Great Storch Family Tornado of Destruction Summer Tour 2013

For some unfathomable, completely mysterious reason, we were...not...invited back for a visit with Jason's great-aunt and uncle at the beach this summer. I guess the Great Storch Family Tornado of Destruction Summer Tour 2012 was just too rockin' out. Too radical to the max. Some peeps just can't hang with our flow, our awesomeness, or our overall uncanny resemblance to a traveling mosh pit full of pointy toddlers. So we're going it alone this year. Our usual beach house partners in crime couldn't make it either, thanks to "work" and "no time off" or possibly "DEAR GOD YOU HAVE SO... Read more →

The Search for George Washington

This post is sponsored by Colonial Williamsburg. Book your stay at Whenever I take my children someplace new, I learn something new about them. You'd think I'd remember this and take them to new places more regularly, but instead I tend to overthink trips and destinations and convince myself that no, they're not old enough for that place or well-behaved enough for that one. I get bogged down in logistics (car? train? hotel? packing? gaaaaah?) and completely underestimate my kids' capacity to find something fun about...well, pretty much any place on earth. This past weekend I learned that Noah... Read more →

This Hobbit Be Mobbin'

In spite of...all that happening, I really had a terrifically wonderful time in Vegas. Jason and I successfully and repeatedly committed a good six out of the seven deadly sins — save for wrath, I think. Never really felt too wrath-y, except for that one moment where I thought I overheard a pack of drunk guys calling me a "hobbit" on my crutches and I was all, "EXCUSE ME, ARE YOU SERIOUS?" And then they were all, "What? Nah! We said you were "mobbin' it" on those crutches cuz you were going so fast and shit." And then I was... Read more →

Vegas, Sans Babies

OH HI. I ran off to Vegas. I did not get married or remarried (though I did basically find the wedding chapel OF MAH DREAMS) or spend several days locked on a roof with a chain-smoking monkey. In fact, the biggest trouble I got myself into involved getting mildly scolded by a hotel employee for sneaking into the Microsoft SharePoint 2012 conference without a badge. (Okay, I didn't sneak into the conference itself. I just sat in the developer's lounge and used the wifi for a few hours to edit and post conference-related blog posts.) (I did steal a cup... Read more →

BlogHer 2012, Part One (Which Features Very Little About, You Know, BlogHer)

Oh. Hi. I went to Blogher. While there, I cry-talked about my boobs to Samantha Bee, threw a party, suffered a nervous breakdown about said party, smeared unicorn cake on the faces of friends and strangers, fell down the stairs at a Broadway theater, and then brought a life-sized Harry Potter cardboard stand-up home on the train like an idiot. This morning I woke up to the sound of Noah yelling, "STOP STARING AT ME!" at the cardboard stand-up. Then he punched it. It fell over. "HARRY POTTER, ARE YOU OKAY?" Ezra shouted. (I should mention this was all happening... Read more →

Things We Broke While On Vacation

1) The shower. Okay, first of all, you need to know something about our Ocean City vacations. We stay for free with Jason's great-aunt and great-uncle, who retired there. Who are very nice and gracious and welcoming, but also COMPLETELY KIND OF TERRIFYING. I mean, first, they're in-laws. Distant in-laws. That's baseline intimidating already. And all my in-laws have this quiet, measured, Germanic stoicism about them, which is the complete opposite of my family. We're a bunch of hand-talking Irish drunks with voice immodulation syndrome. Plus...well, they are very particular and set-in-their-ways and they keep their condo impeccably clean and... Read more →

Putt, Putt & Away

We're away AGAIN this week. Visiting family in Ocean City. I know, right? I don't really know what we're thinking, taking all these exhaustifying vacations and creating preshus childhood memories and crap. Speaking of which, the following photo is quite possibly the best representation of life with three children I have ever managed to take. And quite possibly just the greatest photo ever, flat-out: Not to oversell it, or anything. But come on. As sybdix commented (when I posted this on Instagram), this is life with three kids: Carrying one, helping another and trying not to step on the third.... Read more →

Places My Children Insisted They Were Not Tired

At the airport: On the plane: At the dinner table, night #1: At the lunch table, day #2: At the beach: At the beach: At the beach: On the bus back from De Palm Island (home of the water slides): (Not pictured: Ezra, Ike and Mama similarly tanked out in the back row.) At the dinner table, night #3: (TRIFECTA ACHIEVED.) In the crib: In the bed: (More photos at the Amalah's West blog here and here.) Read more →


Oh. Hey. We went away there, for a few days. It did not suck. No. Babble and Westin hotels have been sending a few of us Babble Voices folk to various Westin resorts. They sent us to...Aruba. What the hell, right? We're such assholes. I hate us too, it's okay. I'll be writing about the trip at my Babble blog, of course, but also here, all uncompensated-like, because we took approximately four hundred thousand photos and the campaign at Babble is only five posts, and that means I might not force quite enough of the Internet to stare at my... Read more →

Firemen! Kittens! Tequila! Oh My!

Hey! So anybody remember that little trip I took up to New York City, the one I wasn't allowed to tell you anything about at the time? And a few of you kept occasionally asking me just what in sam hill that was all about and I ignored you until y'all just gave up and stopped asking, because I WILL BREAK YOUR SPIRIT AND YOUR ATTENTION SPAN? Anybody? No? Excellent! Perfect time to bring it back up, then. So after all the secrecy and embargos and hush-hushness about it, I am thrilled to report that I have been cast as... Read more →