The Deodorant Wars, Crime Noir Edition: The Devil Had Dry Armpits

The Incredible True Adventures of the Wonnerpets in Poopland

Dinner is over, for the most part. Jason and I are still at the table, procrastinating on the cleaning up.

Ezra heads to the bathroom to wash his hands. He is singing.

"Top um bottom, top um bottom, immatween!"

When he returns, he is pushing an empty laundry basket. He is excited. He has a plan.

The laundry basket is carefully arranged next to an Ikea stepladder. 

"Is a Flyboat!" he announces.

(For the un-Nick-Jr-initiated: THIS.)

He is singing again.

"Wonnerpets, Wonnerpets, on our way, to halp da..."

He stops. He looks around for a suitable object for his pretend rescue mission. He chooses a stuffed rabbit he finds on the floor.

"To halp da baby rabbit an save da day..."

The stuffed rabbit is, in fact, a squeaky dog toy. 

But for now, it is in mortal peril.

"Come on! Follow me!" he implores Noah. "To da Flyboat!"

"To the Flyboat!" Noah obliges. 

And they are off. 

For the next hour -- at least -- they play a frantic and elaborate game of climbing in and out of the laundry basket via the stepladder, clutching the stuffed rabbit and occasionally beating on the laundry basket with a broom. 

"It's broken," Noah explains. "We have to fix it."

And then they run a lap around the entire first floor. Ezra continues to sing.

"Gooooo Wonnerpets!'

And then they are back in the laundry basket. And then they are out. Another lap. Back in.

Ike is looking up and over my shoulder, oblivious, happily enjoying some butt pats. He is cooing at our wall of picture frames. 

Noah declares that the entire living room is dangerous and must be avoided. "This is Poopland," he says.

Ezra carefully lines up several pairs of shoes back in the kitchen. "Baby rabbit! Go back to your frens!" he says, placing the rabbit in front of my running shoes. 

A snap bracelet shaped like a snake has joined the mission. It also gets reunited with its friends, played here by Noah's Crocs.

Noah is now riding the Flyboat-fixing broomstick around the house, singing the theme song from Harry Potter. 

He tries to drag Ezra in the laundry basket at the same time. "WE NEED MORE TEAMWORK!" he shrieks. "I WILL GET MY MAGIC WAND."

Realizing his wand was confiscated earlier for poking-related infractions, he goes with a bendy straw. "WINGARDIAM LEVIOSA!" he shouts at the laundry basket. "PEW PEW PEW!"

"BABY RABBIT NOOOO!" Ezra shrieks after hurling it across the room, where a thoroughly confused Ceiba has grabbed her toy and taken it off to Poopland. The boys thunder off in full pursuit.

The noise level is ridiculous. They are running at top speed. Someone is going to fall down, crash into something, get hurt. 

I look at Jason. Our sides hurt from laughing so hard.

"This right here," I say, "is why I had children."

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Right on! I love witnessing elaborate games of make-believe. Do you allow sofa cushion forts? Cuz they are awesome too.


Love their imagination! Maggie hasn't "played" Wonderpets but I get to hear a recap of whatever episode she randomly remembers on rides home from daycare. Since she has just watched Harry Potter for the first time I expect the spells to start being sent my way any day now as well!


Awesome. In our house, the spell of choice is "Expelliarmus". Over and over and over again.


Adroable! Although, this post did leave me yearning for that step stool! Linky??


I love it. I had kids for the same reason. I wish I could have seen my oldest and youngest play like that. Hopefully we'll get there.

Jen L.

I wanna play at your house. Imagination is the greatest friend a kid can have!


Wonderpets are a favorite in our house but the flyboat is two pottery barn kids stuffed chairs pushed end to end. I love watching their little minds work!


You are a wonderful, happy break from my business du jour: explaining the intracies of our State Small Business Credit Initiative in layman terms.

Long live boys and the games they play!


And intricacies, too. :)


Oh, yes.

C @ Kid Things

It's always gotta be something Poop with boys, doesn't it?


You either have a great memory or take great notes! That is awesome.

I've always liked the Wonder Pets. Am hoping having a younger son now will make the older son appreciate it more again!


That right there is why I want children. Good work!


This is just filled with awesome.


The "Wingardium leviosa!" part cracked me up. It kinda sounds like my house at night at bathtime when we have to find Nemo, who is apparently so dumb that he swims to his death every day down the drain. If we can't "find" him, my son gets ridiculously upset. I hate that effing fish sometimes.


That right there is THE best. I love when the TV is off and no one notices, how elaborate and thought-out their imaginary games can get. Just wait till Ike joins the fray, randomly screaming incoherently. The best'll get so much betterer.


yeah. now i want three boys, too.


I love the attention to detail! I felt like I was right there with them.


two thumbs up!! love it :-)


LOVE this! I'm so looking forward to having more of this in my home.

Siobhan Dobson

We just got back from Orlando and the Wizarding World of Harry Potter. Our 5 year old got his very own wand that looks just like Harry's and our 4 year old daughter chose Hermione's wand. Since we've been home they often have duels or alternately team up to go find "Voldemore" It's hilarious and totally why I'm glad I had more than one kid.


Oh this is so awesome, Isn't it just the greatest when they play together and are ridiculous. Boys are the best.


Isn't it great to go from PDD-NOS to absolutely-amazing- imagination-kiss-my-ass-evaluations!

Your family is fantastic!


This whole post just made me so happy. Your boys are awesome!

Jessica V

What an awesome post...this totally made me smile today. I also have 2 boys (6 and 2.5) and watching them play together is the best. Recently, when they've gotten in trouble for various couch-jumping infractions and get sent to their rooms, I'll hear one "sneaking" into the other's room (via a shared bathroom and lots of giggling) where they'll play together without the TV and just have a blast. That is also why I had kids!


I can't wait until my kids are old enough to play together! Sounds like fun.


Agreed. The best thing about having kids is that kids regularly remind you how wonderful it is to think like a kid. To kids, the world is ever-new and full of possibility, and the imagination is limitless, unbound by silly adult conventions. Can you combine Harry Potter with Wonderpets? Sure! Star Wars with Pokemon and pirates? You bet! And you can also absolutely be a scientist and a rock star and the president all at the same time. And the good guys CAN always win, and the world (and cuddly baby bunnies) can always be saved.


Sure enough, every game eventually evolves into Calvinball ... !

Heather R

This is a bit off subject, but I am wondering how Noah knows so much about Harry Potter. Have you read the books to him? I only ask because I started reading chapter books to my 4.5 year old recently. We have read some Little House books, and a couple Roald Dahl books. I wasn't sure about Harry Potter, if would be too scary for her....?


Thanks for this, I needed this today. It has been a rough week with my todder, thank you.


I giggled through this entire post.

Love it...


What kind of Ezra shaped monster ate the toddler and left that Big Boy? He's huge and adorable and clearly very brave. How wonderful to be able to see them play together.



Anthony from CharismaticKid

This.... iss.... SERIOUSSSSS!!!!!

Goddess in Progress

Isn't that the best? This is why siblings rock. My twins are almost four, and they now spend hours coming up with things just like this, mash-ups of their favorite TV shows, stories, and random memories. (Today, they are Jake and Izzy, the Neverland Pirates.) It's spectacular, and not just because it means they can amuse themselves while I take care of the baby. I love that, cliche as it may be, they always have a friend.



My input for Heather - the first few Potter books & movies are pretty tame - certainly no scarier than most Fairy Tales. By the time you get through the first one, you'll know whether or not she's ready for more scary stuff. Certainly you'll want to save the last few books (and movies) until she is a bit older, they are much darker. Our son is 7 and he is allowed to watch the first 3 movies but we're making him wait a while for the later ones - they get darker and more dangerous as you go. A lot depends on her tastes - go with your guts! My Maxx would eat the scary stuff in the later movies right up at this age but considering that when he was younger, he used to strongly identify with the villan instead of the hero, we just don't want to expose him to that really dark stuff yet.


This? Makes me think that maybe I could go through a second pregnancy. I just don't think the dog's imagination is that good yet, so my prospective tadpole is going to need another playmate.


"We Need More Teamwork!!"

This weekend, when it's time to clean? I'm totally using that line. ;)


That was seriously one of the funniest things I've ever read mostly since my two do similar things. Though we have no Poopland more's the pity....


What a great post! I don't have my own kids yet, but I love watching Wonderpets with my pint-sized friends (although the innuendo in the baby beaver episode is almost more thank I can handle with a straight face).


Adventures in Poopland! Priceless........
As a mom to 3 sons, 14,16 and 20, those are things to remember. :)


My oldest, Kenneth, is 16 now. I love that he will play with his eight year old sister and seven year old brother. Before I got rid of the bunk bed, they were always using the top as a spaceship or a regular ship to run away from the aliens or pirates. Love!

Jenni Chiu

I am smack in the middle of fantasy and pretend over here too! It's the best. Makes all the poop I've had to deal with worth it.


Wow... I took a pregnancy test last night and I was absolutely certain I was thrilled that it was negative... Until just now.

Your children are so amazing. Thank you for sharing their adventures!


Aww this is my favorite. Substitute "Jake and the Neverland Pirates" for "Wonderpets" and you have my daughters' neverending pretend play. I love it so much I ache.


My husband still sings "what's gonna work?..." and I always am the one to sing back "Teamwork!!" while my 8 and 14 year olds look at us like we've lost our minds. That show used to drive me crazy, and now it's payback. :)


Your kids are made out of pure awesome :)


"The stuffed rabbit is, in fact, a squeaky dog toy. But for now, it is in mortal peril." ... hahahahaha Seriously, it's incredible (and often hilarious) to look at the world through innocent and curious eyes.


I love that I read this while Team Umizoomi is on.


This is why I sometimes wish I had more than one - I worry that my little only is missing out on the stuff I got to play as the oldest of four. :( So cute!!


This is why I sometimes wish I had more than one - I worry that my little only is missing out on the stuff I got to play as the oldest of four. :( So cute!!


My girls are the same way. Gracie is almost 3 and she sings the "top an bottom, top an bottom..." hand washing song. There are literally thousands of things that can be played with a laundry basket. ha love it!


The Wonnerpets in Poopland is full of the awesomeness.


Excellent pretend play Noah!
And I agree, these are the moments that make life worth living. ;)



that, my friend, is like the greatest thing you could ever hear your kid say.

go noah. also... go ezra.


Team Umizoomi is allllll the rage at our house now. "Milli Geo Bot Milli Geo Bot Milli Geo Bot" followed by "chirp chirp tweet tweet" over and over and over again.

God bless the staff at Nick Jr. If they ever go on strike or cease production, we're screwed.

(With the notable exception of Dino Dan, of course. I wish that show would just fade into extinction.)


Ahhh. I remember when my best friend Robin had goats in her backyard when I was in 2nd grade and we called her house "dooky world." Poopland, Dookie World, oh the memories...

Your kids are awesome. Treasure this time, because soon they will be pre-teens and beating the hell out of each other :)

Rebecca Van Hout

Reading this post made me smile. LOVE kids imaginations. Spectrum kids have the best ones imho despite what the "experts" think! (I have 5 kids with 2 boys on the spectrum)

Rebecca Van Hout

Reading this post made me smile. LOVE kids imaginations. Spectrum kids have the best ones imho despite what the "experts" think! (I have 5 kids with 2 boys on the spectrum)


And that is the exact perfect reason to have kids.


Last night, my kids played almost the exact same game, only instead of "poopland" they were saving the baby animals from "booty". They must read your blog, too.


Oh, dear -- there I was thinking that you had one kid, one toddler, and one baby and this is proof that you have two kids and only one baby.

Makes me a bit sad, even though I'm laughing. Ezra just kills me.


This right here is why we are all glad you are a blogger.

Maxine Dangerous

Hordes of women are standing up from reading this entry and flushing their birth control pills down the toilet. :) My God. This was FABULOUS. :D


Amen and amen! And that is also why we grandparents love our grandchildren. Bet you Dad was laughing his head off too as he watched from above! Great post! Thank you!


Next to the giant metal chicken, that is the funniest blog post I've read all week. Thanks for bringing happiness to me house!

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