Still Talking About Not Talking
36 Weeks, Oh My God

He Still Has Green Paint All Over His Hands & I Couldn't Be Happier About It

I sometimes struggle over what constitutes an entry here...what's an important enough development to put into words and demand your eyeballs and indulgence, or what I should just post on Twitter, or maybe email to friends, or just file away in my own memory.

So this one is just for all of Noah's virtual aunts and uncles and cheerleaders, those of you who never. ever. fail to leave wonderful comments about him and your own children and family members, full of ideas and suggestions (to Liz, who suggested supplying Noah with word choices to encourage him to talk about past events [i.e. did you eat pizza or hamburger buns for lunch? did you go on the slide or hang out with those no-good ruffian beatniks at recess?]: THANK YOU. I gave myself the world's biggest forehead slap for not ever once thinking of trying that, and surprise! It works! Most of the time. I don't THINK his teacher's name is Ms. Pinky Dinky, but maybe I'm wrong).

I picked Noah up from school today -- his first Thursday class ever, and was greeted by his teacher, who was ECSTATIC. He'd had a great day -- his BEST day, thanks to a few new classmates who are a tad less "exuberant" (as she put it) than some of the Monday/Wednesday/Friday kids. Noah seemed less overwhelmed and was happy to play quietly with them throughout the day, following his calm little friends to circle time and snack time. He stayed focused and didn't wander away from the group constantly like he always does. I guess the hyper-verbal and in-your-face kids would bother him and trigger one of his little sensory-overload fits where he needs to step away and flit around the room while reciting scenes from The Incredibles and know, generally be weird for awhile.

People, he FINGERPAINTED today.

His teacher smiled when she told me, and nodded extra-knowingly at my shocked, slack-jawed reaction, because...FINGERPAINTS?

It turns out that in addition to having one boy with PDD-NOS, his teacher ALSO has a son with SID. Mild, like Noah's, but enough. Enough to raise red flags and eyebrows and make you feel like you're constantly strapped on a roller coaster while blindfolded -- are we headed into an upside-down loop-dee-loop or just one of those times where you get turned a little sideways and whipped around the track for a bit?

"I've been through it," she said, "I get it."

Anyway. I'm really happy that Noah will be there five days a week now, and that it was even an option for us -- there were three full-time spots left and a set of twins snagged two of them just hours before I decided to sign Noah up. The money is...well, it is more money and it is more money than I'm probably going to find in our couch cushions...but it's just something we'll make work because we need to make it work.

This blog is going on five years old now, and while I couldn't even count the number of dumb entries I've started and deleted and even published and deleted while trying to figure out what was vaguely post-worthy, I don't think I ever imagined that one day I would sit down to tell the Internet that MY SON FINGERPAINTED, in all caps, like I expected the ceiling to open up and dump balloons and confetti on us.

But here we are. It might not seem like much, just another mother blogging all her insignificant little dreamy dreams and the sort of thing that makes people yell that NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOUR KID, GAWD, but I know a lot of you DO care, and that means so much to me, so fuck everything and bust out your party hats because Noah had a kickass day at preschool and even if tomorrow sucks and I call for that private evaluation next week and end up crying about it and he never touches the fingerpaints again, today was a good, good day.



There was a hyper-verbal girl in my son's preschool class in Toronto who would get up in his face and say, "Hi, [name]" over and over again until he'd break down. Her defense was "I'm just saying hello."

When she and the other kids just a bit older than Scooter started half-day kindergarten, he was a totally different kid when they were gone.

(By the way, my late-talker is now incredibly verbose. OT seemed to make a huge difference. The people in our new school district don't believe me when I try to explain what he was like before.)


I love Noah's teacher. And Noah, of course, but that goes without saying. That teacher! It breaks my heart!


Awww, how awesome! I'm so happy for y'all!

Amy J

Go Noah!


That's so awesome Amy. Go Noah!


HOORAY for Noah!!! And plbbbbbbbbbbbbt to anyone who thinks this isn't important.

Your point about the MWF kids being more, ummm, energetic triggered a memory. When I was in pre-school my parents noticed that I started resisting going to school on Mondays. Further investigation revealed that there was an at-risk program in the school, and those kids were wilder on Mondays after having been at home in rather unstructured situations all weekend. It got bad enough that I was allowed to drop out. Hey! I should put "pre-school dropout" on my bio somewhere.

It's probably not exactly the same thing for Noah's peers, of course. :) Just enjoying my walk down memory lane.




We do care and thank you so much for sharing that with us! Fingerpainting - wahoo!! And so happy that you have found a teacher that gets it, and gets Noah. Way to go, to all of you!


I bet this will be one of those entries you reread years later and are so glad you recorded in the annals of published posts. (Rather than the wasteland of drafts, OH MY SWEET BABY JESUS ON A RITZ, THE DRAFTS.) (Uh, my dashboard is a little clogged right now and the Type A DOES NOT LIKE.)

Noah can fingerpaint my computer screen any time he wants.

Greg S

Don't ever worry about a topic being worthy of blogging. Some posts are profound, some just funny, some are sort of day-in-the-life. All of them are interesting for one reason or another. And in case you were wondering, I think this one falls in first category. (Or at least "moving".)

anne nahm

Glad to hear it!

Stephanie Melton

GO NOAH! And go Amy - you both deserve every hard-fought preschool victory - big or small. And I think this is BIG! So happy for you and will always be in your corner, cheering you guys on. Thanks for sharing both the hard stuff AND the good days. You're a great mom.


Congrat to you and Noah!

The Other Laura

Hooray for Noah!!!!


I know; I get it. That's huge. +1 in the 'thanks, that warmed me into a big smile' column.


I can't remember how I found your blog, but I've been reading for years...never posting comments, but I'm a faithful reader. I am so happy for you and Noah today. I think I cried a little bit. So happy!


Sometimes, as a parent, there are moments that bring you such joy. Moments that you would never expect to bring you such joy.

And who the hell cares?! It is such a hard job to be a parent and there are some milestones that make you feel that it's all going to be okay.

I'm so glad that Noah had such a good day.


yeah for kickass preschool days! I have to offer word choices to my non-vocabulary challenged preschooler too!


I can't believe for a moment that you debated whether that was a worthy post. Noah rocks. So does his teacher. His mom, too, come to think of it.


Go Noah! Look it does matter!!! I was talking about your blog at work today and found out a guy I work with reads you blogs to. It's a small world!!


Congrats to you and Noah. I've been reading you for a few years now and you crack me up. We also started preschool this year, so I understand that every little detail is a milestone. You must be so proud of him!


This was the best part of my day: reading about Noah's fantastic one. Happy!


That's great! Maybe the slightly less animated kids are just what he needed.


Congrats! Sometimes small steps are actually huge steps and you deserve to celebrate Noah's progress.

Jennifer A

Totally understand and its worth it to blog about. I have a son with SID and if we can get him to fingerpaint, its a great day.



What did he paint? Pictures please.


I've never said a word to you before now, but I've read all your words, so that makes us good friends, of the lopsided sort, &, yes, I do care, too. Congratulations to all of you.

Jessica K

Yay!!! Go Noah!!




Go Noah!


Oh, man - FINGERPAINTS?!! I am so happy for you and Noah, really. I loved fingerpaints as a kid and it makes me happy to know someone else loved them today, especially someone as totally awesome as Noah. Congrats!


This virtual Auntie is pleased and proud for you! My kid is one of those in your face hooligans, so I get why Noah would rather have some alone time. ;)


(You guys are so awesome. I really cannot say that enough.)

(His fingerpaint masterpiece was still wet so I don't have it yet -- they always send art projects home a day or two later, unless they are deemed Bulletin Board Worthy. But either way, you KNOW I'm taking a picture of that shit tomorrow and forcing y'all to compliment his mad skillz.)


I started to cry and my youngest is 22 years old...I remember those days of success so well and for awhile they just were so once in a while...I so much liked this post.
Thank you for sharing this wonderful moment.


baby steps...isn't it amazing. And six months from now you will even look back at this entry and laugh at all the new things he will have accomplished by then!! But don't ever loose that feeling you got today, no matter what happens. It's a feeling you deserve and was a long time coming. And just remember that even if he does have "off days" every now and then, well HELL so do the rest of us, why should Noah be exempt?


Oh, I am tearing up over here. So proud of your little boy, so happy for your family. I hope that you never stop posting all of his milestones - I've been reading about Noah since I was a newlywed, and now I have a baby of my own.

Circle of life, whatnot... all I can say is, I feel like one lucky "internet aunt" today.

Go NOAH!!!


The ceiling should TOTALLY open up and dump balloons and confetti on you. Fingerpainting is AWESOME. My day was pretty good too - picking up Riley from preschool, I watched out the window and was pleased to see him playing with two other boys, instead of wandering the periphery of the playground by himself, as he often does. Sure, he was just following the boys around, but it was progress.

I love hearing about these milestones. I love hearing about Noah - always. Not only is he just an awesome kid in his own right, it's always nice to hear someone else going through what we are, and celebrate the triumphs with them.


I don't comment very frequently, but I had to today to say YAY NOAH!!! Your stories about Noah warm my heart.


Fingerpaint! That's fantastic! It is a big deal in so many ways. He stuck his fingers in GOOEY PAINT! I am so happy for you. Go Noah!


Noah rocks!! Seriously, my son is about to turn 1, and when I look at him and wonder what is ahead, I can only hope it holds days as party-worthy as today was for you guys!


I'm a long time reader/lurker and I just wanted to delurk and say that I really admire your writing. I've been reading for years and have very much enjoyed following the adventures of you and Noah and I'm cheering for him from the sidelines!

bethany actually

Go Noah, with your painty fingers! :-) So glad the extra day of preschool already seems to be a good thing.


YEA NOAH! We are so proud of you!


GO Noah!!!

Frame that fingerpaint, mom!! Display that proudly!

SO thrilled to hear today went's to more great days!



OF COURSE we care! We wouldn't read if we didn't care.

Hooray for Noah fingerpainting! That is awesome. I'm so glad it was a good day for him, and for you.

midlife mommy

Go Noah! And congrats to mom!


Yay for Noah! And yay for you guys! And yay for good days!


That is so great! I totally am looking forward to the day my son will do that-I know he has it in him, it just isn't coming out yet. Noah's accomplishment gives me hope for the future!


such fabulous news! and yup, the money will find a way to be there because it is important and for your son. it's weird how you think you can't afford something until your child needs it, then other stuff is so not important any more. I think the preschool teacher was sent from heaven!


Yay, Noah! I wish I had balloons and confetti to throw down from the ceiling. And HOW AWESOME is his teacher? Wow!

Kia (good enough mama)

I'm probably biased, having a son myself with SPD/SID, but I think this is definitely noteworthy! FINGERPAINTS, DOOOODSSSS!!!!! Effing A!


can only type "hooray!"
am crying too much for more typing.


I know I am approximately the millionth comment, which has always seemed to prevent me from commenting in the past, but I just want to say, "Way to go, Noah!" and Amy, I think you're great.


Way to go, Noah!


YAY NOAH! Totally big-deal, totally blog worthy! And sometimes the easiest answer is totally the right one. (And if I say totally one more time, I will smack myself.)


K, YEAH! NOAH! I must say that I am/or have been that mom who you loathe to run into in the hall at preschool. The won whose face you read to say "WTF is wrong with that lady's kid..if she were only as good a mom as I am, her kid could function at preschool" (please read on!) You have taught me SO much about sensitivity and SEEING the kid who is not functioning as well as mine is and NOT JUDGING and NOT being that bitch in your preschool hallway. You have moved me amy and that's cool! I don't even have any preschoolers anymore, but I was a perfectionist BITCH. I am now intrigued by great moms who also have mastered all of the nuances of the f-word. :)


umm excuse my grammatical suicide:) 1TM chardonnays


Another fan here cheering, "YAY, for Noah!!"


RAH RAH RAH! hooray!! i was having a truly shitty day today and this just makes me so thrilled for you. my husband and i just recently started trying to conceive and i can. not. wait. for moments like these.

can you scan or take a picture of the art so we can all tell you how brilliant it is?

lots of love to you and hope your dad is doing okay!


Fantastic. Take 'em when you can get 'em and celebrate 'em. My Jack had a good day today too, and I immediately had everyone blow off homework and go play video games. All because Jack drew a smiley face on a teddy bear.

We all have our victories.


Yeah Noah! Congrats! Every big milestone like this deserves some confetti! My daughter pooped on the potty today for the first time ever and I had to blog! I know the feeling. I thought she would never relax enough to do it. But she did, so I am celebrating with you!


If I had a party hat or confetti I would throw it for you - seriously - because that is just wonderful.


Been there. I so totally get it. Fabulous news on the fingerpainting. and the money? well, we (all parents, but esp. parents of kids with any kind of special need) try and make it work however we can. Our family is much poorer since our special needs son came along but I don't regret it at all.


Yay for Noah!!!


Awesome, awesome, SO awesome!


A big ol' smile for you, and a great big (or gentle, whichever's better) high-five for Noah!!! :)


Finger paints rock for any kid. getting to make a mess on purpose..
they can't resist..

Mommy Cracked

That's terrific! My 3 year old son also has SID and he had an amazing day yesterday at preschool. And yes, I blogged about it. I don't care...I'm super proud of how far we have come.

Mrs. Flinger

I'm not the 168th person to care, I'm just the 168th person to comment. Many, many more are cheering on Noah and we're all sorts of teary giddy and mushy for this lil' man who is now FINGER PAINTING and because of teh awesomeness of teh blawg, we totally get it. Noah! Next up? Shaving cream!


I care. I am SO HAPPY that Noah has a teacher who *gets* him. That in itself is a priceless gift.

Jessica (from It's my life...)

WHOOOOHOOOOOHHOOOOO You GO Noah! We all knew you could do it! WHOOOHOOOO.


YEAH Noah!

My son has a speech delay and SPD and blew bubbles for the first time today. I had no one to share it with because people just don't get how HUGE it is.

Thanks for sharing.


Can I tell you that I posted one day because my daughter had hair on her back. Weird? She'd been totally bald from one end to the other from chemo and to see that she was getting body hair back was amazing to me. Maybe not to the vast majority of the world, but my blog is my little piece of the world to celebrate our triumphs and hairy backs and days of fingerpaint definitely rank up there.

Amy Evangeline

Woohoo Noah!!! I care not only about the event, but also about you caring about the event. If that makes sense. Basically I am commending your mommy heart, so woohoo Amy too!


I'm so glad! I don't respond a ton here, but I have been reading for a couple of years pretty religiously and I'm so happy you shared this happy news with us!!!

Go, Noah!!!


Hooray for Noah!


I've never commented before...but if ever a post deserved a comment this one is it! Yay for good days for you and for Noah and yay for fingerpaints!


Three cheers for fingerpainting!


Go Noah!

P.S. I feel like such an ass. I'm sitting here crying for you because Noah had a good day.


am delurking cuz no one said this yet (not sure why since it is right there in the blog, you silly rabbits XP). are you ready? okay you're ready...

Noah is MR. INCREDIBLE! Go fingerpaints, just go. Rock on with your bad self.


What a great day. Well done little Noah and well done Amy and Jason for supporting him and loving him enough that he could overcome his fear.

My proverbial party hat is most definitely on...


Congrats to Noah for having such a wonderful day..I hope he has many more wonderful days to come.


Thanks for sharing! I think we can all understand that euphoric feeling when someone precious to us overcomes an obstacle.


Sometimes it's the seemingly "little things" that are the biggest deal. Yay Noah! =)


That is fabulous! I'm a little teary-eyed over here in joy for Noah's great day :)


You're a mom. Eve. the smallest victories are post worthy! So happy for Noah :)


Yay for good days! Yay for fingerpaints! And yay for teachers who understand and let you know you aren't alone!

May Noah have many more wonderful days!


What a difference calmer company makes!
Also, I think Noah's teacher is pretty dang awesome.
I wish my kindergarten teacher had been more aware of such things when I didn't want to eat the Italian Ice for the Letter I because, well, it was strawberry flavored and pink! I didn't eat berry things! Or pink things! (Actually, uh, I still kinda don't...) She couldn't understand why I wouldn't just eat it.
I also don' finger-painting. Or touching other stuff with that kind of consistency.
So! Noah has me beat six ways from Sunday! Yaaaayyyy Noah!!!!
My virtual party hat is SO on right now :)


Way to go Noah! =D


This is the first post I read this morning and I'd like to thank you for starting my day so wonderfully. I may not comment often but I do care. And I'm so happy you all had a good, good day! Noah ROCKS!


YAY NOAH! He touched the slimy, cold, icky fingerpaints and loved it! What could be better than that?


THAT IS AWESOME!!! I'm so very happy for you. I hope that all his days become better and better. I've only recently began reading you but I must admit, I'm hooked. I have a set of twins of my own and the more I read about Noah the more I wonder if one of my boys doesn't have some sensory issues. If he gets anything on his hands at all, he automatically comes to me or his dad to wipe it off. And loud noises or crowds...forget about it. Anyways, I digress. Best wishes from Virginia and I hope that your little man continues to do wonderfully. You might be amazed what a new sibling will do for him. I bet he steps up to be a wonderful big brother!


Delurking to say "my heart just got all fluttery and I'm smiling ear to ear!"

I LOVE Noah's teacher!


So happy for you and Noah! How great is it that he has a teacher that GETS it? Fingerpaints definitely warrant a celebration!


Yay for fingerpainting and Noah. I like reading about pretty much any of the stuff you write about.


You've provided me with what may very well be my only smile of the day. Thank you for sharing your family so openly with us.


Fingerpaint is a huge deal. I remember the first time my SID kid voluntarily went into the sand. SAND had been the DEMON and the DEVIL and she went into it after 6 months of OT.

I'm glad for you.



I work with young special needs kiddos and fingerpainting is HUGE!!!!! CONGRATS





We have a little guy with SID also, and last year when he fingerpainted for the first time (with green, as chance would have it), we took a thousand pictures and one of them became our holiday card. Most people didn't have a clue about the significance, but we knew. So I get it. I really do. Go Noah.

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