It's Hard Out There For A Baby Ike
The Man on the Metro

Red 40, Sugar, HFCS Everywhere, and Not a Drop to Drink

This post is sponsored by the Brita Bottle for Kids.

If I may be obnoxiously braggy for a second...

AUDIENCE: Oh, just for a "second?" Really? As opposed to...

Shut up! You all just shut up. Yes, for a second. Start the clock: None of my children drink soda. 

See? If you read that sentence fast enough, I am pretty sure you could get through it before the end of one-Mississippi. 

The thing is, none of my children drink soda because they don't like it. Noah and Ezra have both taken exactly one sip of soda in their entire lives, and to this day remember it as a horrible moment, a total betrayal of their faith in delicious, refreshing liquids. The second the carbonation touched their innocent tongues they shrieked and...well, I wouldn't say they spat it out as much as they simply opened their mouths wide and stared at me helplessly as the soda dribbled off their tongues and all over the table. 

They both refused to touch anything "bubbly" after that. Which is great. My soda = bubbly. My special wine-juice = oh, you know that's bubbly. 

Which is great. Soda is terrible for kids. Terrible for...well, everybody, really, and oh how I wish I could similarly recoil from a cold can of Coke, or at least be able to have it in my house without drinking it (followed by two more in rapid succession). I would be very, very happy if my children never picked up the habit and remained blissfully unaware that there are beverage choices beyond water, milk or watered-down juice. You know, for special occasions.

(God, doesn't our house sound like fun and a half.)

While I'm aware that eventually, it's all going to be out of my hands, I would very much like to live in my little dreamy-dream world of only healthy beverage options for at LEAST a little while longer. But it's already getting challenging. We went to a birthday picnic a couple weeks ago where the only drink choices for the kids (who were all in the toddler-to-age-six range) were red Kool-Aid pouches and cans of orange soda. 

Okay, health food snobbery aside, the fact is that Noah in particular CANNOT have that stuff. Artificial coloring and his little nervous system do not play nicely together. It makes him hyper, unfocused and incredibly anxious. But there we were, out on a playground on a hot humid day, and he was thirsty. The adults had already laid claim to a small stash of bottled water for themselves (or for their kids, since I swear I wasn't the only stick-in-the-mud who blanched at the idea of giving Kool-Aid to my child on top of the already endless cake and ice cream and candy). 

The only options I saw were giving in and letting him drink the red stuff and deal with the behaviorial consequences...or hoisting him up to take drinks some a somewhat suspect-looking water fountain near the park's bathrooms. 

Confession: I told Noah the juice pouches were bubbly and took him to the water fountain. 

So that's where I was, awkwardly holding up my 50+ pound child while still locked in a mental battle over which was worse: Red 40 or all of the GOD KNOWS WHAT in the water, when another mom came over to wait behind us. 

She had a water bottle with her. She unscrewed the cap and filled it up a the fountain, and I realized what it was. I realized what it was because I had JUST THAT WEEK agreed to write a sponsored post about one. (The post you are reading right now! So meta! So Neo-in-The-Matrix-saying-WHOA and stuff.)

It was a Brita Bottle for Kids, with a built-in water filter. You know, the exact sort of thing I would have killed to have in my bag that day. Mine was still in the mail.

It arrived a couple days later. Yay!

Photo (57)


(Both to the bottle and my fresh pedicure, yes.)

Photo (58)


(WHAT? It was my first pedicure since right before Ike's due date. I'm a little jazzed about my return to non-Hobbit-feet-ville, okay?)

Anyway, it's a brilliant little jobby thing. I love that I don't have to risk the contents of my bag getting soaked by hauling water around in "spill-proof" sippy cups (HA HAHAHAHAHA) and that I can fill it up anywhere, as many times as I need to (the filters last about two months). Since Ike isn't yet proficient with the sports-style spout, I bring a take-n-toss cup with a spout or straw for him then squirt filtered water into that. (Which isn't nearly as high-maintenance diva-ish as it sounds, since the water is filtered instantly and fills his cup up in a few seconds.)

No more over-priced, wasteful bottled water from vending machines, no more lamenting over non-healthy sugary beverage options, and no more babbling like a crazy person to other moms at the water fountain over their brilliant cup solution and that MINE'S IN THE MAIL MINE'S IN THE MAIL WAIT WHERE ARE YOU GOING I JUST THOUGHT IT WAS AN AWESOME COINCIDENCE IS ALL. 

P.S. Ezra got his hands on a Kool-Aid pouch at the party and proceeded to drink at least three of them. He was a PEACH and a HALF the rest of the day. A hyper, shrieky, radioactive peach. OMG. 

Brita has offered me five additional bottles to give away to you guys. Leave a comment on this post between now and next Friday and I will randomly select five comments (via the robot at and then you, too, can be the weirdo on the playground shrieking about your magic filter cup being in the mail. Or, you know, you can be cool about it. Totally your call. 

This post is sponsored by the Brita Bottle for Kids. Learn more at Facebook, Twitter and YouTube. Brita is teaming up with non-profit Alliance for a Healthier Generation to encourage kids to swap out sugary beverages and drink more water. As part of their partnership with the Alliance, Brita will donate more than 4,000 Brita Bottles for Kids to schools across the country to encourage healthy habits in their students.



We love water bottles! Great story!


We love our brita filter pitcher at home - a water bottle version would be great!


I always serve water at parties, but only because I don't want to have to clean up juice spills! I'd like one of these filters, fingers crossed!


That built in filter is genius. I think i would take one with me everywhere.


Would love one for my boys

Suzy Q

To heck with the kids. I want one of these for ME! (I also have no kids)


I would love one of these for my son!!!


You can buy the Bobble at Target. At least in CA we can. Would love to try the Brita though.

Melissa D

OH MY GOODNESS! I would LOVE one! My little girl is about to turn 1 at the end of the month and she has fallen in love with water! He is ridiculously allergic to milk and that's all people offer little ones (which is better than sugary drinks, but much deadlier to us). We also live in a small town where the water from the tap is sketchy and when we are at home we fill up with bottled water, but out and about sucks. BRITA TO THE RESCUE! She's also learning to drink from my sports top water bottles so it would be perfect. Heck, if I don't win I might just get one anyways.


Could definitely use this. My 3 year old son has SPD and he also really can't have any artificial coloring in anything or I'm dealing with the fallout for days. Oh, and no juice either since I'll see that in the diaper for days :P


sigh. I'm still in hobbit-foot-ville. But the water bottle is nifty!




Oh God. So we were at a family BBQ earlier this summer and my kid, who was maybe 1 1/2 at the time got his hands on a juice box. And when he drained that one, asked his grandma for another one. And another one. Annnnnd another one. And the greatest picture of all time is my adorable wonderful fantastic funny child clad in only a diaper (because we had been swimming) shaking a keg of beer, screaming at the top of his lungs "Juuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuice Booooooooooooooooox!!!!" because they ran out. It was totally Shatneresque. Now, if he can get into the fridge and he spots the small stash of juice boxes I keep (for bribery purposes) he stomps around the house "juiceboxjuiceboxjuiceboxjuicebox" until he either gets one or I figure out which shiny object will distract him. I hope to god he never gets his hands on any Kool Aid.

Jessica Smith

I'd love this for my three year old. I have one for myself and hoard it and don't share well with others!


Awesome, I'm in!


Oh those are brilliant! If I can't win one, I'll have to buy it!


I would love one of daughter is only allowed water/coconut milk :)


Those bottles look pretty cool. If I don't win one, I think I'll still be getting one anyway! LOL


I like the bottle! My almost 17-month old only knows of milk and water as beverages. We are meanies and have not even introduced juice. :)


I like the bottle! My almost 17-month old only knows of milk and water as beverages. We are meanies and have not even introduced juice. :)


I was planning on getting a Kiddie Camelback for my L.O. tomorrow, but this sounds much better with the fancy filter and all. Pick me, Robot, PICK MEEEEEE!!!


Very cool, I didn't know they made these in kids size!! Sign me up!!


We made it to 7 on the water / watered down juice. If only we'd had a cool Brita bottle to carry with us, we might have made it further....


I would love one of those. I'm getting all crunchy granola mom lately and that would just be the organic cherry on top.


Oh Please pick kids all decided they need new shoes this month so we have no money for extras!


Ooooo, I want!


Oh, I need this. Pick me. Thanks. And I fully admit that my kids drink soda at restaurants and I fully regret it as soon as they do but there's no reversing that knowledge of how yummy root beer is.


I want! Mememememe! Thx:)


Oh yes, I'm the mean parent who will only buy Capri Sun 100% juice and not the Roarin Waters kind which will make Roarin Children if they drink it. We NEED that Brita bottle.


I would love to have one of these for my 5 year old. He is on the spectrum and has just now started to drink water. He stopped drinking milk, sadly, juice has always been on the menu, but water is the "new" thing and I am so thrilled about it. It's the small things that make me happy.


OK, I gotta confess that my 18-month old only drinks water and milk. Not even juice. And sometimes he rejects the milk in favor of water. What a weirdo, I know. But it'd be great to have a filtering bottle, especially at our cabin which does not have running water.


My kids don't drink soda either, although my almost-7-year-old just discovered that it's actually quite tasty. Bummer. I hope I can give her a nifty new water bottle instead!


It's so cute!


Despite the slim chances of me winning, I think I may pick one up for Squirt. Despite it being perfectly fine I swear our tap water has a taste to it. Although that may be due to all the pipes being installed behind our building, but I'm trying not to think to hard about that. Yuck.


i buy the polar seltzer in orange vanilla (so good!) and let my daughter go nuts. it's bubbly and tastes good and she's none the wiser.

i am/was going to buy one of those water bottles but hey, maybe i can win one first! wee!


OOOOOOO I NEED one. NEED. if I don't win I suppose I'll just have to go to target and actually buy a few I GUESS.


Those sound awesome - for my two-year-old and for me!!


I love that Brita is partnering with Alliance for a Healthier Generation! Very cool!


I want one!!


Hoping this one will replace the 1000000000000 water bottles hanging out in my cabinets, closets, cars, etc!!!!!!!!!

Victoria B

I love this idea!


Brilliant idea! Had never thought of it before now, but they should have invented this years ago - would have saved me a lot of irritation/gross tasting water/wasted money on bottled water.

Sue C

Need to get this for my niece! What a great idea!

Sue C

Need to get this for my niece! What a great idea!

Sue C

Need to get this for my niece! What a great idea!


I love Brita water pitchers. I think the kid sports bottle is equally awesome.


That is a great idea. Hate being stuck having to buy bottled water when we don't plan ahead.

Jennifer Rupert

I am totally with you. My son Evan drinks water or milk. When we give him juice it has veggies in it. And he loves that green juice smoothie with the spinach and broccoli in it. My husband and I have those bottles but my son doesn't. I need to get him one.


I would love one of these bottles!


I might go buy one now!!! eeeeee!


This would be great. We made an unexpected stop today to play on inflatable slides ($10 per kid) and then had to spend another $7 to get water and juice.


We buy the fridge size bottled water for our fridge! It would be cheaper to pay a plumber the $450 to install a fridge spout in the kitchen. But alas, we do not have that $. A Brita bottle would save us tonnes of money! I may just go out and buy one and cross my fingers that you can send us another!!


I love water bottles...and so do my kids. AND, so you do and YOUR kids! How cool is that?


Well, I'm not even sure why I'm entering because even if I were to win, I'll still definitely be ordering 4 more, but you know. One free isn't bad.


Pick me robot thingy!


Oh, let me be the weirdo! Oh, let me!

P.S. If you manage to read all these comments, what would you recommend to an enthusiastic-if-not-talented cake decorator who would like to stop using artificial colors? What are some other good options for making cake PURDY?

Thank you!


I'd love one!


Me! Me! We had to give our daughter Hawaiian punch the other day due to lack of options. Way too much sugar for her tummy. You know what looks exactly the same when it is thrown up? Hawaiian punch. :(


Very cool water bottle! Would LOVE one!!


Awesome. I'm not going to wait to win one (I never am the lucky one). Hope they have them at Target!


My girls dont drink soda either, and we've been in the same situation at kid parties. I would be so pleased for you to "randomly" choose me. If you dont, I guess Ill buy the dang thang!! PS Nice Pedi


I think that is BRILLIANT! Would love to win one but also intend to buy a few. For kids and adults.


I would love one. Because then I'd only have to buy one more for the other kid and we'd be all set.


What a great invention! Please pick me!


Me me me! I would love one of those!

Becca Lynn

Hi. Commenting, though I never win ANYTHING. But yeah... Radioactive peach. Has my kid been talking to your kid? Sorry bout that.


Would love to try one of these out!!! Water fountain water sometimes tastes just horrid and my little ones refuse to drink it if its icky...


My kids' school was selling root beer floats the other day as a fund-raising effort, and then Chuck E Cheese made a visit to campus to publicize another fund-raising event. I asked the principal if she'd let the Marlboro Man on campus if the school got a cut of the profits.


Awesome for school lunches!!


Of course, my 12 yo doesn't drink water. Too much exposure to sugar drinks everywhere. Right now he's stuck on strawberry milk at least.

Amy A

that would be AWESOME! Even if I don't win one, I'm totally buying one.


Wow. I'm going to have to go buy a couple of these! One kid's immune suppressed, and the other hates to be left out and therefore gets all the cool stuff I purchase to protect his brother's immune system!


these are new to me, love the idea!

RM in MA

Would love to be the recipient of this genius contraption


Not sure if my kid is sensitive to the additives, but having water at the ready is pretty awesome...


A 4 yo boy (born days before Ezra) and a 2 yo
Girl & I confess to giving them apple juice @ least 1x day. I'd love to try the Brita!


This would be great to carry around in my purse/bottomless-carry-all bag. ;)

Thanks for the giveaway!


I want one I want one! :D


These sound great!


Ooh! How do I get them to donate some of those 4000 bottles to MY school?!


The bottle is a great idea. I have the not so cute and larger version at the office. A child size bottle is a good idea even though the last birthday party we attended there was no need. The beverages served were water and milk. The only concession to it being a birthday party, the kids could choose white or chocolate milk. The kids goodie bags had sugar-free gum, raisins, stickers, little toys. The only thing sweet the entire day was the cake and ice cream.

Jessica C

YES I want one! And I kind of can't believe that Kool-aid thing happened in DC given the anti-juice patrol and all..


Pick me! Pick me!


Pick me, pretty robot! Pick me!!


OMG. we'd totally love one of those. I have a bobble which i love, but leave it at work, becuase gross nasty water there...


fingers crossed! My 9 yo and my 6 yo both had the same reaction to soda and have never let it cross their lips since. I am hoping it continues. They drink milk or water at home and school, with the occasional lemonade or juice box at friends houses. I'd love one of these water bottles! Thanks for the chance!


I would love, love, love to have one of these! What a great idea!

Barb in Phx

Would love one for my dear grandson! (BTW, I really enjoy your blog. It's in my must-read folder on google reader.)


Wish they were around when my children were young, but I'd love to have them for my grand kids!! Love Brita! Use it every day to filter my water which is all I drink!!


This is a great idea! What an informative sponsored post!
Also, yikes! I am now afraid of the day that birthday parties will include soda options.


Once upon a time, my mother in law gave my 14 month old a sip of her diet soda right before bedtime just because he wanted some, and I nearly divorced the family. Another time, they ran out of the bottled water that they buy (because they think they don't like the taste of filtered tap water and refuse to get a Brita like a normal family), and suggested that we just all drink soda instead. Please see my earlier reaction. We are a water, milk, waaaaatered down juice kind of family, as well. No soda, thanks. But a portable Brita? Genius!

Rebecca S.

Fabulous idea, especially since I am chronically disorganized when it comes to remembering the child's water sippee cups... Love the idea of leaving it in my bag!

Rebecca Hathorne

These look awesome. I've seen a larger version at the gym but a smaller, kid friendly one would be ideal. Here's to hoping we win one! :)


I hope they have these in adult size too! My main problem with kids water bottles is that my kiddos are always wanting more to drink. Though the filtering part would help there...

Ashley W

Ooh ooh, pick me! I would love one of those! :-)


Those "spill proof" sippy cups have ruined more than one super important grocery list/phone number/driving directions. They are made of lies.

lisa s

Sounds like I can be less responsible but look more responsible. Right up my alley.


My oldest reacts similarly to food dyes. It's difficult even for her to have cake with icing. And all three of my kids think soft drinks are too "spicy" and refuse to drink them. Which is fine by me!

That water bottle would come in handy pretty much anywhere we go!


Sounds great - no soda in this household.


Hang in there with the soda thing. I also had my kids convinced they didn't like soda until they were old enough to make their own choices. My 15 year old son, still doesn't drink soda, always chooses water or milk with an occasional Gatorade thrown in. My college age daughter as well, rarely drinks soda either. The dream can come true!

The comments to this entry are closed.