I don't mean to alarm anyone here, but apparently Thanksgiving is like, really super soon. I know, right? THIS IS BRAND NEW INFORMATION. EVERYBODY PANIC.
But it really did JUST occur to me this morning, and yet here I sit, tappity tap tapping on the glowy Internet box instead of getting my house somewhat company acceptable or making grocery lists or reminding my husband for the millionth that it's his turn to pick up the turkey at the farm, because every year I go, I time it wrong and arrive right when the line is at its most insane. Then I typically lose five hours of my life and at least one child.
(The obvious solution of buying a previously frozen turkey instead of a fresh one, however, is completely unacceptable to me and I would thank you all to shut your whore mouths about it. Let me be alone with my whining! Stop trying to solve my problems!)
My house is a total disaster right now. It's clean and all, but just about every surface needs a good decluttering, and everywhere I look I see a Thing that is supposed to go Somewhere Else, but there's already Another Thing over at Somewhere Else that belongs Elsewhere, and for the life of me I cannot work up the energy to deal with this particular circle of clutter hell, especially since I'm not the one moving any the Things in the first place. Stop it, Thing Gnomes.
My children have made attempts to make our house festive and seasonally appropriate, however. Here, for your Pinterest Holiday Inspiration Boards:
Ezra made this for our centerpiece. It is a turkey that went through a wood chipper.
There is also this delightful collection of rocks on our stairs. I dunno. I didn't ask, but they look important to somebody.
Also festooning our stairs is a futon cover from the basement guestroom. I had to wash it after discovering a large stain of mystery, which I suspect was either Ike spillng a full cup of milk all over it, or possibly a pet barfing up some semi-digested paper towels. Either/or. It's just chillin' here until it dries, which it hopefully will be by the time our first houseguest arrives in a few hours.
(I'm also hoping it will still be its same pre-wash size. I'm not really feeling super confident on that one, but you know. 'Tis the season to say "Fuck it, Who Really Gives a Goddamned Shit?")
Ezra has offered up his wee Halloween pumpkin for pumpkin pie. I thanked him, and then casually mentioned that we'd probably need some supplemental pumpkin in order to have enough for a full-sized pie.
Noah has made ABUNDANTLY clear that his pumpkin is not to be eaten.
I'm going to try to convince him to let his pet pumpkin join us at the table, at least, as a companion for our wood-chipper paper turkey centerpiece. Maybe I'll arrange some of the Stair Rocks around them too. And then have the kids build some LEGO pilgrims! Oh man, this Thanksgiving is going to be baller as all hell.