Mommy Blog THIS, Bitches

A Post That Does Not Contain the Words D-I-A-P-E-R or R-A-S-H

So yes, I suck with the updating all of a sudden. I tease you all by being all diligent and posting every day for awhile, and then my mom shows up to wait on me hand and foot and I decide that napping is much more fun than talking to InternetLand.

Well, it IS more fun. I'm sorry, but I'm tired. I even started an entry about just how tired I am the other day, but it mostly went like this: I am really tired. The end.

I also started an entry about the post office, but I never actually made it to the post office. I had some packages to mail to Zoot and started to walk to the post office, but the post office was ACROSS THE STREET and there was a FedEx store on the side of the street I was walking on and so I decided to FedEx the packages instead and nothing interesting happened at the FedEx store.

Except possibly the realization that no one holds the door open for me anymore, even if I'm laden with packages and a stroller and a newborn and still kind of look pregnant.

Not pregnant enough, apparently. Fucking assholes.

We did have a sort-of interesting lunch when two little old men came over to fuss over Noah, and then the one man went away and the other man would. Not. Leave. And. Kept. Calling. Noah. A. Girl. And telling the same stories over and over again. And asking the same questions over and over again.

My mom guessed it was Alzheimer's because she is Nice. I assumed he was drunk because I am Jaded and Suspicious.

Anyway, that's the kind of week it's been. Next week? I'm on my own and will surely come crawling back to InternetLand for amusement because I will have no one to talk to except a squalling infant. And while he's UNBELIEVABLY BRILLIANT (he stares at high-contrast black-and-white images! he can sort of smile! he craps his pants with great aplomb!), he's not so much of a conversationalist yet.

Sure is cute though.

Can't you see how tired I am? And yet the iced tea, she is decaf. Also, the pets are circling with plans to do away with the child in the high-waisted pants.


When he gets really good and mad, his face kind of blends in with the wall color.

Oh man. That face. You can almost go blind from the adorableness.


My eyes!



OMG! I'm first - I think!

Take care of yourself and rest and relax and watch lots of bad tv movies on the Lifetime Channel.


Yeah, I've always been amazed by how a perfectly capable pregnant woman gets doors opened for her, yet a woman struggling with a stroller and bags and such gets the Annoyed Sigh of Exasperation. Noah's a keeper. It was awfully swell of you to plan your living room decor around his angst.


You are so right - the cuteness IS almost blinding! He is ADORABLE, thanks for the extra Noah pics!


awwwwwwwwwww. too adorable. you're seriously going to run out of words describing this one.


He is getting cuter by the day! We miss your daily updates but undertsand that Noah and relaxing (oh wait- and being waited on hand and foot) are more important then us! You look great!

Laura B

His cuteness just killed me. Am dead.



You can totally see what he's going to look like when he grows up.

And Noah? Is going to be a total lady killer. He's going to suck that sweet little bottom lip in and look at a girl with the puppy dog eyes, and she will melt through the cracks in the floor.

I hope you're ready for rabid teenage girls beating down your door.

For now though, you get to be blinded with his absolute adorableness. Thanks for sharing!


I can almost smell his adorable, sweet baby skin smell from here. Damn, girl. He is one cute boy!
The doors will be held open for you now but only by other mommies who have been in your shoes at one time.
Take advantage of those naps!! AND ask your mom to make you a grilled cheese and tomato sandwich, salt and vinegar potato chips and a root beer -- unless of course ANY of that will upset Mr. Noah's tummy. :-)

Heather B.

For Christmas? I'm asking for a Noah. Or like 10 Noahs.
Of course I say this now, but then when it comes time to take care of him, I'll be all like, "umm no" and not do nearly as good of a job as you seem to be doing.


Two words for you about Noah - BEYOND CUTE!!! I can only hope that my baby (5 weeks and counting) will be 1/2 as cute! And you look so good... Thanks for the pictures and the update :)


I expect that most of the female population of the internet is screaming at their boyfriends/husbands, "I WANT A CHILD, DON'T YOU GET IT??"

Look what you've gone and done.


Thank you for new pictures of all of the babies. Yes, Noah cuteness is lethal, but I am also pleased to see that Ceiba is up and around. She has become my second favorite Internet pet (have you seen Winston at fourfour???).


Ok, Noah is simple adorable (of course), but I love that wall color! Is that a suede finish paint trick you used to make it look all soft and fuzzy?


Don't hate me...but when I saw the comment about the adorable face, I immediately thought of how deeply happy and content your mom's expression is, and thought, "wow, she loves holding that baby, huh?" Then I realized you were talking about the boy. Who also looks deeply happy and content. AND SO ADORABLE THAT I AM NOW BLIND!

Sensitive Soul

You, after recently giving birth? Look wonderful. Seriously.


If you really want excitement, you should come to my post office. There are homeless people who loiter inside and pester the customers. Not to mention the incompetent staff who take no less than 40 minutes to find your registered mail packages.
PS Noah - Cute You on the couch with both pets and Noah - Adorable


OMG, more pictures. I love the baby pictures. He's just too cute. Actually no. I don't think a baby can BE too cute. Take it easy while your mom is there to help out. Don't worry about us, we'll be fine (actually no we won't but I feel it necessary to tell you that anyway). (((hugs))) to you and Noah!


You're right. I'm officially blind from the cuteness.


i love how you even put on a necklace and jeans. i mean cuz hello if i had just shot a 9lbs line backer out of my vagina i so would be wearing faded mismatched pjs with holes in them.


If you had 10 Noahs, that would be, like, 100 pounds of baby!!!

He is so gorgeous.


I did not think he could possibly get any more adorable than that first week we saw him. I was 100% WRONG!!! :)


You little dude is adorable. That cute little face is just precious.

BTW, just stumbled onto your site and love it.


You guys look great.


You guys look great.

Real Girl

Aww, I especially like the pic of you and all your snuffly, snuggly babies.

Is it okay that I'm a wee mite freaked out that there's a DC singles site called "" Is it for a particular brand of singles? I could easily click on your ad bar and find out, but I am scurred.


The other day, while dealing with a nasty bout of water retention, I briefly thought that my swollen belly might mean I was pregnant and that I too might get a Noah. I was all for the idea after seeing your pictures, but alas, just bloated.


Get some sleep!
When I saw the first picture of you and Noah, I thought you'd cut your hair (because of the illusion of it being shorter) and thought it was really cute. But then I saw the next picture with your long hair in a ponytail and thought, 'duh, it was just behind her shoulders.'

Your mom looks so happy to be a grandma! :)


There is nothing better than a sleeping baby! He is so peaceful and he doesn't have a care in the world. I envy sleeping babies!
You? Look fabulous!


Hey there mama! What a little cutie! And? He even attracts drunks. A talent most children don't aquire until 3 or so.
Good luck with that 'by-yourselfness' next week. We'll expect a fab update every day!


How incredibly adorable! You look great too, so soon after birth. The first month I wouldn't even allow photos of me, I looked like a walking zombie!

Enjoy the rest while you have help!


It's official. I want another baby. My husband will be looking for you to... thank you. Ya that's it.

Noah is just SO sweet and adorable. Not like you needed to be told. Enjoy every second :)


My phantom uterus, it pangs. PANGS, I tell you!

You both look wonderful. He really knows how to pull off the Fred Merman pants.


that Noah sure is a squish-pie.

this may be construed as assvice, but if the extreme fatigue continues, despite a fair amoutn of rest, consider having your doctor check you for postpartum thyroiditis. Very common, often blown off as PPD, and pure hell.

take care, you've got a real cutie there, high waisted pants and all.



I'm totally blinded by the cutness of your kid, like "not-even-sure-I'm-hitting-the-correct-keys" blind!!!

Lisa B

How can a person NOT be in love with that sweet little face?

I remember being that tired. It gets better for most after a few months.... Good luck.


Wow, he's starting to look like a real little person! There's nothing like a sleeping baby.

Sleep lots and we'll all be here when you get around to posting more.


I drive a bus for a living and see people who will not give up a seat for a pregnant woman or mother with tots quite often. Luckily I can require people to vacate the front seats and do so with great pleasure when needed.

P.S. Ceiba got her cast off?

P.P.S. Great arm tone by the way. I hate you.


Oh. My. God. The brood! It's overwhelming! I really do not need to be broody right now, I'm but a child (well, I'm 22...but mentally...I'm totally 14!)

You look great for someone who had a baby less than a month ago, when my brood finally bears fruit (way in the future) I will look back, from the top of the meat scale they will no doubt have to weigh me on, and curse you. CURSE!

But for now...I'll just awww.

For Joke!

I can't see a thing.



Speechless at cuteness.

Amy also

You aren't kidding about the adorableness - Noah is perfection.


Blind. I'm suing you for posting such cuteness and blinding me.





I've got a fever, and the only prescription is more cowbell. . .and also more pictures of Noah.


Dude, you have a newborn. I hear these things take up quite a bit of time, so, you know, don't feel bad about the not posting. Sleep when you can!


What happened to his other, like, 5 chins?? He's all wobbledy-neck lean and scrumptious!


"if you had 10 Noahs, that would be, like, 100 pounds of baby!!!"

--if you had 10 Noahs, you still wouldn't be the Duggars. Imagine that!

He, you and your mom could not be cuter. You and your mom are just amazing!

Dude! Sleep! No guilt.


Noah, in the second to last picture, looks just like Jason. My lawd!

The cuteness! Am going blind...vsmy yu[r smu,ptr/


Sleep is good.

You guys are too cute.


I don't know who is more blissed out - Noah or your mother. Too cute for words. And that photo with the critters? Hilarious. The cat looks totally pissed. Heh.


I think it's all been said already, but I have to repeat. Noah is just too cute. And your mom looks absolutely thrilled in every picture. And you look pretty great yourself despite being very tired.


so, i have to agree with the rest, your baby is mad cute, beyond the cuteness of most babies (who usually are not so attractive when they're super-little). wow.

about the stroller: i know you have to have it, and that you are probably really thoughtful about how you handle it. But a lot of us single people are scarred by other people we have encountered, wielding stroller, who have rammed us in the shins or prevented us from exiting subway cars or, worse yet, bought the giant SUV Bugaboo baby strollers and block off the whole sidewalk when they propel them down the street, baby-tank like. Forcing us in the way of cars. So we have a reflexive instinct of self-shin-defense and annoyance at moms who don't want to share the sidewalk, they want to take it over! this being to say that i am glad there are moms like you realize these things and who will counteract this image.

oy vey, i am afraid i will be bashed by your following. but i've helped many a mom, asked and unasked, carry their baby stroller down flights of metro stairs! i like moms! it's not black and white! it's just, there's often a (reasonable) history to the stroller-annoyance thing. and since it's taboo to mention it, i especially wanted to.

okay, back to your regular programming!


What is this? Your toenails are polished. Your powers never cease to amaze. :)

And yes, he's absolutely adorable.

And yes, the old man that wouldn't leave totally sounded drunk to me.

Ba ha ha ha


Baby Noah, still so darn cute.

Are you telling me that because I am pregnant random strangers are going to open doors for me? Will they also buy me ice cream? Because ice cream is what I really want.


awww I am melted by the cuteness! Has anyone mentioned the Mayawrap thingy yet? if not you might want to go look into them, I loved them when Hunter was younger, and it worked so much better in stores and places and ..yeah I really reccomend them.

However I am not a anti stroller nazi I do have and use a huge SUV stroller that I love to death and back. I just love the maya wrap too


awww, such a sweet baby face. I agree with Kathleen, he'll have a girlfriend by preschool!

You look great, I love your jeans.


Your little man is absolutely gorgeous. And it will blow your mind in three, four, five months and so on how completely gorgeous he still looks, but how completely different from what he used to look like. I look back at pictures of my son when he was a newborn and it just amazes me.


You all look blissful...really and Noah, what a sweetheart! SO adorable. I have to say that when I look at the photos of Jason, especially from the eyes up - Noah is exactly like him - the wider set eyes, whereas, YOUR NOSE is all over Noah! A perfect blend of the both of you in that one sweety!!! How's Jason doing with everything now? Happy to see your mom wrapped up with baby, too!

Dr. Johnny Fever

I want to hug him.

S. Faolan Wolf

Noah and your mom look so happy and content. Those photos are just relaxing.

And there's Cieba!! Yay! That dog rules. I don't see a cast..did she get it off or is it just hidden?

S. Faolan Wolf

Oh, one more thing:

Pic 2 is the kind that makes me go, "Oh hell no I'm not having a kid!"

Pic 4 is the kind that makes me go, "Hmm. Maybe I'm so very, very wrong to think like that."


He's an angel, just perfect and beautiful!


LOVE the pics of Noah. He is the only child I've seen recently who I think is maybe, possibly, almost as cute as my son. ;-) Look out, ladies!

(this is a HUGE compliment, please take it as such!)


Apparently being pregnant has sucked all available brain cells out of my head, because I forgot what I was going to say. Damn!


Oh! I remember! It was about the pants pulled up to baby's nipples! My husband constantly made fun of our son, saying I dressed him like an old man! I think it's adorable!

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