Monkey On My Back (oh, don't worry, I've still got a zillion monkey-puns left)
Mah Bucket of Solitude

Re: I Lost 10 Pounds in 24 Hours!! Ask Me How!!!1!

Within an hour of publishing Tuesday's post, I very suddenly came down with that stomach bug Noah had last week. (NO I AM NOT PREGNANT.) (Come on, you know I managed to pee on a stick in the middle of all the nausea, right?) (Also, what a weird phrase "came down with" is. Like instead of saying what really happened, which is that I very suddenly puked my guts out, I make it sound like I was a contestant on the Price is Right.)

Anyway. I am not sure if this has been established in my illustrious history of oversharing with the Internet, but I DO NOT DO SICK WELL. I am a magnificent baby about being sick. Just...spectacular. I immediately called Jason to inform him of the immediate need to get his ass home, and also got in a good 10 minutes of whining about my injuries and my knees and how my injuries and my knees where making the whole thing so much worse because have you ever tried to crouch around the toilet with broke-ass tore-up knees?

(Seriously, but my knees are killing me. The scrapes gave way to bruises in all colors of the rainbow that creep down my legs to my ankles, plus I managed a good sprain-ish twisting of the left one, and I never even showed you my palms and wrists, and in summary: TREMENDOUS WAH.)

Luckily, it was indeed a 24-hour bug of some kind, and after 25 hours of moaning and a love-hate relationship with sips of water ("well, I kept that last sip down okay and I'm just SO THRISTY, maybe I'm up for a real grown-up size swallow?" *gulp* "FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK.") -- the clouds parted and lo, there was an instant and insatiable desire for a grilled cheese sandwich. Maybe two.

And that was my day! How was yours? All this and more, I hope.


(Noah's bedside manner just may be the best ever, though. He combed my hair and helpfully suggested that some Blue's Clues might cheer me up. Such a giver, this one.)



That kind of lovin' would cure any ailment, I am sure. What a punkin.

Suzy Q

Glad you're feeling better. Is Noah going to be a doctor?


I can totally relate...and Mika's bedside manner is great too...maybe its the age?
LOL - feel better.


Oh GOD, the "please, please, a big swallow of water, please...*BLAAAARGH!!!" is the worst. Thank goodness you have such a good bedside pal.


I'm jealous! My 24 hour bug only lost me 6 pounds.

Seriously, is there anyone out there who hasn't gotten the flu this year? It's crazy!


He is so sweet, I am glad you are feeling to be sick.


Hope you're feeling 100% soon! Noah is just too cute- I love that he combed your hair- sweetest little boy ever!


feel better!


Glad you're feeling better.

I could really use some of Noah's TLC right now. I have been sick with a stomach virus plus flu since last Thursday.


It seems nearly everyone has either a stomach bug or upper-respiratory bug (and sometimes both!).
I hope your ailment is truly over soon and that it doesn't morph into anything else...
Luckily, you have a hair-combing cutie-pie to help you through it :)


Aren't little ones just the best when you're sick? My kids are like that.

The diva dog is another story. "Don't care if you're puking Must Have Treat NOOOOWWW."


I know it has been said before, but Noah=most beautiful child ever. Except for my own. So cute. Glad you're feeling better!


I can stand being sick.

I can't stand puking. I will do anything and everything to avoid puking.

Hope you're feeling better!


aww what a cute little guy and I agree, more blues clues always cures any sickness, that or it will numb your brain so you don't hurt so bad.


Aww man, glad you are feeling better. I lost 5 pounds in 24 hours to that same virus. Ugh.


Glad to hear you're feeling better. Noah is an angel, you know that.


Kids really do have the best bedside manner. A few weeks ago I was hungover, and Dylan made Michael bring me breakfast in bed.


Welllllllll...I was all up into the feeling sorry for you vibe until I saw the picture. Then I realized you aren't so bad off after all. God is that child adorable.


Oh yes, THAT flu. I got it Christmas eve and had it through Christmas Day. Best. Christmas. Ever! I think I only lost 7 pounds, though. And I've managed to keep off 3 of them!

Glad you're feeling better!


I'm glad Noah is taking such good care of his mom. But I'm sorry his mom was sick.


"maybe I'm up for a real grown-up size swallow? *gulp* "FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK"

Freakin' brilliant.


My daughter is also awesome when I am sick in bed. I frequently have migraines that slam me into bed all day, she just hangs out with me reads books, plays and watched tv while i nap and recuperate.


Blues Clues cheers me up, but that's probably because I have no kids and have never had to watch it against my will.


So glad you're feeling better! And also that I'm not the only one who craves grilled cheese sandwiches like mad after stomach bugs.

jive turkey

I was actually just marveling that you didn't come down with Noah's bug, and then...


I'm such a spaz about stomach viruses that immediately after reading this post, I caught myself wondering if I could catch your bug through teh internets.

It's not that I don't do sick well, it's that I don't do sick AT ALL.

I will probably catch a stomach virus, though, now, because of talking about it. The universe likes to say: you can, in fact, do sick, and what's more? YOU WILL.


Can you pass that 10lb weight loss bug over to me please?
Hope you are feeling better. And yes, Noah's suggestions of Blue's Clues will cure anything!!! Too sweet ;)


Yeah if I could have that 10 lb bug for about a month, I think I could get into my jeans.


Oh, didn't you get the memo? The one that came home with Noah from the hospital?

The one about how, in exchange for all the indescribable scrumptiousness of your baby, you'd be giving up the month of February for the next 8 years due to illness?

I'd fax you a copy of mine, but I used it as a Kleenex and then one of the kids threw up on it.


Hey, Blue's Clues makes everyone feel better... Smart kid.

Hope you feel better!


could you send some of that over here? maybe a double dose so i could lose 20 lbs?

god your son is so damn cute.


I think this year must be one for the record books...everyone has got the stomach flu at some point this winter...everyone with kids that is. I hear their immune systems get stronger at 3 so maybe they won't get it as much...but wait, I'm over 3 and I still got it. Must be a bad strain..hopefully this year is an anomaly. Glad you are feeling better!


Hope you get to feeling better. Noah combed your hair? That is the sweetest thing I've ever heard!


Grilled Cheese always does the trick for me! It's amazing what it does for a hangover... or an empty just finished puking guts out for 24-hours bug stomach..

Eh... you know what I mean.


I'm 57 so my illness is MUCH more remarkable. Seriously, chills & fever on Saturday, major WAH and yuck every day since then, dizzy, weak as a kitten, just feel like I'm someplace else. I babysit 2 grandchildren....where the hell could I have gotten this nasty bug?!


Okay, that does sound like I'm pregnant, doesn't it? But there is no star shining over my house so it couldn't be so, could it?....


I was thinking how much your knees must be stinging from the fall, and now read that you have been on them in front of the potty. OW. Glad you're feeling better now.

I had a twinge of jealousy when I read that your baby combed your hair for you. Such a sweet-heart. My boys always (when asked to brush my hair when they were little) sort of bounced the hair-brush off my skull and then had enough about 20 seconds into it. I had had enough after the first bounce. Sigh.


I'm so sorry you were so sick. Noah is such a sweetie to be so concerned-I'm sure Blue's Clues did make you feel better, right? :)


We totally had that bug in our house. Suckety crap suckola, then over, except for the few days of sore abs from all the hurling. Glad you are feeling better.


Noah is such a darling for sharing Blue's Clues with you. Hope you feel better!


Okay, I have read, "Pee on a stick," one too many times here, that I have to tell this story...because each time it reminds me of....a boy in my K class....when you teach 5 year olds you hear it all. One morning, I let a few kids in early while I set boy proudly announced that, "My mom peed on a stick and now she is going to have a baby!" Of course everyone knows that's how you get pregnant.


Ooh, sounds like the norovirus has hit the states. The UK was rife with a bug like that for a few months there. Hope you're feeling better!

kim at allconsuming

So Saturday I take the four boys on my own to my Dad's place, which is a two hour drive away.
Felix announces his tummy hurts about an hour after we get there.
Then he spews about an hour after that.
So I get them all in the car and start on the two hour drive home.
Until Jasper spews in his sleep.
And as I'm stripping him to his nappy on the side of a motorway, Oscar starts crying.
So I get him out of the car and he starts spewing on the side of the road too.
Then I get them home.
And there's vomit in the hallway, in the toilet, on the toilet, in a bed, on a lounge.
And then I start spewing.
And at one point have to hurl into a bucket while Grover is breastfeeding.
I spew every 15 minutes from about 7pm to 2am.
At one point I am quite delirious and yell at my husband to get the goat out of the well.

So you know.
I was thinking that I win.
And then I was trying to imagine all that hurling with grazed knees and maybe not so much.


I hope you are feeling better Amalah. Your little Noah is adorable in this picture. Well I take that back, he is always adorable!


He is just too cute and I don't care what anyone would care to say, I would carry him until I could not carry him anymore...or until he was 20 (LOL)

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