Noah For President
March 04, 2013
I imagine many of you, upon hearing the words "LET ME SHOW YOU MY KID'S ART PROJECT," have the exact same reaction as if I said "LET ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT THIS WEIRD DREAM I HAD."
Which is to promptly set yourself on fire, and then run away screaming that you left the iron on and Beyonce's on the phone.
Which is fine and understandable and LET ME SHOW YOU MY KID'S ART PROJECT.
Noah had to put together a book for President's Day and answer some questions about what he would do when he becomes president. Which is definitely going to happen. Nothing is going to hold this kid back when it comes to fulfilling his dream of Holding A Stick and Having A Hat. NOTHING, I TELL YOU. IT"S THE AMERICAN DREAM. YOU WERE IN THE DREAM TOO, BUT NOT REALLY AS YOURSELF, YOU KNOW? IT WAS WEIRD.
I don't know who the man and woman are on the other side of the desk here, or what their speech squiggles represent, but I like to imagine that it's me and Jason, continuing to provide guidance and counsel to our hat-wearing, stick-holding runaway success of a child.
I also imagine Noah is telling us to get the hell away from his desk and out of his chair. God, Mom, shut up.
This is either a really solid presidential plan or a rejected storyboard from a Damon Lindelof sequel to Air Force One.
Ledis = lettuce? I think?
In other words, Mom, I will eat that salad when I am President, pigs fly, hell freezes over, etc.
COME BACK HERE DOG I HAVE A STICK.
Please note the SERIOUS EYEBROWS. He is not messing around. Everyone please commence caring about each other right this second. He will send your ass to jail, people. Stop being a bunch of jerks.
I cannot argue with that. He really would. STORCH 2040.
Tears. Go Noah!!
But, dude? Lettuce isn't so bad.
Posted by: Tiffany | March 04, 2013 at 12:33 PM
I totally read it as "I would eat Jedis" - the J is just missing a curve and a dot. :)
Posted by: E | March 04, 2013 at 12:33 PM
I love this!
Posted by: Hayley | March 04, 2013 at 12:34 PM
When I read that last sentence, I totally read it as STORCH 2004, instead of 2040.
For a second, I was thinking Noah was going to go back in time to 2004 to run for president. I would definitely vote for a president who could time travel, if he gave that power to the people.
I would love to go back in time and talk myself out of some really unfortunate hair and fashion choices. Believe me, that would benefit mankind. I'm so thoughtful. And dyslexic.
Posted by: CC | March 04, 2013 at 12:38 PM
Noah Storch "I have a dream!"
Posted by: Michele | March 04, 2013 at 12:40 PM
This is soooooooooooo precious!
Posted by: jgottlieb | March 04, 2013 at 12:47 PM
I think I speak for all your readers....
When you say, "LET ME SHOW YOUR MY KID'S ART PROJECT!"
We say "BRING IT."
Because his artwork + your commentary= WIN.
Hilarious. As usual.
Posted by: Jenn H. | March 04, 2013 at 12:47 PM
He's got my vote!
Posted by: LD's Mom | March 04, 2013 at 12:59 PM
I think he is impressed by Lincoln (the hat, the caring about ALL people. I suppose he had a walking stick - google shows many for sale, but no pics of him with one)
Or maybe he also admired Teddy Roosevelt. Does he speak softly?
Posted by: Lisa | March 04, 2013 at 01:00 PM
Lettuce = Lead Us
Posted by: Sarah | March 04, 2013 at 01:16 PM
I have 2 totes full of school stuff like this that I can't throw away. My kids will probably never appreciate them, but I LUB THEM!
Posted by: Sarah | March 04, 2013 at 01:17 PM
NOAH is awesome! We already knew this but each post confirms it even more. Also, 1st grade projects are awesome! I took a pic of my son's chalkboard drawing because he wrote "Mommy is prety." Missing a "t" but who cares!
Posted by: Karen | March 04, 2013 at 01:31 PM
I see this as a promising platform. Animal friendly - the dog. Fashion farward - top hat and cane. Health conscious - lettuce eating and all. Compassionate - the law about caring. I'd vote for it! :)
Posted by: Alexia | March 04, 2013 at 01:33 PM
So he doesn't expect a successful trip to Antartica, then? That's too bad, I think he'd be a great president. I love the crashing plane bit, complete with comic book style explosion & "CRASH!" and the "AAAAAAA!" coming from the crashing plane.
Posted by: Abbey | March 04, 2013 at 01:47 PM
The child in the last one is disgruntled. Did he not agree to be in a publication with the president?
Posted by: Arnebya | March 04, 2013 at 02:10 PM
Gosh, I hope my kids never get a project like this. They're American citizens, but they weren't born in the US - they'll never be President if the crazed Birther people are anything to go by.
Posted by: Tam | March 04, 2013 at 02:12 PM
Lettuce ~ Lead us?? Goes with the plot of the rest of the book I'd think
Posted by: Marci | March 04, 2013 at 02:19 PM
I also thought he wanted to eat Jedis.... I was like, that is badass.
Posted by: SLS | March 04, 2013 at 02:35 PM
Oh, dude. I have been reading your blog for years. Years! This is by far the Best. Entry. Ever. Thank you for sharing. Seriously, I heart this. I wish we were neighbors.
Posted by: AnotherAmy | March 04, 2013 at 02:40 PM
Can I cast my vote now?
Posted by: sheilah | March 04, 2013 at 02:53 PM
that is just too sweet, i love the spellings of words my son is the same he spells Thank like fanc ha ha!
Posted by: welcome to the mummy madness | March 04, 2013 at 03:00 PM
eyebrows are cracking me up....
Posted by: jb | March 04, 2013 at 03:03 PM
The cane, man. The cane and the top hat makes him the best candidate ever.
Posted by: jill (mrschaos) | March 04, 2013 at 03:44 PM
This totally made my day. And I don't usually enjoy other people's children's art projects. But I really did laugh. Hilarious and wonderful. What a boy. : )
Posted by: Jen | March 04, 2013 at 04:35 PM
Dawwwwwwwwwwwwwwww! Time to make campaign buttons.
Posted by: Brie | March 04, 2013 at 05:34 PM
I will vote for Noah. FOR SURE.
Posted by: Summer | March 04, 2013 at 06:06 PM
Yay! Noah for President! And Pope!
Posted by: Liana | March 04, 2013 at 06:50 PM
I think Noah is thinking about the pope instead of the president. Which is good, because they are looking for a new pope.
Posted by: Jill | March 04, 2013 at 06:56 PM
Is it just me? I thought perhaps the cane and hat were inspired by the recent Island of Sodor commentary! Perhaps he views Sir Topham Hat as the island's president?
Posted by: kari weber | March 04, 2013 at 07:55 PM
I love that the stick and hat kept reappearing!
BTW Noah should share this with our current president and the next one. He has some good insight I think we could benefit from.
Posted by: Lis | March 04, 2013 at 08:26 PM
I'm dying over those speech bubbles and serious eyebrows. Why DON'T we have a law that everyone has to care about each other? Also, ledis=awesome.
Posted by: Leigh Ann | March 04, 2013 at 08:55 PM
His dog will be named Greg? Graeg?
Best dog name ever, either way.
Posted by: Danell | March 04, 2013 at 09:19 PM
That is the cutest dang thing that I have seen in quite some time!
Actually it's so cute it made me say "dang" and I'm Australian - such is the power of Prez Storch
Posted by: Justine | March 04, 2013 at 09:21 PM
I tell people about my weird dreams all the time. I think that's normal. Love the presidents day presentation. A+ for Noah.
Also think I already commented here. It's the wine.
Posted by: Barb | March 04, 2013 at 10:42 PM
Awww. He's wearing a tie, too. Very classy.
Posted by: Alison | March 05, 2013 at 03:33 AM
My 8 year old draws the same angry eyebrows and also wants to be president someday! Perhaps it's a sign of things to come...
Posted by: Andrea | March 05, 2013 at 08:13 AM
I'm voting for him! If I'm still alive by then that is...
Posted by: Bozoette Mary | March 05, 2013 at 09:24 AM
This is awesome. You can tell Noah that the people of the Internets will always have his vote.
Posted by: Cara | March 05, 2013 at 12:05 PM
My 7yr old son had this "If I Were President" assignment too - and I wanted to curl up in the fetal position when I saw it hanging in his classroom...http://www.sarahviz.com/2012/11/blog-post.html
Posted by: Sarahviz | March 05, 2013 at 12:37 PM
He's got my vote. I like his politics - and, dude, who doesn't want a President that wears a hat and has stick. I bet it helps you run the country better....
Posted by: Lauren | March 05, 2013 at 12:40 PM
Noah has my vote! Mostly because we need another president with a top-hat.
Posted by: Tara Yelman | March 05, 2013 at 12:47 PM
This made me laugh so hard I cried. Especially the lettuce. I can't wait until my kids are this age...
Posted by: Shenoah | March 05, 2013 at 01:40 PM
He's ready....2040 is just too long to wait for this kind of genius!
Posted by: Amanda | March 05, 2013 at 09:01 PM
Am I laughing or crying? Hard to tell. Either way, he's got my vote!
Posted by: Cassadie | March 06, 2013 at 01:13 AM
Wait... is the future president's dog named GRAEG? That is awesome.
Posted by: robin | March 06, 2013 at 01:05 PM
I cannot begin to tell you how much I loved this post. omahgah! Fabulous. My older son just turned 5 and is finally starting to draw. I cannot wait for this phase!
Posted by: Marianne | March 07, 2013 at 06:25 PM
Oh...em...gee. My heart melted when I read he would pass a law that says everyone has to care about each other!! <3 Noah for president!
Posted by: Sarah | March 07, 2013 at 06:56 PM
Goddamit, I love kid art. Even other people's kid art. Go, Noah, go!
Posted by: Danabee | March 08, 2013 at 09:43 AM