I stick to the mantra when he gets hungry, he will eat.

I'm so glad to read this because, as a first-time mama of a picky eater, I was certain that I had done something wrong to "make" my son this way. Good to know that we have no control either way when it comes to picky/not picky eaters! It's quite liberating, actually.

I am so happy to read this. My daughter, who is ALMOST 6, STILL is the pickiest eater alive. And, like Ike, she started out doing all the "right" things, and would try things as a young toddler. But, your list of Ike's intake is strikingly simlilar to her list. Still. I did bend and do short-ordered cooking because she would also morph from hungry to demon and even then, would NOT eat. She's strong willed and stubborn and determined.

I would also read that book. And buy the T-shirt.

Okay, I read your blog and columns all the time and have NEVER commented before (because I'm an ass like that), but I've got to tell you that you have been such an inspiration in feeding my toddler. I bought Satter on your advice, never looked back and we are gifted with an Ezra style eater. But here's the thing. This approach can't guarantee a non picky eater, but what you've taught me is to sure as hell make sure it doesn't get any worse. I'm sure it's at this exact stage that so many parents panic and give in to short order cooking, but it's good to know that when their growth slows they can seriously survive on f all and it turns out they'll be fine. Parents everywhere should be reassured by this. Let us know when Ike's regular eating resumes. Because it will.

I will also buy that book. Because it's this kind of beautiful insight that has saved my sanity since my preggers days when I started reading your stuff. Thank the Interwebz Gods for you and please, somebody, make me put down all those damn parenting books I'm still reading.

Sounds like my toddler to a T.

She was a GREAT eater when she was a baby, willingly eating everything in sight, including French Onion Soup.

Now (and since she turned a year old), it's a beige-only diet. Uggh. We don't short order cook, but some nights she only eats bread. And milk. Always milk.

But lo and behold, our picky 4 year old is starting to actually eat things again. She ate sauteed green beans the other day (multiple green beans!)! So there is hope. And there's always breakfast the next morning.

My parents always tell me stories about how I used to eat everything in sight. I loved pretty much any food that was put in front of me, and then I turned 3 and decided I hated ALL THE THINGS. From 3 until pretty much 23 or 24, my entire diet was limited to things like chicken tenders, french fries, grilled cheese and pastas without any sauce on them. I learned to make my own "dinner" when I was 7 because my parents refused to make special meal accommodations for me. They tried the "starve it out" method, but I was more stubborn than anticipated.

Now I'm slowly starting to experiment with new things, but it took being able to cook and have total control of EXACTLY what was going into my dishes for me to start taking risks when it came to food. But I still won't touch anything that has ever even thought about fraternizing with a tomato. I have to have some standards.

I'm totally going to be cursed to have children exactly like me.

It's normal for two year olds to slow down on eating. If they continued to eat at the rate they did up until then, they'd be in triple digit weight by kindergarten. Pickiness? I wish I knew the answer. I used to make them eat three bites of everything, but that didn't work. My son is 42 and lives with me (because I am disabled and need his help) and he's still picky.

He will not touch shepherd's pie because he hates "mixed food", although he has no problems with beef stew with all the onions, carrots, potatoes and, yes, beef. He also loves Chinese food. And he eats jalapeno stuffed olives, which you could not pay me to touch.

And then there's me. Don't even offer me cauliflower. Or cooked carrots (I love them raw, though).

I guess we all have our little quirks.

THANK YOU. I've been reading since you were pregnant with Noah. And I think honestly, this might be my favorite parenting post from you ever - I would buy that book in a heartbeat as well as any merchandising you might do. Maybe its just timely for me :) At the very least, I will be referring all my "new parent" friends to this post. I only have two so my expertise and perspective are suspect. YOU however, have expertise and perspective in SPADES. And hearts and diamonds and clubs, and whatever other suits might exist in random games (swiss jass anyone?)

THANK YOU for this post. My 2.5 year old had a nice variety in his diet until about two years old, but now would eat bread and cheese crackers for every meal if I let him. Occasionally he will eat a fruit and yogurt smoothie, so I can toss in a handful of spinach. He also will sometimes eat Mac and cheese, so I'll stir in some canned puréed pumpkin just to introduce some color into his diet. He won't drink regular milk, but loves chocolate milk, so I'll blend milk plus cocoa and a little homey to try and keep sugar under control. So glad to hear that the pickiness isn't that unusual at this age, and that hopefully it will pass!

Okay, if you still are experiencing mom-guilt and doubt
Then:
A.) I, clearly, am not weird for experiencing it too
And
B.) Have no hope for ever figuring this mom-thing out.

That book is my life. I have one. A girl. And, srsly? SCREW THIS NOISE. I'm going back to bed. Please try not to kill urself kthx.

I have a friend whose wife brought raw carrot sticks along with the roasted carrots she made for our joint thanksgiving dinner because he won't eat cooked vegetables. He's 34.

I would totally buy that book. I feel like I already subscribe to it's core principle most days. Ike sounds just like my son at that age, down to the milk obsession. He'll be four in a couple of weeks and devoured a bowl of delicious and nutritious homemade chicken noodle soup for dinner tonight. The only thing he picked out were the pieces of celery (or "other kind of cucumbers" as he called them). Point is, it's just a phase but you already know that.

I feel like I should also add that I took inappropriate credit for my son's fantastic verbal skills. I'm an SLP so when he was speaking in crystal clear 4-5 word sentences at age 2 I patted myself on the back for my fab speech therapist skillz. Then came my daughter, who has about 5 garbley gook words at 17 months. Damn kids.

Ha! I love this post so much. Oh I know the blame game so well. My firstborn is a tad on the neurotic side and very shy, while my second born is an easygoing charmer. This is of course all my fault as I was too anxious with my firstborn and hated going to baby/toddler groups so she wasn't socialized properly. Or could it just be that my firstborn was born a natural & quirky introvert (like her mother)? Nah, everything is probably my fault. Being a mom is fun!

Ah, the joys of more than one child. My husband used to take all kinds of credit for our oldest when all the other toddlers were going insane and he was just chilling out with a truck or a book or something. Then our second came along. Same parents, same household, same rules – 100 times the insanity. Some things are just their personality. I can be super anxious about a lot of things, but I made up my mind a long time ago to not let food be one of them. I ate like crap as a kid because it’s what my parents could afford, and I love all kinds of fruits and veggies now. My husband’s mom is a fantastic cook who used fresh from the garden veggies, and he’d just as soon eat a Hot Pocket than anything else. There’s no accounting for taste right?

re: the outside of the pancake: my 3 year old son likes "bars." The only bars we have in the house are chocolate mint luna bars. He was vociferous that he wanted a bar, and fine, have one, but you don't like mint. One bite in, he declares that he wants the mint off, and proceeds to attempt eating only the top half of the bar, since it's only mint dipped on the bottom.

I forced FORCED my kid to order anything other than chicken fingers for about a year when he was 7. If we went out to eat, he had to order SOMETHING ELSE.

He started eating steak 'rare please' and tried my sushi and commandeered it and lordy, he doubled my restaurant bills. He's 22 now. I keep begging him to order chicken fingers for chrissakes, mah wallet hurts.

My 2 cents about kids? food and potty training are two things you cannot control. The kid has ALL the power. Might as well have another glass of wine and watch TV. I love my kid to pieces but MAN I'm glad that part of my life is in my rear view mirror!!

My 2.5 year old twins won’t eat anything for me. I didn't do anything different than for their older brother who is a good eater.

Right now the list of foods they eat.

Bread (Which is really a vessel for butter which they like to pick off – more butter)
Bananas
Crackers
One fella eats eggs & peanut butter &apples
Other fella eats cheese

No rice
No pasta
No meat
No fish
No veg
No juice

And if I try to give them a plate of something they don't want they would just fling the plate on the floor!

It is very frustrating.

I will totally buy the book and the t-shirt! And I will confess that I TOTALLY handed my 2-year-old the iPad in bed the other morning and rolled over (it was 5:37 and my husband was away, in my defense....).

Ah, kids and food. Thank you THANK YOU for recommending Satter, who has really helped me through so much potential garbage!

So, I tell myself that my 2-year-old can really really live on the air she apparently mostly lives on. Every so often she eats like a horse and that seems to get her through several 2-bite meals. We also try to keep snacking and grazing to a minimum, but some days, eh! Everyone is still thriving and growing..... and we are seeing signs that the 4 year old is pulling out of her picky phase.... One day we'll all be eating kale.

I hear you. My oldest is a selective eater (I don't like picky) She is going to camp at the end of the month and they asked me to send them her typical menu......
They got this.
Breakfast: Goldfish
Lunch: Goldfish
Dinner: Goldfish
Kid hasn't eaten a new food in years and has maybe a varity of 5 foods she will eat on the regular.

Also for baby number three we often say "and then there is Livie" its always followed by a sigh.