow!'.. so I'm stumped. I overthink, no?

Kim

One other ? to bug you with..... she is 4.5 months. Would you say to buy the stage 2 bottle/nipple? She's used to my fire hydrant strong letdown... ;) But then there's the camp of people who say 'use a slower flow!'.. so I'm stumped. I overthink, no?

Missmatronic

Re the happy spitting...anyone who said it stops at four months was LYING. My daughter is four and a half months and still voms all over everything, everywhere with great glee. I lost count of the number of people who gave me the four month milestone for it stopping. Just working with "sometime before school" so I don't get too depressed!

Missmatronic

Re the happy spitting...anyone who said it stops at four months was LYING. My daughter is four and a half months and still voms all over everything, everywhere with great glee. I lost count of the number of people who gave me the four month milestone for it stopping. Just working with "sometime before school" so I don't get too depressed!

Missmatronic

Re the happy spitting...anyone who said it stops at four months was LYING. My daughter is four and a half months and still voms all over everything, everywhere with great glee. I lost count of the number of people who gave me the four month milestone for it stopping. Just working with "sometime before school" so I don't get too depressed!

Missmatronic

Re the happy spitting...anyone who said it stops at four months was LYING. My daughter is four and a half months and still voms all over everything, everywhere with great glee. I lost count of the number of people who gave me the four month milestone for it stopping. Just working with "sometime before school" so I don't get too depressed!

Kim

Stop it with the cute. I am done having babies. I do not want any more babies. I especially do not want the sweet grins, stinky/yummy smell, or the post nursing coma with milk mouth. Knock it off. (Ike's beyond cute, by the way!)

Kim

Stop it with the cute. I am done having babies. I do not want any more babies. I especially do not want the sweet grins, stinky/yummy smell, or the post nursing coma with milk mouth. Knock it off. (Ike's beyond cute, by the way!)

Brooke

I'm sure you've gotten this piece of ass-vice before, so forgive me. Giving up dairy when I was nursing my baby really, really, really helped with the spitting. And it made him even happier. Also, it sucked for me because I love cheese.

Erica

My son was born 4/15, so he is a little older than Ike. To swaddle him so he stays put we use the Miracle Blanket, then one of those velcro swaddling blankets over the arms on top of the Miracle Blanket. Like Ike at 3 months Peter became a little Houdini.

Susan

Love the Thirsties Duo Wrap - I use 'em with gDiapers flushable liners and LOVE IT. May have to get some Indian prefolds though, as we finally installed a diaper sprayer and I am not so averse to poop now.

I am celebrating my two dream babies by not having any more, thankyouverymuch, so stop it with the cuteness!

You've mentioned Anna Carrie Baby a couple of times now and it kept bonking around in my head why that name was familiar (I don't have patience to shop Etsy because I constantly get derailed by all the amazing stuff there!) but finally I googled it, and found the article I read a while back.
FWIW, according to this blogger, her carriers are not as well made as they should be, according to this (she actually calls it one of the worst on the market):
http://betterbabywearing.blogspot.com/2010/03/babyweaing-overload.html (Scroll down to Carriers to Avoid)

PopMommy Pam

That kid can't take a bad picture. Adorable.

Julie

I heart you.

Kate

"by his FACE"

and

"WHY COME YOU LET ME DO WHAT I JUST DID"

both made me laugh so hard. Thanks for that.

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