Holy crap. I've elecrocuted myself before. I blame it for all sorts of current weird behaviors, though I'm quite sure that particular instance had or has anything to do with them.

Le sigh.

Good luck finding that step stool.

I think I see it behind the folding table.

I am so showing my husband your blog today. Because he totally thought I was the only one in the world that kept fancy shopping bags (but it's from the FRENCH QUARTER! I don't care if it's a plastic bag!).

~Carrie

Baby things are sacred... folding tables? Not so much.

Let me just say Moving totally sucks!

i'm with you on the gift boxes and bags, man. 37 gift boxes? why, that's a trifle!

[in voice of Roy Scheider:] i think you're gonna need a bigger house.

Bwah ha ha ha ha! I never give in to Dave and he never gives in to me. However I win because eventually he always puts the stuff I want to keep in the attic, and I deliver the stuff he wants to keep to Goodwill while he's away at poker night. So far, so good. He's only ever reported one thing missing, and it was a shirt that I eventually convinced him he had one time painted in and ruined. The truth is that it is in perfectly good condition at Goodwill. Perfectly good condition except for the condition of UGLY, that is.

But why is Mount Rainier on notice? What did it ever do to you?

OMG. YOU COULD HAVE DIED. YOU GOT ELECTIFRIED!!!

Ah, purging is always fun.

It's also fun watching the stuff you put on the curb disappear within minutes. People are vultures, you should set up a sting to see the crap people take because it's free.

Ahh, moving is SUCH fun.

Mt. Rainier is apparently acting in semi-suspicious-volcanic ways, with earthquakes and shit. ON NOTICE.

As for painting the blue kitchen? Well, with a purple front door, an orange living room and a flipping oak tree in the baby's room our realtor suggested that maybe, JUST MAYBE we should paint the kitchen a nice, non-seizure-inducing white.

I recently had to clean out the nursery closet (read holding cell for crap we never use and haven't seen since we moved in). Thank goodness I had the foresight to do it when my husband was at work! Any advice on what the hell to do with my wedding dress?

You should call Tivo about the broken box. Ours broke recently (devastating; it was the morning before the Grey's Anatomy season premiere). I happened to call to ask about how the rebate worked when you bought a new Tivo, and they offered me a completely free Tivo, with free shipping even, despite the fact that I had no warranty, just because they are really nice. I love tivo so much that I took them up on that offer, and went out and immediately bought a replacement dual tuner tivo also (which was only $80 after all the rebates). Now, we have tivo everywhere. You too could have free tivo.

Nary a mention of the tire?

Sounds like we all had moments of domestic bliss this weekend.

I got electrocuted from an electric pencil sharpener. And I wasn't even shoving metal things in either, just the dam pencil.

Have I mentioned IT WAS IN MY CLASSROOM? And the KIDS are supposed to sharpen their pencils? Hell no.

The conversation about the table is one I know all too well. My boyfriend's entire family are huge packrats. I once witnessed a fight over a cat dish they got at a garage sale years ago. His mom asked one sister if she wanted it, then the other sister said no, SHE wanted it, then it got offered to us, I declined, and the original sister got it.

I am the only one who actually has a cat. And the bowl was ass-ugly.

That photo of you is super cute and very funny! Post more pictures of yourself, Amy! :)

OMG! It is such a man thing (I think) to keep such stupid stuff. My husband seriously has keep every magazine he has EVER bought. Like he may someday "read" that 1975 National Geographic. Seriously! I have hidden stuff in the trash to go out and he knows! He has some kind of radar and will dig through the trash!! Drives me crazy. So good luck with that, and I will just bet you that when you move you will find a lovely folding table!! Ha!

There are too many hilarious things here. I don't even know where to begin. So instead.....

Ahhhh, pretty blue walls.

When we moved, I was forced, FORCED I tell you to not only throw out the giant fancy shopping bag stuffed with carefully folded smaller fancy shopping bags, but also to throw out ALL the pretty baby shower gift bags I had received. The gift bags! That contained the first gifts I was ever given for my preshus first baby! And I had to throw them out! Okay, so there were a LOT of them, but still.

Ugh...we're contemplating the moving business...and this makes it seem even LESS appealing. :P Glad you survived the electrocution. :)

Dear self,

Please read the comments on Amalah before you post yours, because chances are she's already answered the question you asked.

Sincerely,
Me

Mount Ranier? I take personal offense to that, seeing as I live so close to it. It being a freaking active volcano. And oh yeah, you have that thing about volcanoes.

How about this one?

I'm selling my house and most of the CRAP I have to get rid of is broken stuff left behind by my ex-husband. Also included in the CRAP are two tall file cabinets full of his collection of manuals for synths and keyboards.

Also credited to him is the complete lack of yard (but not land), random shelving installed in a closet which will now only around 3000 CD's, and the faucets in the bathroom (yes, sink AND tub) turning a complete 360 degrees after he fixed them. Hell yeah, he fixed 'em good.

HOLY SHIT!!!! I actually sat here and read this post to my husband. And we died. We died laughing. I totally owe you something. Like a folding table or a step stool.

And I almost forgot - I live in the best neighborhood for getting rid of your crap on the front lawn. Quickest to go: a set of kitchen chairs and a lamp from K-Mart. Longest to stay: a stand alone freezer that I labeled "FREE-zer."

The only way anyone's getting my gift bag and box collection is by prying it out of my cold, dead fingers. It constantly evolves! It grows like Amish Friendship Bread! Give one away/get three in return.

Don't sweat the volcanoes. I don't, and I live right across the river from Mt. St. Helen's. My mother-in-law e-mailed me from Europe a couple years ago: "Is the mountain erupting?" I e-ed back: "Huh?" They were worrying about it abroad. Those Europeans are so sweet that way.

I followed a strict rule last time I moved: If I hadn't used it in a year, it wasn't kept. I wonder what I would have done if there were things I didn't even know I had (like a folding table). I probably would have brought it with me and considered it a sign. From whom, I don't know.

So did the Blue's Clues stuff and shopping bags actually end up in the trash??? I'm guessing from the wording of your two lists that you got to keep what you wanted. As it should be.

Now we have a support group for hoarders of fancy shopping bags too! It is fitting somehow that the demographic should overlap with the toe-shaving support group.

OMG, I am so happy to see that someone else's husband is a box freak! Why, why, why?!?! My husband insists on saving every friggin box that anything we purchase comes in "just in case" we have to return it. Our porch literally teeters with empty boxes poised at the ready for the return of any faulty merchandise we may have purchased over the last year. Thank God the town we live in has an annual put out day where we can haul whatever and however much crap we have out to the curb and they will take it away. Every year there is a MOUNTAIN of cardboard at the curb in front of our house...only to begin the year a new. This year's put out day is NEXT MONDAY...which should give you a idea of just how dangerous our porch is at this moment.

It is a comfort to know that I am not alone...

I love this post. Mainly because it totally reminds me of ME! I'm the letsjustthrowthisshitoutwedontneeditanymore kinda person and my husband is the weshouldn'tthrowitawaywemightneeditsometime kinda guy. So yeah, I totally understand. Wanna borrow a stepstool? I have a couple in the garage that we don't use anymore!

oh i loves me some fancy shopping bags too!

no way would i ever just throw them away.

and why didn't your mother-in-law just ask for the table?

you guys are awesome... *grin*

Dude. That folding table thing? That would be my family. My Mom wants to keep *everything*. Last time they moved my Dad gave up trying to thow things away and started packing everything up and labling the boxes creative things like "dried up paints only a mother could love", and "More stuff we don't need". Heh.

Brilliant!

A story: My boyfriend, with whom I live (being a grammar nazi makes for some strange sentence construction in a casual setting), and I are both packrats. We have a very small apartment. Sometimes, we really do TRY to weed things out. A recent conversation:

Him: (holds up a free lanyard from a baseball game) "Do we need this? I think I'll throw it away."
Me: "Uh...maybe...but...I guess we don't really need it."
Him: "...I think I'll keep it. We might need it sometime."

Moving stinks! Good luck w/ it all.

Becca, you can donate your gown to http://www.makingmemories.org/brides_against_breast_cancer.html Your dress will be resold & all proceeds go towards "making wishes and dreams come true for women and men diagnosed with terminal breast cancer." I found this site recently. I don't know anyone who has donated or purchased through this program, but it looks like it is worth the research if you are committed to getting rid of your gown. Good luck!

I am so impressed you changed anything electrical! I always freak the crap out of myself when the hubby goes anywhere near electrical stuff, so I sure won't be going anywhere near it. And what is it w/ the curb stuff? I love how it all magically disappears. Poof!!

Ah yes, the pain of selling a house. I do NOT envy you. Wait til you actually have to move.
It sucks donkey balls and I've never had to do it with a baby. I'm not looking forward to it this time.

Uh-oh - white paint over dark-ish blue? Been there. Trust me - hire a painter! I don't mind painting, but after the third coat on the same wall it gets kinda old.

My house has been on the market for 9 days. You know what sucks? Making the bed, picking up stray stuff, and cleaning up the kitchen every.single.day. Gah!

HOw long did it take for the feeling to come back to your hand? It takes a while, doesn't it? Jason sounds like my Hubby; he almost cried when I threw out a bunch of empty computer game boxes stored in yet another empty box. Seriously, why???

Oh, yeah, forgot about the shopping bags. I have loads & use them constantly - nothing like an old Coach bag instead of brownbagging lunch; I use jcrew bags for my shoes (which always travel in their boxes) for weekends at the folks. They're also great for moving (if you're do-it-yourselfers) - I packed all my shoe boxes/shoes in them last time. Which is incidently, the time my hubbie said, for sure we won't be moving for like, 5yrs so you don't need to keep boxes. Guess what, its been 2yrs, we're moving in June (Lord willing) and will need every single one of those boxes. Vindication is mine! ;)

So, yeah, I have a confession to make...I'm a maybeIshouldkeepthisbecauseitmightcomebackintostyleorImightneedit gal...but I'm going through the 12 step program mandated by my throwtheshitoutyouhaven'twornitsincehighschoolandreallyhowmuchtupperwaredoyouneed boyfriend before I move across the country to live with him. I have to admit, dropping off an old computer, two fishbowls, ten bags of clothes, and assorted appliances has been liberating...I can actually see the light at end of the tunnel I've made in the Tupperware cabinet.

By the way, want a step stool? I've got one I need to get rid of...

And what happened to the damn TIRE? You're keeping us in some serious suspense here...

LOL - This so reminds me of my hubby. I'm a not-so-sentimental kind of gal: I come from a long line of pack rats and the habit to hoard WILL stop with me! My hubby will find things in the trash, dig them out and bring the fact that they shouldn't be there to my attention. 'Send it to goodwill, Jen.' For cripes sake, I married a martyr.

I, too, almost electrocuted meself. Sparks flew. It was kewl.

Your site is so fabulous, dahling.

Wow. I thought that I had moved on from our moving adventure of a month ago but, no. You just brought it all rushing back.

My husband? Refused to throw anything out. I went through the entire house, leaving him only the basement--full of his sundry items--as his responsibility. I had to go out of town and he kept saying, "I'll take care of it before you get back."

He moved ALL OF IT. Every box of trash, every crate of every stupid thing he's ever collected, every beaten up piece of furniture that he swears he will restore. He didn't toss any of it. It is now sitting in our NEW basement. And we still don't know what's down there, but he's convinced that he can't live without it.

Pack rats of the world, I ask you: what is the bleeping point?

Oh, the folding table wasn't one of those nice little card tables. No, this was a BIG ASS FOLDING TABLE, like the kind your church used to use for potluck dinners.

And...tire? What tire? What's all this crazy talk about a tire? Have you all confused me with some other white-trashy redneck blogger or something?

Jason took the tire to the storage unit, where it is bound to come in super handy when he gets a flat tire like, tomorrow.

My husband has a huge plastic bin full of cords and wires from old computers, electronics etc. It started 7 years ago in WA, followed us to Chicago and now to HI. It has grown substantially of course as new cords and wires replace the old. Into the bin the old ones go. I can think of exactly 0 instances where one has been used, but heaven forbid we throw any away because you never know...(Also it would be impossible to find something if you actually did need one because there are so many stuffed in there.)

And he gives me a hard time about my old clothes. I will fit into them again, someday.

I electrocuted myself once. I was reaching underneath the entertainment center to unplug something and I stuck my finger in between the prongs and got a pretty good jolt. My hair didn't stick up, but my heart was beating funny for a few minutes.

I throw some of my husband's stuff away when he's not home.

I save the baby things. I like to freak my husband out by saying I'm keeping them "just in case." His usual reply is, "I hope you and your next husband are very happy."

Holy shit comments woman!

I just wanted to say that i lurve you ( that's what jenB says to me.)

I'm all better now.

Ha ha ha ha! The tire is in the storage unit. No pictures?