Five Months & Change
Double Indignity

WE ARE

Penn State.

Unfortunately.

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I ran upstairs last night and shook Jason awake. JoePa! They fired JoePa! And then we stayed up for hours watching ESPN, watching the students wander aimlessly around downtown while the eternally-present-and-obligatory group of drunk dickheads smashed some shit up for no reason, just like they did 14 years ago for reasons I don't remember. We won? We lost? We were pissed about increased late fees at the library? I don't know, but it always ended with a couch getting pitched off a balcony and set on fire. FUCK YOU COUCH YOU ARE DRUNK.

We stayed up watching the Paternos step outside their house -- a house I remember driving by, and the whole car went reverently silent once it was pointed out, because it was JoePa's house -- to blearily thank the "kids" who'd gathered on their lawn, only to be completely flummoxed and shocked by the giant seething mass of media that swarmed their doorstep instead. Because they probably still don't get it, how big this is, how awful. That it's not that you didn't do "enough," it's that you didn't do anything. You didn't do anything. Nobody did. 

At 19 years old, I didn't know much of anything. I'd already attended and changed my mind about two different colleges already. I'd already lost track of how many times I'd changed my major and my career goals. I scored a dream job as a reporter at The Collegian and quit two weeks later. I thought maybe I'd try film, or literature, or social work. I didn't know how to get a fake ID but usually managed to get tanked regularly without one pretty well. I didn't get to go to many football games because I was broke and needed the weekend  hostessing shifts at The Corner Room and also liked having the job as an excuse when my parents asked me if I'd found a church yet. Beacause I didn't know how I felt about that anymore, either. 

But one thing I know -- hindsight be damned -- is that if my 19-year-old self heard that there was a chance a child was being abused, she would have done something. If she'd been the one to round that corner in that locker room, there would have been screaming, kicking, hair pulling, something, to make sure that assault ended right then and there. If she'd been the one told about something possibly inappropriate going on, she would have hit 9 for an outside line to the police instead of to the office down the hall so it could be handled internally. No. Because something. You have to at least do something

And I didn't need college to teach me that. 

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We are Penn State.

And we are soooooo disappointed. 

Comments

Hannah

This is one of the better posts I've read about the whole mess.


Angi

Good for you. I am saddened by the whole thing.

Kim

Amen.

lara k

its so hard right now amy. we live right in the thick of it here in state college and its heartbreaking to witness. as a mom (hell just a PERSON WITH MORALS) i'm so upset and disappointed in everyone. to be honest i don't think this community will ever recover. praying for justice. cannot even fathom what the poor victims have been through and what they'll have to go through once trial starts. devastation all around.

Sonja

Amen.

natasha

Amen to ALL that. All of it. My husband (and most of his friends) went to Penn State so I've been inundated with JoePa this and JoePa that through the years (not to mention I went to FSU, Bobby Bowden territory). Well this shut them up real fast. Because really, there is no way to justify how very shitty this all is. Ugh.

Heather

Thank you for writing this. It is perfect.

Leah Rhyne

Congrats. This is a great post. Very well said.

TwoBusy

Well said.

kristen

Preach. That's what I've been trying to explain to my friends who are more concerned with the legacy of JoePa. There were kids at stake here.

robyn

agree, agree, agree.

we are Husker fans, and my husband keeps saying "i think if this had happened at Nebraska, i don't know if i could be such a big fan anymore."

we are shaken, praying for the countless children that have been affected, and grateful for folks like you who get it.

it is not that these folks didn't do enough. it's that they did NOTHING.

Olivia

WORD. The bullshit about "not doing enough" or not knowing who to go to, just no. Maybe the (possibly scared) grad student wasn't quite sure what to do (maybe), but the rest of them knew exactly what they were doing. Sweeping it under the rug because a football program was more important than the safety of children in their trust. BULLSHIT.

Springsteen fan

Oh, Amy, you are so very very right, and this is just a heartbreak. I can't imagine what those victims and their families have gone through and continue to go through. My own son is 10, and it kills me to think of any child abused in any way. Geez I hope karma and justice exist somewhere in this universe.

Ellyn

Listening to NPR report on the riots over his firing last night made me SO. ANGRY. You are rioting because a guy who protected a child rapist got fired?! How about rioting because children were raped on your campus? And the campus leaders let it happen, and let him get away with it. Being a great football coach apparently doesn't make you a great person. The people standing behind him shock me. Have they thought about this at all? If there is anyone left supporting the coach, they need to read the grand jury indictment. If you can still support him after that, or any of them, then you have no morals.
Well said Amy.

Lisak

Spot on. Horrifying.

Also, total aside, your hair is a really flattering length in that photo.

Dianna

One of the best posts I've read......I would have done something too.......

loodles

This whole story has made me sick, but the part that makes me especially sick is the whole "I've discharged my legal obligation" shit. NO. Just fuck no.Police, police, police, not here, use our locker rooms and sattelite campuses to continue to host your overnight football camps for underpriveledged kids.

I keep thinking about those families, the ones that sent their kids to the to good to be true football camps, hoping beyond hope that their kids would get something wonderful from them, something these families might not be able to provide on their own.
I am so fucking sad for those kids and those families, and I hope to God that the victims have their day in court and get the help they need.

Genie

So totally agree!

Seriously, if you think telling someone in the program should absolve you from any responsibility then you deserve what you get. When you came to work the next day and that guy still worked there, you didn't think anything was wrong? Give me break! If someone else says, "well, he told who he needed to tell," I'm going to slap them. He didn't do enough for a child. And that's the point. And come on ... the University is a business, they let him go for their bottom line. They're not crazy. No way were they going to let him "finish out the season."

Curly

Such an eloquent piece on such a sad situation.

I hope the victims find peace and justice somehow (though that doesn't even begin to repair the damage in my eyes).

Amy M.

This whole situation makes me feel ill. I don't understand how a stupid game (granted, one that brings in a tremendous amount of revenue) could trump the well-being of children! I don't understand how all those men who knew about this allowed these things to continue, including the grad student, who has yet to be fired. I live in a Big 10 town & know how much college football consumes people's lives, but this is atrocious! Well written post, Amy!

Txtingmrdarcy

We used to bleed blue and white.

We used to have a man who was simultaneously an idol and a grandfather to all of us.

We used to.

It's hard when any idol is toppled, but they absolutely without a doubt DID THE RIGHT THING in taking decisive action.

Adventures In Babywearing

I am nauseated at the whole thing. I agree with you 100% and then some.

Steph

Stephanie

Well said, Amy. Quite a legacy these men have left themselves...all by choice.

Cath @ Constance Reader

We ALL are Penn State today, Amy...because like the hundreds of thousands of students, alumni, parents, staff and educators who were NOT involved in covering up this terrible situation, every one of us was blindsided by the acts of a handful of evil and morally deficient people. Today I stand with the victims, and with the all the good people of PSU who were caught up in this...who are so much more the heart of the school than some dickdouche coach who didn't do enough.

Kiki

You know what's really crazy? That most of the fury has been directed towards Joe Paterno and whether he carried out his responsibility. I've heard hardly anything about the grad student who walked in on Jerry Sandusky abusing a child in the locker room showers. His or her reaction was not to call 911 to report the abuse but to tell Joe Paterno and expect him to take care of it? I don't know the grad students name (I don't even know the gender)but I have heard that said grad student is now an assistant coach. Where is the fury for this primary witness? Why is all of the fury directed at Joe Paterno? No doubt, Joe Paterno was wrong, but people should be mad at every single person involved in this mess.
In that same vein; Jerry Sandusky is a vile monster. But in every news story I hear Joe Paterno's name a whole lot more than Jerry Sandusky's.

Lar

This story highlights to me the importance of always trying to act in the most ethical manner possible, no matter the consequences. If, at the first instance of Sandusky's "alleged" misconduct, the police had been notified and he'd been fired, there would have been a scandal and some bad press and possibly some lawsuits from parents of kids he allegedly molested. But guess what? That's happened now anyway, plus more people have been fired and the press is even worse.

And on top of that, it all raises this question: if they covered up THAT, what other stuff did they cover up? If no one had any qualms about sweeping a little child molestation under the rug, is it possible that other, less horrific but still immoral/unethical things happened that were covered up? Maybe not, but now they've opened the door for their ethics to be called into question. And that's a terrible, terrible legacy to leave.

andrea

Right on. My husband's family live central PA and Penn State football is undeniably the center of holiday conversations. Inevitably someone will ask, "so when do you think JoPA will retire?" and everyone laughs. because it's JoPa and he was legendary and revered. No one knows quite what to say now. My husband, his family, and friends are silenced by the magnitude of THIS..THIS awfulness.

Kate

Amen. JoePa will certainly be remembered. Just add "accessory to a serial child rapist" to his hall of fame ballot entry.

Dawn

I just don't understand what's wrong with these men in the first place. What happens to them that the thought of molesting a child even occurs to them? How on EARTH does anyone find a child appealing sexually? It's just so far removed from my own thinking that I can't fathom it.

And if they kid themselves that it doesn't do any real or lasting harm, they need to sit down and have a chat with those of my friends who were molested as children. None of it was violent or physically damaging but they all, to a person, are still dealing with the psychological effects and we are all in our late 50s.

It is a heinous, vicious crime. And most frightening of all, it is not an uncommon one.

Gina

Perfectly said. I am getting so sick of all the fighting and comparisons: JoePa isn't as bad as McQueary, McQueary isn't as bad as Sandusky, etc. They were ALL wrong.

Cheryl S.

Thank you. You have it right and you expressed it beautifully. Those kids that are rioting, I want to ask them one question. If this was your little brother in those showers, would "I told administration" be enough? Yes, it was his only duty under the law, but is it enough? We all know the answer to that question. All those people knew. I feel awful that Paterno has to do out this way, but hie made a choice.

Someone needs to hang a sign on the football showers. "All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing" -- Edmund Burke.

Carmen

Well said. The whole thing stinks. Had I walked into that locker room, I would hope that I would have done something to stop it. But I do know that even if I didn't intervene on the spot, I WOULD HAVE DIALLED 911. That no one reported this to the police is flabbergasting.

Angie @ Musings of a Violet Monkey

Very. Well. Said.

~

Jill (mrschaos)

I've deleted this comment a few times because I'm so at a loss for words.

Thank you for writing this. You said it all perfectly.

Ami

I am not your FB friend, but I just shared the link to this post b/c it is so well done. Thanks for putting words around it.

-k-

Stomach-turning, gut-wrenching. All of it. It is UNBELIEVABLE to me that people would riot in support of somebody who could know that children were being raped and do *nothing*. Can you imagine the effect that must have had on the victims? I am so furious, so sick with pain and hate.

Cheryl's quote says it all.

SarahB

Thank you. I have found this so upsetting on so many levels...as a person, as a mother, as a mother of a son.

SarahB

Thank you. I have found this so upsetting on so many levels...as a person, as a mother, as a mother of a son.

Ris

THANK YOU for writing this. I could not agree more. The kids rioting over "one more game" just make me sick. Don't they get it? That's like asking for Roman Polansky to get to make "one more movie." No. What JoPa did (or didn't do) was wrong. And if people think that he's being unjustly treated and no one else is taking flak, note that the PRESIDENT of the university, a man who had been in that position for 16 years, was also fired. The Board of Directors seems to understand the gravity of the situation and are acting appropriately, even if the student body doesn't.

Kailee

Spot on, Amy. This is one of the best things I've read about this terrible, heinous ordeal.

You're right. You have to do something. When a child. Is raped. On campus. By a member of the staff. Well, it's not the time to send the report up the internal chain of command. It's time to do something more.

JB

Well said. I'm having trouble putting my thoughts together about this also, so thank you for this post.

Sarah

This. exactly this. I didn't go to Penn, but did go to another large state school where sports are king (the University of Kentucky). I cannot imagine the embarrassment I would feel if this was UK. My heart is so sad for these boys, and horrified with the protests.

andrea

re: Cath

I was thinking about the faculty, staff, and students of Penn State. A university is so much more than its football team. I work for OSU and while the Tressel thing was big, it's nothing compared to this. Penn State is a great school. I hope that it can recover from all of this.

Jen

FANTASTIC post.

grammargeek

Thank you so much for writing this. I wish everyone who is feeling "conflicted," or "not in line with the majority opinion" would read this and realize that there are not two sides to this issue. At all.

But I Do Have a Law Degree

I went to PSU too! I graduated in 2000. I also wrote for the Daily Collegian. And I also wrote a similar post on my blog this week.

The whole thing is sad, depressing, disappointing, disgusting, all that. Heads should roll.

But I still love Penn State. Always will.

Heather

I haven't touched my blog in months, but today I did because I didn't want to get into a flame war on fb with comments from people who just don't get the enormity. All I wanted was to express the same sadness and disappointment and figure out why and where to go. Unfortunately no answers to those questions but that and reading posts like this made me feel better.

Di

Well put. I am a PSU alum too (and was a journalism student as well..) And what is so deeply sad about it is that all the adults here seem to have thought that doing the bare minimum was enough. That they washed their hands of it once they passed the buck, and never thought about it again. These were at-risk kids, these were someone's babies, and no one thought to follow up.

Jacquie

What a mess. Makes me ill. What is wrong with people????

Jennifer

Excellent post thanks for writing this. Class of '94 and I share a lot of the same emotions - sad, angry and oh so very disappointed.

RS

Excellent, excellent post. As a Pennsylvanian who did not attend PSU (Go, Temple), I've always thought that the "bleeding blue and white" mania was a little creepy anyhow, and that the JoPa Kool-Aid was beyond all reason.

But this? It's a cluster-f*ck of purposeful neglect and abundant misconduct at every level. The more I learn about the details of this tragic travesty, the more it makes me sick. The 28 YO grad student who witnessed the rape of a 10 YO boy turned away and went home to call his *dad* for advice? The alleged incidents first came to light in *1998*?? Sandusky was still permitted to remain active in the charity and work out in the damn PSU weightroom? Joe Paterno did the bare minimum that he was required, according to PA law, to do ... and not an iota more??? W. T. F??

I hope that those rabid PSU alum donors think twice - or ten times - before writing their checks out to support the program next time.

I hope that someone, somewhere, can "detox" the students who are clutching their pearls and wailing in protest at the "unjust character assassination" of their beloved JoPa.

And I hope that this leads to a full-scale inquiry that both leads to some semblance of justice and closure for those victims (albeit too little, too late) and to the re-examination of the skewed priorities of a university that would elevate its football program to such heights that this would be allowed to happen.

Obviously, your post struck a nerve, Amy - sorry for such a long-winded comment. But thank you again for your eloquent, candid take on a heinous situation that was complicitly aided by Paterno and PSU.

TheKitchenWitch

My husband is heartbroken. What a mess.

Suzanne

Well said, thanks so much for putting into words.

No, he didn't do it, but he didn't say anything. The thing that gets me is what if it were his child or grandchild?

I think as a parent, that's the thing that gets me the most. It's okay if it's other people's children, in order to protect the athletic program? C'mon JoePa, what were you thinking?

Sarah

Thank you. This was perfect.

Amy in StL

I've thought for a long time that college sports are given too much leniency and allowed too much rope when it comes to poor grades, misconduct and giving privelege to those who play a GAME. Looks like they've started to hang themselves with that rope.

Meg Groesbeck

You are right. Thank you for speaking up. This is not about football, this is not about his legacy, this is about the kids. THE KIDS. I'm so upset with the anyone who spins this into talking about his legacy as a coach. That poor, poor child. All I can think about is that poor child.

die Frau

Yes, seeing all the student outrage for JoPa concerned me deeply because it seems to me they're missing the point: He had a responsibility as a coach, as a mentor, as an employer, as a father and grandfather, as a *moral person* to do what he could to stop one of his employees from abusing his position in every way possible. No, he does not deserve all the blame. However, this is an example of CONSEQUENCES FOR ACTIONS (inactions). A lot of the student body don't seem to understand that, caught up in their beloved JoPa. Why not more outrage for the actual victims of this crime? It reminds me of a teacher at a school I taught at who got caught redhanded in a relationship with a student. He abused his power to get this girl to have an affair with him, and yet parents protested his firing, claiming he was too good a teacher to let go. See if you can say that when it's YOUR daughter. Ugh, sorry, I'll stop.

Eloquent post, Amy.

Megan

As a Penn State alumnae and as a mother of two (almost three) small girls, the events of the past week have made me so sad on so many different levels. Most of all, I am sad for the children involved and injured by the action and inaction of so many. "Let no act of our bring shame..." This week, I am ashamed.

And also, we probably were at Penn State around the same time. I granduated in Spring 2000...

Christine

Yes.

Karen

I too am so sickened by the people who are upset about his firing. One is a local college professor in our town (which is nowhere near PA but we are from there). I just do not see how anyone could walk away from that going on with out saying something. That boy suffered and was probably praying to God that someone would help him. Someone walked in and saw it and let it take place. Disgusting.

Kira

I couldn't agree with you more. We are a Penn State family. You know all those car magnets? My uncle started that whole trend at a Penn State football game. Now he makes them for a living.

At our house he wasn't JoePa, he was Uncle Joe. I use to be proud to have gone to Penn State, not so much anymore.

Molly

Thank you for this.

Laura

I'm a long time reader/lurker, but I had to comment and say Bravo to you today for your post. I have been watching the whole thing absolutely appalled and your post reminds me that there are still people out there who WILL stand up.

Babs

This post? The ending disappointed me. Because you are an awesome writer. Because there are stronger words than disappointed. Fans get disappointed when their team loses, when a player breaks the rules and gets booted, when no body seems to care about the rules and lets a player misbehave.

I'm disgusted, horrified, grieved and sickened. I'll save my disappointment for Ohio State...

Janessa

I am disgusted by the whole thing. Thank you for writing this. WHY are SPORTS more important than the safety of our children???? FUCK FOOTBALL (and all the other sports).

rockle

long-time lurker here, just chiming in to say: QFT, everything that everybody else said. i grew up a penn state fan, married a penn state alum, hoped (still hope, maybe) that my kid would go there one day. there are not words for how we feel right now -- we haven't even discussed it at home, not really, because we both already know how we feel, just by looking at each other. we feel terribly about the whole thing, that this was going on and we didn't know there was anything to be done.

and i feel really, really terribly for all the kids still at PSU, the ones who aren't idiots, the ones who will be graduating this year and have to go out and attempt to have a future with this hanging over their heads and weighing on their hearts. the ones who would have done something, ANYTHING, and have to find out LIKE THIS that other people, people they trusted -- those people didn't.

Betsy

In a perfect world everyone would do the right thing.

Ginger

I don't know how you just...walk out. And ignore. And, what, hope for the best? No. NO. NOOO.

Disappointment doesn't even begin to cover it.

Jessica

I'm de-lurking. . .great post. If there's anything good that can come out of this it's the hope that this will bring attention to the "circle of protection" that often happens in sexual abuse cases and will prevent this from happening again. RAINN is doing a campaign to raise money for victims, started at the request of PSU alumni. . .thought you might be interested. I worked in a foster care program for five years. . .I only even saw one case of sexual abuse prosecuted to it's full extent. Society has to do more.

http://www.rainn.org/ProudPSUforRAINN

Kim

There is no football result on earth that justifies this. Not only did they do nothing to help the first child, they allowed this molester access to more children. People look up to you? He was like a father or grandfather? Earn it.
My husband called me this morning and said, just so you know, if I rounded a corner and found someone doing that- I finished his sentence: he wouldn't be walking right now. That is the only possible response to someone, anyone, hurting a child, particularly in such a perverted and despicable way. Nothing else is acceptable.
There are some entilted students in sore need of perspective right now.

Carole

Great post

troze

Well done. My heart spits fire over this and I am shocked and horrified and scared. Why does our society include such a large group who seem to completely disregard children?

Lydia

Every.single.person. who was made aware of the rape of this child in 2002 who did not call the police needs to be fired. Every one of them. I would be sick if this was my university. Actually, I am sick and it's not my university.

I hope Penn State, and it's football program, spend the rest of time championing and giving money to RAINN. It will not make up for this, but it might stop one more child from being hurt.

robin

Perfectly said Amy. There is no fine line between right and wrong here. It was very clearly drawn and JoePa did nothing.
As an alum of a Big Ten school, I am saddened for the victims and the people who love their college. The football establishment at Penn St. has irrevocably hurt their institution.

Andrea/Confessions of a Daydream Believer

Amen! Fantastic post! It makes me sick just thinking about those kids that didn't have a voice, it was taken away.

Murf

As an educator, let alone a human, you have an obligation to protect children....period.

Great post.

Kara

Beautifully written. Per usual.

Loren

Amen. I'm hopeful that there are some 19 year olds just like you who are on campus right now, setting their couch-throwing peers straight.

elithea

in even a marginally tolerable world, SOMEONE would do the right thing.

Mary

Ugh, yeah. I graduated from Penn State. And now I work for child protective services in Pennsylvania. So this couldn't hit much closer to home for me. It's just awful and sickening.

Natalie

As a mother and a sports lover, this story just saddens and sickens me. Thank you for stating what we all are thinking...how in the hell could he not have done something, anything, to stop this behavior???????? JoePa, you should be ASHAMED of yourself!

samantha jo campen

Thank you. For this. Reason 4839485732 why I continue to adore you.

Kim

Thank you so much for this post! I've been so infuriated about the constant conversations about football/legacies/coaching....because no one is talking about these kids! Child abuse changes the trajectory of a young persons life forever. That is bigger than football, and anyone who wants to waste another breath defending those coaches should be ashamed of themselves. Just wrote my own blog post about this, because I hope in some small way that those boys will start to hear all of us talking about how BRAVE they are.

Sue

Amen. So well said.

Megan

This story has haunted me for the past week, and I don't see it getting better any time soon. Part of my job includes working with abused children, so obviously it's touched a nerve. The other day, after I had a mini-rant about it to some friends, one asked why this case had me so riled up. He wasn't trying to be insensitive - his point was more like, "You hear about terrible stuff like this all the time, so what's up with this particular situation?" I let myself cool down for awhile (because it WAS insensitive), thought about it, and then said this: The worst part about it is that in many cases of child abuse, the signs can be pretty subtle. It can take months or years before someone finally connects the dots to figure out what's been going on. Or, when the signs are a little more obvious (ie, bruises) or when a child has the tremendous courage to disclose, there's always the chance that they can be explained away in some fashion ("He's just so clumsy" or "She's such a liar - you can't believe a thing she says"). In this case, it appears that we had a bona fide EYEWITNESS to the abuse - and the act was SO egregious, SO unmistakingly abusive - so the fact that it wasn't stopped then and there is just heartbreaking to me. I wonder what was going on in that little boy's head - the fear, the shame, and then the hope that this witness would do something to stop it, only to be ignored in the name of preserving the university's reputation. And in the end, how short-sighted that action was - they had the chance to be the hero, the defender of our youth. Now their legacy will be just the opposite.

Rachel

I think you summed this up perfectly.

As an individual who works with children (as a preschool teacher) I have the legal obligation to report. As a human being, however, I have the MORAL obligation. I simply cannot fathom how anyone could see or hear about this happening and NOT act immediately. And by act immediately, I mean call the police and report this man!

The news said today that the three men may be able to slide around this in court because they were not technically in charge of the camp or the children. Really?

Legally they may not have had the responsibility, but I would never stand before a judge and say "I'm not guilty because I didn't have anything to do with the camp." Because you ARE guilty. You're guilty of knowing it occured and doing NOTHING! Outside of the fact that I would go to jail for not reporting in my line of work... I would never forgive myself if I didn't report something and something happened to a child.

I think the university acted in the proper manner by firing the three individuals, but I also think this is going to tarnish the reputation of a good university, maybe forever.

LCA

Thank you, Amy. Even some of my most feminist, activist, outspoken, hippie friends have been finding some way to justify this, saying, "If you aren't a college football fan, there's an element you don't get." But I get what really matters here, and it isn't football. I'm so sorry this is your school, but you represent it so, so well.

Kathryn

Amalah, this post reminds me just why you're my favorite blogger. As a fellow PSU alum, you have expressed so clearly the thoughts and feelings that have been jumbling around in my head this past week. It's just all so fucking sad.

Julia

wow, so well said. no excuses. I am so horribly tired of sports over-riding common sense. fuck football, not kids!

Amanda

Thanks you. It saddens me to read that some believe Paterno is innocent and should not lose his job. Not to mention the actual witness is still working there as a coach!

oldladymac

Amy, you get disappointed because your cake didn’t rise, at child molesters you should get really angry, furious even. PSU should have their whole program shut down and I hope that Alums show them, that this behavior will not be tolerated,by witholding their Alumni $.

elle

(I'm really sorry if this posted already, or like 5 times, I am having PC issues)

That grad student needs to grow a pair, and I hope he looses his job too (and his career). How could he not call 911? Instead, at 28 years old, he ran home to his daddy, who also did not tell him to call 911. And that old janitor. . . so many of these people let it happen. Makes me wonder how many other similar situations are going on in this country right now.

I hope so hard that I would never be the one to just look away when a child literally being raped right in front of me looks me in the eye.

And Sandusky, what a sick fuck. Please people, if you want to sleep well tonight, don't read that grand jury report.

Kelly

Compelling and articulate post. I went to Virginia Tech and though I'm not trying to directly compare the two tragedies, I only want to say that I identify with the particular heartbreak that comes from seeing a place that incubated your journey from youth to adulthood become synonymous with tragedy, heartache, and darkness. I hope Penn State alums can come to a peace that the school is not defined by the evil and cowardly actions of a few, but rather by those who rise up and stand for truth, integrity, and light. My prayer are for the victims, that they will have hope that healing and light can follow darkness.

Big Gay Sam

Thank you from the bottom of my heart. To this day I suffer with PTSD and night terrors due to my sexual assault as a child.

Nobody helped me either. I went almost my early adulthood without guidance or support. It wasn't until college that I started going to therapy. After the worst anxiety/panic attack I had ever experienced. I had a lot before then but never like this. I found out later it was because of something called a "trigger".

This entire Penn State horror story has been one big trigger for me. I CAN imagine what those poor boys have been through. I have been crying non-stop ever since this story broke. I know the hell that those poor children were dragged through and I know what they are dealing with as adults. I hope they have the help they need. They are going to need a lot.

Once again. Thank you. I truly believe if you had been there, I would have been saved.

Thank you.

heather morgan

Great post.

L.R.

Why aren't all these ex-high flying university people AND the immoral grad student being charged as accessories after the fact of the rape the grad student walked in on.... and conspirators on all subsequent rapes? I do not understand the legal system on this stuff!

Beth

It's worse than that:

“I hear there’s a rumor that there will be a more shocking development from the Second Mile foundation. Hold onto your stomach boys. This is gross. I’ll use the only language I can. That Jerry Sandusky and Second Mile were pimping out young boys to rich donors. That is being investigated by two prominent columnists even as I speak.
The other thing I think that may eventually become uncovered and I talked about this in my original article back in April, is that I think you will find out that Jerry Sandusky was told he had to retire in exchange for a cover-up. If you look at the timeline, that makes perfect sense, doesn’t it?”

— Pittsburgh radio host Mark Madden, on a call in to the Dennis & Callahan show Thursday morning, weighing in on the still-developing Penn State sex rape scandal involving former Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. Madden was the first reporter on the Sandusky trail, as he wrote a story for the Beaver County Times in April 2011 calling for Penn State officials to explain why there were allegations against Sandusky for improper conduct with underage males.

Laurie

You know it, sister.

If Gary had done that at Maryland I would have wept and been sad for the wrecked basketball legacy for what it means to my dad and my uncles and cousins and me.

And I would have still picked up the GD phone, immediately. Right is right, kids are kids. Unconscionable. Cannot even process.

I am so sorry for all of you alums. I'm sorry for JoePa nation. I know what it means. But most of all I'm sorry for those kids. Football < their bodies, lives and souls.

(You really are one of the best there is on the internet. But I hope you knew that already. ;) xo.)

Amy - Hamlet's Mistress

Yes. This. Disappointed and heartbroken. I've spewed about this on my own blog twice this week and believe me I NEVER ever post my links on other people's blogs. But I've had such positive feedback. And us PSU-ers, at times like these? We have to stick together.

I am... Penn State... http://hamletsmistress.com/?p=1861

When Heroes Fall...
http://hamletsmistress.com/?p=1868

Love you, grrl.

kelly

Well said, all of it.

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