Ezra lost a tooth over the weekend, obviously an exciting moment for him...but now that all three of them are in their peak tooth-losing years, it's become less of milestone for us and more of a endless mouth-based cash-sucking scam. (I swear there was one week last month where Noah lost a molar at the dinner table almost every night. Which 1) wow, there's nothing quite like the sight of children passing around a bloody tooth stump to really help the appetite, and 2) HOW R U EVEN CHEWING, BRO.) Long story short, Jason and I both completely forgot about the lost tooth and whiffed on the tooth fairy duties. I remembered approximately 0.32224 seconds after waking up and jumped out of bed, hoping to catch him sleeping in, but alas, they were already downstairs and poor Ezra was super, mega disappointed. I went down and blathered some lame excuse about how he probably just lost the tooth too late to get added to her list for that night, blah blah she'll surely come tonight. As soon as I walked out of the kitchen I heard Noah drop the truth bomb: NOAH: You know the tooth fairy isn't real, Ezra.... Read more →


I was getting coffee yesterday morning with Lydia when Jason texted. There's a protest at the White House at 1 p.m. I want to go. Noah does too. "Welp. I better get home." I told her. "This is what life is like now, I guess." I got home, changed my shirt, refastened an assortment of buttons and a safety pin to my coat, and put on my ridiculous pink hat. The boys and Jason all changed into Hamilton-themed shirts, while Noah carefully packed up the Declaration, Constitution and Bill of Rights. He also chose a hat. The protest quickly moved from a rally at the White House into a march past Trump's hotel and to the Capitol building (something the Women's March ended up being simply too massive to attempt), so we joined in. For something that was somewhat hastily planned and Jason only spotted somewhat randomly on Facebook, the turnout was insane. The line of marchers -- once a again a wildly diverse, universally peaceful crowd -- went on and on as far as I could see in both directions. Ike took it all in with a bit of baffled wonder, while Ezra understood that we were marching against... Read more →


It's January 17, almost Let's Inaugurate a Lunatic Day, it's cold and grey outside, and I still haven't taken down our Christmas tree, which is dead. Time for a half-assed, hodgepodge post of random, mostly unrelated photos! I made this for dinner and lo, it was good. (We've been mixing it up and trying out a few of the other meal-delivery service options, so this was a Sunbasket recipe.) So good that the kids ate EVERY BITE, declared it their favorite, and then Ezra and Ike made me thank-you necklaces. Which I think went really well with an equally ridiculous dress. The men in my life give me weird things. I also made a lasagna. I was pretty darn proud of it (as evidenced by the multiple photos I took of it for no reason) and the kids ate it just fine, but alas, I was not showered in additional jewelry afterwards. Ingrates. Our weekend was on the touristy side...first Jason took Noah to Fort McHenry in Baltimore while I hosted a playdate for the other two at home.* He had more questions than the park staff were able to answer, but came home full of excitement, along with a... Read more →


It's cold and icy and blah out there, but I seem to have mostly recovered from whatever cold/sinus bullshit was going on last week. Or else I've just accepted that not being able to breathe through my nose super-comfortably is the way I live now, and probably will until spring, when the pollen comes along to fully suffocate me from inside my own face. (Yes, I'm going to see an allergist for testing and shots and all that, but clearly I am not ready to let go of my gloomy pessimism and penchant for colorful language about the mucus situation.) There's shockingly little to report from around here, honestly. The kids get up, go to school, and even the level of morning chaos is at an all-time low. Everybody takes care of their own shit, I float around the edges offering reminders about library books and lunch boxes, then tsk tsk after they've barreled out the front door because we still aren't 100% on clearing your own breakfast dishes or throwing away your banana peel. Speaking of bananas, both real and figurative, Ezra had a playdate this weekend at a neighbor's house. I'm sorry to report that his long-time engagement... Read more →


We're home, at last and finally, after a longer-than-intended pit stop in PA trying to replaced a blown tire on the minivan. No, not THAT tire. That tire was successfully installed and is working just fine. Another tire. There was an incident in Valley Forge involving my in-laws and a wrong turn and conflicting GPS directions and a curb collision while we were still in NYC. So while at least this incident did not involve any more Foyer Tires, the hassle and unexpected expense of it all means 2016 -- along with everything else that was good and pure -- has gone and destroyed the whimsy and weirdness of #TIREWATCH, because neither of us want to hear another word about tires again. 2016, man. Please wrap this shit up already. Our house no longer looks like this, but the aftermath of all of this, plus somehow three times as many Amazon boxes piled up in hallways and corners. And now suitcases and even more gifts from grandparents and friends. Noah came home from school last Friday, sat me down and demanded to know the truth about Santa. Jason and I agreed that we'd continue to play along this year, as... Read more →


Why yes, that is Ezra using Owen the Penis Puppet like a guitar to play along to "Congratulations" from the Hamilton Mixtape while Ike thrashes around with a ukulele butchering the lyrics to "Iron Man" by Black Sabbath so honestly not much else to see here other than a typical Wednesday night for the Storch family, really. Read more →


Ezra brought home a puppet he made in art yesterday. The kids created their own "Wild Thing" and then put on a class puppet show about the book. Ezra was pretty into the project. He told me his puppet's name is Owen. ... ....... ........... I don't think I'm going to ask any more questions about Owen. Read more →


In other, less polarizing news*, you want to know who's doing great? These fools. Or more accurately, these three wise guys. Are just great. Can't really speak for the cat, though. Over the past couple weeks, we've had both all our parent-teacher conferences AND Noah's IEP meeting, re-evaluation/pre-middle-school year edition. Let's recap. Noah's self-confidence has EXPLODED this year (possibly thanks to the social skills program he attended over the summer, plus a med switch that's been like night and day), and it's showing in just about every aspect possible at school. After almost failing math last year (but turning things around in the last semester), his latest report card was all A's and B's, he enjoys tests and studying and writing, keeps himself organized and on schedule, and is starting to open up to new topics and interests and friends. He continues to be amazingly self-aware and self-advocating, and just overall seems much happier and bubbly and just...yeah. Confident. It's a really good look for him. At his conference, his teacher mentioned his (obvious) love and passion for history and social studies, but said it was a struggle to redirect him from the non-fiction section and into more literary texts... Read more →


Ezra: Mom, I really wish I could learn how to vacuum the floor. Me: ... Me: BEHOLD, I AM MAGIC WISH-GRANTING FAIRY. KNOCK YOURSELF OUT, CHILD. For whatever reason, after school on Monday, Ezra suddenly noticed there were still Cheerios all over the kitchen floor. Now, there are ALWAYS Cheerios all over the kitchen floor, this has been a constant point of crunchy underfoot irritation in my life for damn near a decade now, because the pincer grasp milestone is a crock of shit, but this was the first time any of them actually 1) noticed, and 2) felt compelled to do something about it. Me, again: I got out the vacuum, went over some basics, and barely got in a demo push before Ezra grabbed it out of my hands and went to TOWN on those Cheerios. The kitchen vacuuming quickly turned into bedroom vacuuming, then he decided to take care of the hallways and stairs. Then Ike, I shit you not, asked to join in the fun. Ezra finished off in the living room, tsk tsking over every stray Lego and broken crayon bit he came across and carefully picked up. Ike ran around collecting socks and mittens... Read more →


We took the boys to the National Archives this weekend to see the Declaration of Independence. (The Constitution and Bill of Rights are there too, but for whatever reason Noah decided the Declaration is the most exciting of the three, and thus the main attraction.) Noah and Ezra brought out their Williamsburg hats (paired with Marty McFly and Star Wars outerwear), and also along for the trip were Noah's favorite history book, a Bionicle and of course, miniature American flags for others. (Oh, and a stack of Lego Mixel building instructions that have become incredibly important to Ike for some reason. Hobbes and Mister Doorknob stayed home this time.) We spent more time getting there, waiting in line, and browsing the gift shop than we spent viewing the actual documents. They're a lot more faded than I remembered, and Noah wasn't able to make much out beyond the title and one loop of John Hancock's signature. So he decided to buy a replica and read that instead, using the text from his book to help him decipher the cursive handwriting. His ultimate goal is to memorize the entire thing. I do not see that being all that difficult for him,... Read more →