Whole Lot of Nothing
September 26, 2011
I know this blog is the equivalent of a crazy person on the bus* forcing you to look at wallet-sized photos of children whom you possibly suspect came with the wallet, but...Noah had another belt test this weekend:
Practicing for the big board-breaking moment.
Seconds before the big board-breaking moment...
And...yes. So that went well.
It just never gets old. Or maybe it does, sometimes, when it's Monday afternoon and his uniform is in the laundry hamper and he's whining that he doesn't waaaaaaaant to go to karate, and I secretly don't waaaaaaaaant to go either because GUESS WHAT KID, your mom wouldn't mind just staying home on the couch instead of sitting in a chair in a sweaty karate studio, searching for Elmo videos on YouTube to keep your brothers occupied. At least YOU get to take your shoes off and punch things.
And then the next belt test rolls around, and we get to watch our kid fly through the air and crack a board in half on the way down, and then watch him jump around like a ping pong ball because YOU GUYS DID YOU SEE WHAT I JUST DID???? and suddenly it all seems like slightly less of a giant pain in the ass.
THAT'S HOW THEY GET YOU.
(Also, it's Monday and his uniform is in the laundry hamper and so are all of my pants. Goddamn it.)
*After typing that sentence I felt like maybe I had already made that comparison here on my blog somewhere. Self-deprecating reruns! How meta. So I did a quick search for it in the search bar and while I couldn't find that specific reference, I did learn that there are 10 PAGES' WORTH of search results for the words "crazy person on bus" on this blog.
Things that also went well: I had a little girl in my house for four whole days. A little girl who looked like she could be MY little girl. A little girl who wore tutus and sparkly shoes and who, when I told her that I was sorry, but I was going to have to eat her face off because she was so delicious, laughed and said I was funny. And then scrunched up her eyes and offered me a cheek. Which I ate. It was only fair, because her mom was busy gnawing on Baby Ike's neckrolls. Cannibalism! It's way normal and stuff.
Things that did not go so well this weekend: Once our company left, we went to see The Lion King. We had to bail just after Hakuna Matata, because the movie managed to successfully scar both of our children in just the first half alone! I'm not sure Disney's managed a more efficient record since Bambi.
Oh, crap. I had another whole story to tell but Ike is awake and I have to go meet Noah at the bus stop and promised him one of his friends could come over MAN. Shame that my super-exciting life keeps interfering with my incredibly-boring blog. Where I...blog about said super-exciting life. Hmm. One of those hyphenates is probably not entirely accurate.
But hey! Look how round Baby Ike is getting! That's update-worthy, right?
I don't even know the difference anymore.
AND THEN HE BARFED. THE END.