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Suburban Sprawl

Ikea Jones and the Big Boy Bed of Doom

Dun dun duuuuuun!


God, but we're nuts.

Noah has been rather ornery about his crib lately -- preferring to sleep all spread-eagle on our bed, to the point of requesting "big bed nite-nite." (Hey kids! Nobody tells you this, but I will: Go and get yourself all officially speech-delayed and I promise you, your parents will JUMP to obey every request you deign to put into words. Fish, barrel, kabloom.) He didn't really care if we were there with him or not, so we wondered if maybe -- just maybe -- our 95th-percentile-for-height boy was feeling a mite cramped in his crib.

So Jason posed the question this weekend: "Noah, would you like your OWN big bed? In your OWN room?"

Noah thought about it for a second: "Yep!"

I was less convinced (last week I asked him if he wanted a knuckle sandwich and he replied, "YEP! WIT JAM!"), but then I remembered that holiday ornaments are currently 75% off at IKEA, and also they look like glass but are actually plastic -- a good call since Noah's obsession with all things ABALL continues unabated.  And the front hall closet really needs a Solution of some kind.

So we went to IKEA. We bought a big boy bed. It has a tent. I wish MY bed had a tent. Like, I am really very annoyed that my bed does not have a tent.

After we disassembled the crib, moved and reassembled the crib in the spare room (which now, with the crib and a wardrobe full of receiving blankets, looks an awful lot like a baby's room, which is GREAT, I AM BEING MOCKED BY A ROOM), assembled the big boy bed and had bitten our potty-mouth tongues down to nubs, we brought Noah in for the unveiling.

He thought about it for a second: "Nope."

It took a few trips -- five, actually -- back upstairs to escort him back to bed, but eventually he figured it out and fell asleep. He slept all night, woke up around 8 and amused himself quietly with his books until Jason went to get him. A raging success, I'd say.

Except...for right now, which is naptime. I don't know what he's doing up there, but I know he is definitely not sleeping. But I've decided I'm okay with that, so long as he continues to not know how to operate a doorknob. Behold, my foolproof plan!


(He was smiling and laughing right up until he realized I had the camera. Then he was all, "WOE FOR POSTERITY. BEHOLD THE TORTURE.")




I would love a tent over my bed too. Might block out a little light since our blinds and black-out curtains still let in way too much. Very cool. Hope he starts to like it more, and takes plenty of time to learn the whole doorknob thing.


What a fun and dreamy bed! I'm sure he'll love his big boy bed soon enough because what boy doesn't love a tent?


Congrats on the bed! He's such a big boy!
When Sam first went from a crib to his own bed (a race car!) we decided to let him nap in our bed instead of his. It's worked for us so far. I guess we figured that since naps were always such a fight anyways, he'd realize that he could get out of bed and play and we didn't want that knowledge to tranfer over to night time, where he was always such a good sleeper.
Have a good day!


How could he not be tired after all the revelry that was this morning?

Hmm, maybe all the sugar.

Michael went right to sleep, in like 2.2 seconds.


Cute as always. Good luck getting him to stay in it!


Yay, you have moved to the big boy bed mode! Can I say DUDE, we finally have Ikea again.

After having Potomac Mills, College Park and White Marsh within 90 minutes or less, it is great. We saw Noah's bed, but found out that in the three years since we last were in an Ikea, they discontinued our color of Billy Bookcases.

We consoled ourselves with marketplace purchases and swedish meatballs.

I totally wouldn't nap if I had a tent on my bed, either!


Yeah, I want a tent too. Except that as my bed is mighty high on risers (the better to hide tons of crap with), the tent would scrape the ceiling.

You realize this means when he's a touch older, you're going to have to whip out the super dooper bunk bed with tent AND slide, right?


Bed tents are AWESOME. My brother and I each had one when we were little (although they were separate from the bed, not included like the IKEA bed/tent) and I would totally kill to have one again.


Hi Amy,
I've been reading a long time, (2 whole years) but've been to shy to write.
I'm from Santiago de Chile (Southamerica)and i'm the mother of two tremendously fabulous boys (2 1/2 and 1 y.old)
You have no idea how I envy you, YOU HAVE IKEA! Wish we did...


I thought I was being all clever when I got one of those cribs that converts to a toddler bed..."look honey, we won't even have to go out and get a separate toddler bed!"

WHAT WAS I THINKING?? Who doesn't want to go out shopping amongst all of the adorable toddler beds when the time comes?? AND THE TENT ONE? IS SO AWESOME.


My son's girlfriend left this enormous Dora tent at my house, and my boy has insisted it stay over his bed at all times. It takes up his whole freaking room, but it's wicked cool.

Type (little) a

Back in May we took the 4th "wall" off the crib.

And on Saturday we moved our 3.5 yo daughter to a twin bed. I guess that is a BIG big girl bed.

Damn kid slept like the dead the last two nights. Maybe all 43" of her was a little cramped in the crib mattress?

Amy :)

When Noah does finally figure out the doorknobs, run (don't walk!) and get some of these:

I know they're supposedly for the safety of the kid, but they also work wonders for the sanity of the mom.

kim at allconsuming

1. I am so with you on the tent caper. But remember this initial joy when it comes to having to change sheets and the effing tent is as annoying as all hell.

2. At least the mocking from the room is more quiet than the mocking from your ovaries that is torturing your maternal/parenting instinct. As any good sibling is want to do.

3. We too are in the grip of moving to a big boy bed (Jasper is two weeks younger than Noah). We're in round 2 as round 1 ended quite spectacularly with the cat jumping on the bed in the middle of the night and scaring J into a shaky, sweaty mass of fear and hatred of all things the big bed could offer. Mind you, a Thomas the Effing Engine doona cover and Bob the Builder pillow case seem to have made round 2 more of a success, even if having mis-matched bedding with prints that fight and warring trademarks at the fore is making my eyes bleed.

Amy :)

Aargh for long urls.

Mandy B

Is that a toddler bed? Isn't it the same size as a crib? It's very cute and the tent totally rocks. But, if he was feeling cramped in the crib, won't he be cramped in a toddler bed?


Yup, my daughter sleeps great through the night in her 'big girl' bed, but when it comes time for a nap, she's all over the place in there. Most of the time she'll end up falling asleep on the floor behind the door (we have a baffle on the doorknob on her side so she can't open it herself--because if she could she would!!).


That first picture, up at the top...sooo funny. It's taking everything I have not to give it a "lol tag".


But...what about the Solution?

Suzy Q

Am jelus of kewl tent bed.


Screw the tent -- I just love the BEDDDING. How rockin' is that?


Mandy - the new bed IS actually a good deal longer than his crib (although it's hard to tell from the photo). And he's got more room to spread his arms out.

His crib converts to a full-size twin bed but Jason would have NONE OF THAT re: falling out of bed, breaking necks, etc. And like Danell said, shopping for toddler beds! Fun! Whee!

Assertagirl - like so many things in my life, there was no Solution for my particular Problem.

Miss W

Cute :) We thought the big boy bed trick would work. And yet the boy child still refuses to sleep anywhere but our bed and will not nap at all unless it's curled up in MY arms.


I remember when our son got his big boy bed. He was so upset when we put it in his room. For some reason he thought it would be in our room. He had somehow thought that our bedroom was for 'real beds' and his was for 'little beds'. Oh the disappointment when he realized he wasn't moving into our bedroom!


Woe be unto you parents who move your child from Baby Jail to Toddler Bed, for it marks the end of the glorious time of keeping thine toddler confined and knowing wherefore he is at all times. Welcome now unto the times of finding thine offspring with books, toys, and all manner of clothing from his dresser around his person two hours after bedtime.

Michele Rowe

Tent bed is tres cool!


When I was a kid, my sister and I had tents for our beds. It was every bit as awesome as you would think it would be.


When we were little my sister and I also had tents on our beds, My little Pony. I am thinking my 4 year needs a bed tent now too. I though I was done Christmas shopping.

Lisa M

AWwww! Now I want a tent bed! He'll adjust and be such a big boy sleeping in his own bed! My first kid slept with us for almost 2 years. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Their own beds are so much nicer for everyone.

All Adither

You're nice parents. My daughter is not escaping her crib until she's 3.5. Despite the fact that she's amazonianly tall.


I have never understood these little bitty "big kid" beds. I mean, they are super cute, but you see when I was young I knew better. The point of a big kid bed was to be able to sprawl out and get comfortable oh say... 587 different ways. On a bed that size there are only about 2 ways I can think of.

And that's why my parents had to go straight to the twin bed because let's face it, a kid has got to have room to sprawl!


Sorry, is there a bed there?

Because I'm too busy looking at the floors...

...which look fanTAStic!!!



I can totally relate....we just put our daughter (2yrs in November)into her own big girl bed. This was necessary due to the fact that she tried to break her neck climbing out of her crib a week ago. I was rather surprised that she actually slept in her bed all night long (although when we went in to check on her she had about 15 Dora the Explorer books stacked up underneath her...). Nap time? is another story. In fact, right now when she is supposed to be taking a nap, she is knocking on her bedroom door saying, "Mommy,...Mommy,...where are you?". Glad we aren't the only ones with big bed nap woes...


Ahhhh, the joys of moving out of cribs and into beds. Lol. Naptime can be recovered, but it takes time for them to learn to sleep in the different bed during the day. We had to go through that transition with twins both times, and it was a scream. Little boys can find a lot to giggle and shriek about at naptime when they move into 'big boy beds'.


I'm just getting caught up.

First of all? Noah is the cutest 2 year old on the Internet.


I totally want a tent for my bed ;)


I hear you on that speech-delay thing. When our son started to ask for cookies and such in full sentences, he got as many as he asked for.

Big Mama

Well, really, would anyone leave their bed if it had a tent?


must agree on the bedding comment--totally rockin!


Those sheets are groovy.


I also know about the mocking room. We have the crib and changing table on one side of our bedroom, intended for the baby I should have had in October or March. Furniture's still there, but there's no baby and I'm not pregnant (anymore).


Hey! You CAN have a tent on your bed. It's called a four-poster with curtains (canopy). I love it. But my husband has me figured out: "You don't want a bed. You want a fort."


Oh! Your baby's growing up! Isn't it sad and exciting at the same time?

My parents have a Giraffe tent (from Tarjay) for my son to sleep under when we go there. He thinks it's awesome and I'm not up all night with a 3 year old sharing the teeny tiny bed with us. Win/Win!

yet another from the legions of Amys

I have a canopy and curtains around my four-poster bed and it is AWESOME.


LOVE IKEA!!! Our whole house is IKEA decorated. The tent bed is especially cool. They really should sell one in adult size.


Oh.... and when Noah figures out the whole doorknob concept just add on one of those lovely doorknob covers. Zoe's got the whole doorknob thing downpat. The only thing that keeps her away from the cookies in the pantry closet is a doorknob cover.


Cordy took some time to get used to her big girl bed. She loves it now, although we still find her asleep on the floor at times.

And if he figures out the doorknob, you'll need one of those doorknob covers. And when he figures out the cover (mine is just 3 and figured it out), you go back to baby gates in front of the door. Everything goes in circles, I guess.


Adorable kid! Love the "no match for my dad" shirt too! Where can I get one?


omg, look at the big boy in his big boy room! What a cool tent, I'm jealous.


I'm a lurker, and yet, have been drawn out my silence to ask: does it not drive you nuts to have the same colors next to each other with the ABC floor mats?

Because honestly, that's the first thing I saw in the top picture. GOD HELP ME.

Also, your child is making my ovaries hurt.


1. My kids liked the "big bed" too - even after they got their own (sans tents). In fact they still want to sleep in the "big bed" sometimes and they are teenagers!

2. Tents are over rated according to my neice who had to spend several days in her daughter's Dora tent bed after giving up her bed for out of town guests. She was glad to get back to her own untented bed.

3. What a milestone - out of the crib, into a real bed. Congratuations Noah!


What a coincidence! My boy needs a 'Big Boy Bed,'too! But he's 15.5 and 6' 1", and it's the twin size that's killing him. He'd probably like a tent though, and the awesome bedding!


Heh, that face says it all.

Ikea has the best kids beds ever. Never mind a bed with a tent, I just want to live at Ikea. They serve food. I think I could make it work.


See how he feels about sharing his tented bed? 'Cause I'm all for it or he can sit outside and I can hang out inside. In a freaking tent.

And I won't go into how incredibly old I suddenly feel with your child and the talking and the sleeping in a real bed.


What a big milestone. The first of many. Happy sleeping!
That picture is too cute.


psh, is it wrong to be so jealous of Noah and his fancy tent bed? If it's wrong than I don't want to be right!


I had a tent in junior high -- loved it! It was a "full on" tent too, as in the tent completely covered the bed. I hardly ever came out. (Okay, for food, TV and to pee but that's seriously about it.)

I wonder if they still make those things...hmm...


I so deserve a tent on bed.

I love Noah's t-shirt.

kim at allconsuming

I'm also presuming that presshuusss has not realised he can seperate the letters from the surrounds of that rubber alphabet mat you've got going on there.

Because when mine realised they could be pulled apart, I think it lasted a total of about 45 minutes in our house before I collected it all up in a rubbish bag and put it out on the gutter.

No wonder one of them can't talk and the other one is slow to read.


Noah looks exactly like Jason in the second picture. Except for the hair.


Awwww. Big boy bed. And I love the tent. Did you get out of Ikea relatively unscathed this time?

Suddenly I have a very strong urge to visit their website. Uh oh.

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