I'm Amy. Hiya. I live somewhere in the general whereabouts of Washington, DC with my husband Jason, our overweight Siamese cat Max and our annoying yappy gimpy Miniature Pinscher dog Ceiba (SAY-bah). 

Oh! Right. I also had a baby recently more than one two whole goddamned years ago, oh my hell. His name is Noah. I might mention him now and then.

This website chronicles some really pointless times in my life when I would post drunk and take pictures of my shoes. Then we tried to have a baby for awhile. It made me kind of extremely crazy. Then there was a brief interlude with about a hundred million entries about being pregnant, then a bunch of tantrums about breastfeeding, and now it's back to drunk posts about shoes. We're trying for another baby. It's not going well, but I have better drinking coping skills this time.

Breaking News! I'm pregnant! Project Babalah 2: Electric Boogaloo (credit to reader Ellen for coming up with that one) will be here in October. Dun dun duuuuun.

I used to be an editor for a financial publishing company but I quit because I thought I would get more sleep if I worked from home. Hey, at least I don't have to wear pantyhose anymore. Or pants!

On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays I write an advice column called the Advice Smackdown. I used to write it for this site, but now it's over at AlphaMom.com. Questions about pretty much anything are accepted, although most of them tend to be about hair products. I have a lot of hair products, although I do not claim to have good hair or to know anything about anything, ever. Send your deep personal (or hair) problems to amyadvice[at]gmail.com. (Please don't send super-time-sensitive or personal emails here, pleeeeease. The question queue is very, very crowded. If your question/comment is urgent, i.e. your hair is currently on fire, please use my personal email at the bottom of this page. Thanky!)

I also write a weekly pregnancy calendar for Alpha Mom called Zero to Forty. The main weekly update goes up on Wednesdays, but I sometimes write other things on other days. So visit often! You just never know! Box of chocolates, and all that.

AND (last one, I promise)...just about everyday I write pop culture stuff over at this little blog called Mamapop. I also host open threads in the forums for various reality TV shows, which is just like watching the show with me, in my living room, except that I don't have to share my wine or my chips with you. No offense.

I love wine, Coach bags, Indian food and very high heels. I hate parking lots, carpet and my pores. I am a huge dork. I am absolutely terrified of volcanoes.

If you'd like to say hi, my email is amy[at]amalah.com. I try really hard to always say hi back, but a lot of the time I fail spectacularly. Spectacularly! With jazz hands and everything! TA-DA! I suck!