Productivity Central
Oh Good She's Writing About Not Sleeping Again That's Always Fun

Ceiba's Complaintz

Ceiba has requested an opportunity to respond to yesterday's post

GURL, CRY ME A FREAKING WATER DISH.

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U HAZ NO IDEA THE WEEK I HAZD.

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WHEN I WAS INSIDE I WANTED OUTSIDE. ONCE I GOT OUTSIDE I NO LONGER WANTED TO BE OUTSIDE AND YET I REMAINED OUTSIDE AND IT WAS AWFUL.

SAME DEAL WITH UR BEDROOM DOOR, GURL. WHY U CLOSE IT? GOOD NEWS IS I HAZ ALMOST FINISHED SCRATCHING OFF ALL THAT NEW PAINT U PUT ON IT.

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UR WELCOME.

I REMAIN UNABLE TO STOP THE MADDENING FLOW OF MAIL NO MATTER HOW MUCH I FEROCIOUSLY BARK LIKE FEROCIOUS DESTROYER OF MAIL. YEARS, I HAVE BEEN AT THIS. SO MANY FUTILE, WASTED YEARS. 

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AM GREY FROM STRESS OF IT ALL. 

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TELL THE MEDIUM ONE THANX FOR BRUSHING ME WITH THE WOODCHIP, THO. WAS WEIRD BUT ALSO KINDA WORKED AND I DUG IT.

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THAT ONE OKAY IN MY BOOK. WE PALZ AND SHIT.

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BUT BACK TO MY PROBLEMZ.

1. WHEN U GUYZ MADE MEATBALLS THE SMALL ONE ONLY FED ME TWO MEATBALLS. OUTRAGE.

2. I AM REALLY TIRED OF CHEERIOS. TELL CHILDREN TO DROP SUMTHING DIFFERENT.

3. BTW STOP CALLING ME 'ROOMBA' THAT JOKE STOPPED BEING FUNNY 40 HUNDRED WAFFLES AGO.

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LOVE,

CEIBA

Max 8-2-13

P.S. Learn to use the shift key, you overgrown bat-eared ferret. God.

Comments

Jean

Was Ezra using Chip? He still has Chip? I love Ceiba...and I love the tocks picture :)

souphead

i love love love that Ceiba "talks" in ALL CAPS. I am crying with laughter at my desk.

Kari Weber

Every time you post about your animals I just smile. I am so glad that there is someone else out there that has given their animals complete and individual personalities and voices. It makes me feel less crazy. Even my four year old knows how our dogs "sound" and will speak for them! Cracks me up!

Tricia

"The medium one" lol!!! Thanks for the giggles!

Elizabeth

When did Ceiba get so gray around the muzzle?!

Lucy

Ugh, I feel you on the bedroom door. He can open our daughter's door if he hits it hard enough, so that one isn't as bad, but then he assumes (despite 8 years of evidence to the contrary) that he can do the same to ours, and, well, gouging. We're getting ready to paint up there and are seriously debating whether it's worth it. What you're telling me is... no?

Wendy

My dog will no longer eat green beans or cheerios....guess he has finally realized something better will eventually come along.

Wendy

My dog will no longer eat green beans or cheerios....guess he has finally realized something better will eventually come along.

Christine

Wow, Ceiba is going grey, now you mention it. I've been reading your blog a long time.

Love "the medium one" too.

ListenMaudy

I love when Ceiba posts! So adorable. :D

sheilah

"overgrown bat-eared ferret" hehehe...love you Max (and Amy).

supertiff

ceiba's got 99 problems, but the medium child ain't one.

Amy

Max! I love it when he makes an appearance!

Sue

Roomba with a mop attachment. That's what I call our Jack Russell.

Haley

I love Ceiba! And I'm delighted to know that Dexter isn't the only one that has issues with a shut bathroom door. He's all try and close it, woman. I'll just repeatedly body slam my ten pound self into it while you do your thing.

skroll63

That is hilarious. I needed that today. Thank you for the laughs!

Anette

Funniest post evvah! Has me snorting. Luv long time reader! Your norwegian reader!

Jenn S

i had to tell you this, but couldn't post it on the original post because the comments were closed...you posted about Ike not calling you mama anymore, and urged those whose babes were still saying it to go record it. well, i thought that was a great idea, so i did. two days - yes, TWO DAYS later, my toddler started calling me MOMMY, and hasn't switched back. OMG. i had a big happy pregnant lady cry because i still had him saying mama on video, thanks to you!!!

Arnebya

I love that the medim one still has Mr. Woodchip. I just do.

Laura

I had to stop reading for like 5 minutes because I was laughing so hard about the wood chip. My dog, who was sleeping next to me, was not amused.

Kim

I lost it at "you overgrown bat eared ferret"

I needed that laugh, thank you!

Julia

oh Ceiba, I love you.

MariaV

Ceiba! I've missed you. The middle ones are the best.

Barb

Ceiba - it's the children making you grey. I know of what I type.

M. Butterfly

Aww, Max and Ceiba! I remember when Ceiba was a just 4-pound puppy. :)

Amy

LOL! I love you Ceiba

Amalah

@Elizabeth The white hair started almost immediately after she was hospitalized for liver failure (aka That Time Our Dog Ate Fertilizer From Our Flower Pots And Almost Died And Cost All The Monies). Stress, probably, poor thing. She's only eight!!

Nancy

Great post. Is it Max's turn next week? Hope so.

Mary

MAAAAAAAAAAX!! <3

I hope he gets to make a post too!

Ceiba is adorable, as normal. :)

Netsirk

When you snap her alone, she looks so big. And then you put her next to the middle one, and I remember...not so much.

I like her relationship with the middle one. And the wood chip.

Elisabet M

I am quite certain that was EXACTLY what that dog was thinking! I am waiting for the day that the Japanese really do come up with some gizmo to translate dog barks. And then I can be certain that my dog looks at me and says, "Get off the couch and feed me, woman!"

Jenn

LOL. Roomba.

My husband suggested that we get a Roomba but we have a Great Pyrenees and the Roomba would just explode, or Roomba it's little robotic self right out of our house in protest.

Becca Lynn

This post may be in my top 10 Amalah's most hilarious. Srsly.

Jess

Ceiba and Max!! I love their posts. So so much. More please! :)

Suzy Q

Oh, Ceiba. You killz me ded.

amymvr

Oh the doors. I plan to help our dog write a biography "Barley, My Life on the Wrong Side of the Door."

Andrea

oy! I am 90% certain I do not want to know what my dog is thinking. He has been giving me dirty looks since October 10, 2004 when we brought the loud hairless beast home from the hospital!!!
He has also greyed in proportion to my husband's level of greyness so I am fairly convinced it is child induced.
His grumpiness has too - just this morning he growled at me for having the audacity to want to dry myself with the towel he had just finish fashioning into a lovely nest...

CJ

Your pet posts make me laugh out loud.

Cheryl S.

Love Ceiba and Max!

My daughter thinks it's hysterical that I talk for the cats (and the new dog -- bane of the cats' existence)

Anna

Okay, this has to be one of my favorite posts of yours! So funny!

Heather

LMAO! Best post in a long time! I love Ceiba.

lindsay

I totally had the voice of Wanda Sykes going through my head.reading as Ceiba...cracked me up.

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