Last night we took the kids out for dinner. We'd heard about a nice-sounding restaurant with a "kids eat free" night on Sundays, and we're always, ALWAYS trying to find places that fall within that elusive category of Noah Can Order A Damned Grilled Cheese Sandwich But Mommy And Daddy Can Order Something Besides A Damned Cheeseburger. This place looked like it might fit the bill. I missed the thing on their website about the magician, though. We didn't know about the magician until our waiter stopped by to check in on us -- yes, yes, everything is fine! The... Read more →

What It Looks Like

A lot of families, as part of the path to diagnosis and treatment, videotape their children's behavioral...quirks, I guess. Tics. Possible symptoms. Just so the doctors or therapists or evaluators can "see" what you see at home. We've never done that, at least on purpose. Noah's school does a lot of videotaping for therapeutic/assessment purposes, but I've always just INTENDED to capture the normal happy fun stuff. I say "intended" because if I go through old videos of Noah I'm often kind of retroactively shocked by something we inadvertently captured that's like, "THAT. RIGHT THERE. THAT TURNED OUT TO BE... Read more →

Not Exactly Fearless Blogging

About 10 minutes or so into the Blogging Autism panel at BlogHer, the table surface started to get all fuzzy and my eyeballs felt hot. "Shit, I'm not gonna make it," I mumbled to Christina, as we'd already briefly debated the odds of getting through the session without crying. Nothing had even been SAID yet, beyond introductions to the panelists and the theme for the discussion, and yet there I was, hiding my reddening face behind my conference schedule as the weight of the previous days with Noah decided to drop from the ceiling and land squarely on my chest.... Read more →

Backwards Motion

It's been a tough week. Power outages, Mamapop outages, booze outages, oh my. And then there's Noah. Noah...well. Noah has not been receiving any real occupational therapy since school ended, and it's showing. It's showing HARD. He's a ball of tics, all of a sudden. A ball of walking, wiggling, finger-chewing, repetitive stimming behaviors. He speaks in scripts, he lives in rituals. He doesn't walk, he runs, while shaking his limbs and making vibrating-like noises with his mouth while every person in the area turns to stare because what the...? Ice cream is too cold, macaroni and cheese is too... Read more →

Dear Insurance Company: Please Define "Effective"

Our insurance stopped covering Noah's occupational therapy back in November -- conveniently, right around the time we hit our out-of-network deductible, and actual promised benefits would actually have to be paid by them, but they indicated that they'd be happy to consider an extension of the coverage, so long as we provided them with X, Y and Z. Two months later, they came back and said that actually, could we also send them W? And expand on Y? And provide some background on Z? And we did, and Noah's therapists did. We got doctor's notes and his school typed up... Read more →

Old Hat, Cont'd.

Camp, day two. Huddled at B&N again with, unfortunately, no wallet. Hiding behind a...pillar thing so the Imaginary Authority Figures don't catch me poaching free wifi despite not purchasing anything. Though I would love to purchase something! Maybe one of those Twitter marketing books could tell me how to beg for spare change. If every Rockville-based follower stopped by with a nickel I'd be halfway to a latte right now! Where are you assholes? God, but social media is useless. I've now been officially singled out as an Old Timer at the drop-off and pick-up. Mothers are all but sidling... Read more →

Backpacks, Loops & Spoons

Today's the last day of school. There are parties, ridiculous fake graduations, special year-end slideshows. I'm bringing the napkins and paper plates. Noah wears a backpack now. We can drive around the loop without a bone-melting, ear-piercing tantrum. He can hold a crayon, cut with scissors, ride on the big-kid swings and a merry-go-round. He can write all his letters and his name, and will draw pictures of things he likes from his favorite books. He's starting to read a few words and is really, really good at math. We suspect that what we first assumed was synesthesia is actually... Read more →

A Very Good Weekend

Jason and I overthink the weekends, sometimes. We get our hearts set on elaborate outings that end up being enjoyable for all of 45 minutes but require three times the planning and travel time. We purposely decided not to do that this weekend, and the most ambitious activity we planned was a trip to the playground. We spent a buck-seventy-five apiece to ride the park's miniature train, which to Noah and Ezra, ranks just above everything else in the world in terms of face-melting awesomeness. For Noah, the most thrilling aspect of the train is the fact that he gets... Read more →


In the end, the decision was easier than I thought it would be. Jason and I essentially did a "on the count of three everybody say their gut feeling okay one, two, three" conversation and both blurted out the same answer. And it felt like the right one. Even though it wasn't the answer I originally saw myself choosing, honestly. Not that we haven't revisited the topic over and over and over again since (because oh, Christ, we have, and I am so sick of talking about this, even though I am here on my blog continuing to talk about... Read more →

Choices We're Lucky To Have (But Still Don't Want To Make)

Well. So. That happened. And it was fine. And now I have absolutely no clue what we're supposed to do next. I've been sitting here in a sandwich shop for an hour and a half staring at a bowl of cold soup, trying to string words together, trying to come up with anything else besides: Damn! Fuck! The Immersion Program. It doesn't exist! I mean, it does, but not for kids Noah's age. Kids his age have one basic option: a five-days-a-week version of the class he's in now, though with more of a focus on the kindergarten transition. And... Read more →