My in-laws came to visit this weekend in honor of Noah's and Ezra's collective Neverending Birthday Season, and on Friday night my mother-in-law asked Jason and I if we wanted to them babysit so we could go o-
Amy & Jason: SORRY CAN'T HEAR YOU WE'RE ALREADY IN THE CAR BYE
Okay, so we took the time to make a dinner reservation and buy tickets for an 8 pm showtime of Gravity. I also spent a couple minutes de-diaper-bagging one of my handbags. I dumped out diapers and wipes and spare outfits, the extra Take n' Toss cup that might have been clean but who are we kidding here, a bib and some granola bars and bug spray and wadded up tissues. I added a powder compact and a lip gloss and high tailed it out of there, leaving behind a magnificant pile of child-related crap on my kitchen counter.
At dinner, I went to retrieve the compact and discovered that I'd missed a few things:
Clockwise, from top left:
1) Elmo figurine
2) Isle of Sodor refugee James
3) Naughty cop/dominatrix éclair from Wreck-It Ralph
4) Two (2) goddamn Lightning McQueens (from our collection of fourteen goddamn dozen)
5) Socks (Ezra's)
6) LEGOS (Noah's)
7) Crayon (chewed on)
I am particularly proud of how beautifully color-coordinated everything is to both the restaurant's placemats and the ruby red of my wine. (Not to mention Jason's phone. BECAUSE WE ARE A TEAM.)
Anyway, I am hard at work cobbling Ezra's birthday video together — I asked him if he had a favorite song he'd like me to use and he picked Let's Have a Kiki by Scissor Sisters. That is either a subversive win or huge fail for me, either way I think I'm sticking with something with fewer muthafuckahs in it.
He also drew me this picture, which initially reminded me of a character from the Mr. Men books.
Amy: He's so cute, Ezra! I like his hat.
Ezra: Yes! And he's also going pee-pee and poop.
(THAT'S A WIN.)