You Can't Stop the Lego
Pet Updates & Things That Are Not Poop

Tipsy Not Tired

So which three of y'all won Powerball? Can I borrow a couple mil? No? FIne. Guess I'll just have to keep blogging.

If you follow me on Instagram, you know full and well that Ike is not tired. Ike is never tired. Ike is now four-and-a-half years old and has not taken a proper afternoon nap since we got rid of the crib, and the mere suggestion that he might possibly be tired and would benefit from a nap is met with bansheed shrieks and protests because he is HASHTAG NOT TIRED. 

Ten minutes later, everything is quiet because he's fallen dead asleep wherever he was at the time. 

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I've learned to just roll with it. At least there's carpet here?

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A couple days ago he crawled on my lap and asked for a hug, mumbled something about not tired...and promptly dozed off. 

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Yesterday morning, he woke up very distressed and going on and on about drinking too much water. "I drank too much water," was all I could get from him, over and over again. "There's too much water in me!"

Then he laid down in his closet and went back to sleep. 

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Okay, so no school for that one, I decided. Maybe nausea or some other virus? Highly doubtful he was able to actually consume that much water from the tiny little cups we keep by their toothbrushes and whatever, this child rarely makes a lick of sense. I put him back in bed, moved a trash can in just to be safe, then left to do some work while he slept. 

That didn't last long, as the minute he realized he was in his bed the protests started. He was hungry! He needed milk! Why was he in bed being deprived of basic sustenance, you monster, when he is so clearly NOT TIRED. 

Fine. I set him up with some bland breakfast foods and milk, eyeing him like you're gonna make me regret this, aren't you, then went back upstairs.

Silence followed, which could mean only one thing...

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"I not tired." he told me. "I just resting on the soft."

After his second catnap of the morning, he perked up. No vomiting, no fever, no complaints. He ate a big lunch and amused himself with toys the rest of the day until his brothers came home.

(He actually put on his coat and waited for them on the front steps, because he wanted to tell them about the Most Horrible Thing I Did To Him That Day, which was that I misplaced the ear thermometer and had to check his temperature using an oral thermometer, which: Dude. You don't even WANT to know about the third option, okay?)

I dropped him off at preschool this morning and didn't really know how to explain his absence. "I think he was just really tired?" I told his teacher. 

Ike overheard me. "I not tired!" he protested. "I just had too much to drink!"

And then we all died laughing, because omg, the end. 

Comments

Kirsten

I think we all can relate Ike. Totally get it. I actually end up trying to claim the opposite "no, not hungover, not at all, I'm just 'tired' "

Jen

Yeah, my 9 year old son would not admit he was tired, EVER! He was just "Worn out!", but sometime in the last year he did finally start saying he was tired. I love that Ike can and will fall asleep anywhere! That's the best!

Stacy

I have several pictures of me taken when I was about Ike's age, sleeping in various places. I don't remember being asked if I wanted to take a nap, because I was not a child who protested naps. I think it was just the unsupervised 70s and I just took advantage of the nearest horizontal surface. I think Ike will love these pictures in the future.

Ladotyk

How funny, the same mysterious over-tired thing happened with my daughter yesterday too, complete with sending her to bed with a just-in-case bucket. It's the sleeping sickness!

Dawn

One of these days, I am going to remember I shouldn't read your blog while I am at work and supposedly working. Spreadsheets just are not convincingly amusing enough to explain the sudden snorts of laughter.

Karen

I did the same thing. Unexplained Workplace Laughter...the new Lol is UWL.

blu_canary

I'm being forced to be vertical and stuff and all I want to do is rest on the soft, too, Ike. I feel your pain. (And the having too much to drink? Totally made me snort laugh.)

Amy A

Ike is hilarious. The picture of him passed out in the hallway will be something to show his frat bros someday. Or not. Probably not.
My son used to do the same thing. I have many, many pictures of him asleep in wagons, in the dog's bed (while the dog ever so patiently slept on the floor beside him) and every conceivable surface other than his bed. Kids are just--weird.

Stephanie

Count me in as another one who just snorted out loud at work. Bravo for Ike admitting that he just drank too much. I usually just lie and say I'm tired.

Solmaz

I think Ike should begin blogging. He is absolutely ready.

liz

That boy has cornered the market in adorable.

skroll63

OMG, I burst out laughing at the end! Too funny!

suburbanmom2

OMG, adorable...and 4 1/2yrs old! How did that happen?!

Mar

I just laughed so! Indeed Ike, just drank too much. Go ahead and rest on the soft. LOL

Sue W.

He is practicing for when he goes off to college! I'm NOT tired, I've just had too much to drink!
Reminds me of when we were in New Orleans. We'd had a great afternoon tying one or twelve on at Pat O'Brien's and as we were stumbling back to our hotels, my hubby uttered the quote that I shall put on his tombstone. "I'm drunk, but it's ok, it's the alcohol that caused it." College boyz r so smaht!

Melissa

I just LOL'd from my office. "No Im not reading blogs! All this paperwork is hysterical!"

That hand over the railing undid me.

Stacey

OMG.dying over here! This kid is something else.

I rarely post, but I read you religiously.

Love, love love!

Feisty Harriet

Bahahahahahaha!!

xox

Dana

I don't know how some kids do that, my son has never even once in his life fallen asleep somewhere random while playing. He will fall asleep in someones arms, bed, or carseat - nothing else no matter how tired he is. Those pictures of Ike are adorable and I just wish my little guy was better at going to sleep when he clearly needs it!

Lauren

I was at least 25 before I used the "too much to drink" reason. But now that I'm old, "I was tired" is much more common. ~ L

Nann

Ike is both adorable and hilarious in general, but have you had his blood sugar checked? Do the random naps coincide with meals? Just throwing it out there.

denise

He is precious but I immediately wondered about his blood sugar as well. Probably fine but my mind goes there when I hear tired and drinking too much.

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