Jason: Here, I got you something.
Amy: YAY I LIKE THINGS.
Amy: (pulls package from shopping bag)
Amy: What the fuck?
Amy: Jean diapers. You actually bought a pack of THE JEAN DIAPERS.
Jason: You know, for your blog.
Amy: I get the sense that this could be one of those moments that Ezra will one day point to and say "THAT. RIGHT THERE. IS WHERE SHIT GOT MESSED UP."
Amy: (pulls ridiculous jean-patterned diaper from package)
Amy: OMG THEY HAVE A FAKE ZIPPER FLY ARE YOU KIDDING ME.
Jason: AND POCKETS. DID YOU SEE THE FAKE POCKETS.
Amy & Jason: HA HA HA HA HA.
Amy: We're total cloth diaper snobs now, aren't we?
Jason: Yep. I'll go get the baby.
(For the record, Ezra: While the gimmicky diaper was ALL YOUR FATHER'S IDEA, please note that you cannot blame us for your choice of footwear, as the knock-off Crocs are all you. As in, you dug them out of a box of hand-me-downs, put them on all by yourself, and now scream and tantrum if we ever try to take them off or suggest you wear anything else. Last night you tried to wear them to bed.)
(Don't look at me like that.)