Throwback Beauday
Blank the Dog

My Brand is Crisis

Before I left for my (brief, more-time-on-planes-than-on-the-ground) trip to California (for all of one day at the Mom 2.0 Summit), I had a LOT of shit to get done. Important shit. Like this:




My track record for chaperoning field trips in horrible weather remains almost impeccable. If there's an outdoor activity planned, the temperature will inexplicably drop 20 degrees that day. If there's a hayride involved, it's going to rain, so prepare yourself for a damp butt. 

I was supposed to chaperone Noah's fourth-grade field trip to Annapolis that morning, before realizing I was double-booked. Triple booked, actually, because Ezra had a doctor's appointment to get his hearing re-checked, so Jason had to cover that one, right before I bailed on him for the next two days. Whoops.

So yeah. Ezra recently failed a hearing screen at school. Just like he failed a hearing screen back in preschool. That time a follow-up revealed nothing out of the ordinary, and the doctor suggested that he was just too little to understand the testing instructions. This time the follow-up revealed that his eardrums are misshapen. That's usually is the result of chronic ear infections or allergies, neither of which really applies to Ezra. Unless he's had like, stealth ear infections that he didn't complain about. Which: Maybe? I don't know. Ezra's always been more of our chronic stomach bug kid, and Noah had the ear infections. (He's passed multiple hearing screens with flying colors) Also: My kid not complaining about something? Seems unlikely. 

Either way, we're in wait-and-see mode for a few months before he goes back for a re-check. In the meantime I'm suddenly aware of how much of the EZRA! EZRA! EZRA!-related yelling I do might be tied to the fact that my kid can't hear me. 

So that's just another great thing going on. Now back to the travel-related fallout.

Before I left for the airport post-field trip, I went over the next day's mundane list of reminders with Jason. Ike stays for lunch on Fridays, so don't forget to pack something for him. Noah needs to bring his recorder for music, he forgets ALL THE TIME and it's impacting his grade. Ezra needs to return his library book AND his homework packet, he forgets ALL THE TIME and it's impacting his grade. 

After I landed I texted J to let him know I arrived, followed by: LUNCH. RECORDER. LIBRARY BOOK. HOMEWORK. Also maybe something about loving him, but that wasn't the important one.

I woke up in beautiful California the next day to a string of texts revealing that nothing on that list happened, and everybody went off to school missing an important part of their day. (To be fair, he'd woken up to a major work crisis that threw the whole morning off.) 

I asked him how Noah's field trip went and he told me to check my email, where there was a report from his teacher about Noah's behavior. Which was not good. Like not listening to teachers or tour guide not-good. Not staying with the group not-good. Literally running out into traffic not-good. 

As the litany of things forgotten and things in minor-to-major crisis went on, I finally was like YOU KNOW WHAT ENOUGH ABOUT ALL THIS HOW'S THE DOGGGGGGG?

He's good. Beau is good. 

Okay then. Because otherwise I might have just gotten right back on the airplane and gone home. 


And that would have been a bummer. 

(I left all of 24 hours later, but can you blame me? I was clearly needed elsewhere.)



St. Regis Monarch? I've been there. It's awesome.


It seems like it never ends, doesn't it? Reeling from crisis to crisis as the children come up with something new to freak you out and two careers (one of which covers the majority of bills) juggle back and forth.
I have 3 boys too but mine are spread out a little more and one is a teenager. That's when the real fun begins, you can wrestle a 2 yo into his room to quiet down from a tantrum but you have to rely entirely on parental authority for the bigger than you teenager.
Luckily the dog is good!


Hey! My kid was diagnosed with fairly major hearing loss in kindergarten. Imagine what an asshole I felt like for all the times I was pissed at her little 5 year old self for ignoring me, when in reality, her back was turned and she had no idea I was speaking. Total gut kick.

Now she's 15 and uses it as plausible deniability when she doesn't do what she's told to do. The guilt, it's subsiding.


I love traveling 1000+ miles away for business and then fielding late evening calls/texts about shit going wrong at home. And I am expected to do what about it? Just listen to the venting, i tell myself. Just listen.


One possible upside-ish comment: I wonder if Ezra's attention issues as reported at school could be that he was having trouble hearing and thus his attention was wandering?


I wander over to your blog occasionally via links from links from someone. I don't have kids but I do have hearing loss. As someone said, not hearing can look like an attentional problem, but also: it takes extra concentration to parse speech into meaning if you're not hearing well, like a bad phone connection or a movie in not-your-first language. This leaves less brainpower for processing that meaning once you figure it out. And sometimes the brain just gives up and decides words are background noise. Teach him to watch the person's mouth, get closer, ask for repeats... and don't do a whole lot of "wait and see" without asking tons of questions.


As someone who was born with about 30% hearing loss (and a cleft lip! Hooray birth control babies!) and who, at 30, tests at the hearing level of a 65 yr's not that bad! Again, I can absolutely hear, just not super well, but the only way I've ever felt disadvantaged by it is my inability to bartend. I'd be an awesome bartender, so that is a bummer for me, but it's not the worst thing in the world to be ruled out for your child. (My parents are THRILLED, of course)


I know this is the least important thing in your entire post to pick up on, but is it possible for Noah to have an "at home" recorder for practising and an "at school" one that never leaves the music room? My brother had ADHD, couldn't remember anything or keep anything organized, and used a similar solution in elementary school.


Also going for the easy solution here; Noah could even keep the "at school" recorder in his backpack so that he can be just like the other kids (it never leaves the backpack at home). My son has Aspergers, and this is our solution.


I'm glad you got to go to the conference. My oldest daughter had mild hearing loss when she was around 6. I took her to an audiologist who said, you know sometimes kids just ignore us. Before we test her, are you sure that's not what's happening? Nope. She sang lyrics wrong to a song so straightforward I wanted to bang my head into the wall. Nobody fucks up Whitney on purpose.


My 12 year old (ADD ODD) is going on his first school field trip. I'm in full panic mode, he's staying in a room with 3 other 12 year old boys. Does this sound like anything goid can come of it??? Cross your fingers and throw good thoughts that I don't get the call to pick him up.

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